To not answer the door if I don’t know who it is?

I always answer the door to whoever knocks when I'm not expecting anyone. 9 times out of 10 it's someone trying to sell me something, the other time it's a neighbour or Amazon.

Starting to wish I was more like you lol

I have a ring doorbell so I can see who it is, you can speak to them from the app if you want to know more about who they are. I do sometimes (shock horror) not bother looking who it is when i’m wfh, I just answer. It seems that you’re not alone by not answering, which is your prerogative.

YANBU. Anyone who says you are is being ridiculous

I don't answer the door if I'm not expecting anyone or a delivery. I'm sick of people saying they can see damage to the roof or gutters and they can fix it. Sometimes they can be pushy. I don't need a Sky subscription, or to change my phone company either.

I have an annoying neighbour who sometimes knocks trying to offload stuff they no longer want.

I don't answer the door either. Unless I am expecting a friend, relative, or delivery.

I do have anxiety.

I also have a no backbone and can't say no. In shops, I get harassed by charity people and end up signing up for monthly donations (unless I'm with someone who saves me). Once back at home, I then cancel the direct debit.

I was once almost converted by JW's at home because I was too polite to say no.

So, yeah. No door answering here.

No phone calls from numbers I don't know either. I only answer calls from DH, DM, and my step kids. Even if it's a number I recognise I wait for whoever it is to leave a message and if it's important I'll call back.

Some people on MN are offended or disgusted or... something?... when they learn that someone they don't know on the Internet does things differently to how they do them.

I don't answer the door if I don't want to, including if I don't know who the person is and am not disposed to deal with them. If it's important they'll leave a note or contact me in some other way. One of the joys of being an adult is ignoring the phone and the door when I so choose. It's a liberating sensation to know that I'm in control of when, how, and even if I interact with random strangers!

Really?
Is there always someone in your house….just in case ?

Don’t you worry it’s someone checking the house is empty to break in?

Get a ring doorbell then if you don’t know them you can ignore

We’ve had dodgy people at our door before. One guy claimed to be a meter reader ( in the middle of the first lockdown ) we didn’t let him in. We phoned after he left to find out there were no meter readings going on at all…..so dodgy.

Another guy said he came to check to see if our solar panels had been fitted correctly and could he go into our loft…err no! He was, he said, doing this out of the goodness of his own heart 🤣🤣🤣🤣 really dodgy.

Honestly if we answered the doorbell every time it rang we’d end up being the local post office as delivery drivers can’t be bothered searching the country lanes…..So I’m in agreement with you OP.

I don't answer without checking who it is first. I look at my doorbell cam and see who it is. Usually it is something ok, a neighbour recieved our mail or an ecpected delivery. I have a bowl of coins in case kids come to fundraise by selling chocolate bars, but have not had any since 2020.

If you didn’t invite the person to your home then you aren’t obliged to open the door! You can get no cold caller signs to put up or look into a ring door bell/cctv. Also always ask for ID if it is someone like the electric meter man. Most people are harmless/annoying but I do understand the fear, we live rural and there are a couple of local robbery horror stories so I’m always careful.

Unless you live ina crime ridden hellhole you are being ridiculous

As I said upthread, there were two occasions I knocked on a stranger's door and was very glad that they answered.

The first was when a small DC was travel sick all over the car. It was during covid and we weren't sure why she'd been sick, but they gave us out wipes and plastic bags and let us use their outside taps.

The second was not long after and on the same stretch of motorway when our car broke down. We managed to pull off the motorway and stopped in a safe spot outside a house. I rang the doorbell when small DC needed the loo. Not only did they let us use their loo, but they welcomed all four of us with open arms and kept us fed and watered in their living room until the tow truck arrived.

Was it the height of rudeness of us to depend on the kindness of strangers?

This is exactly how I feel.

People have many ways now to warn or ask in advance if they can visit. There's no excuse to just turn up at someone's door.

The same for phone calls too. Please text in advance (or ideally don't attempt to call me at all!).

I always answer but we don't tend to get charity callers or anyone selling anything
It's usually the neighbour asking if their cat has broken into mine, or offering cake or something random like when my car had rolled back as the handbrake had failed

Was very grateful they answered the door when I needed help one evening and was panicking

If you never ever order anything online then I guess you know you don't need to answer it. Just peep put the window or get a door camera, then at least you'll see who's there. I wouldn't ignore it out of fear, but equally I wouldn't go downstairs if it looked like a salesman or charity collector.

Erm.,,

I always answer the door. We have an intercom (if that's what it's still called) so know who's there

It's either Royal Mail, Amazon, a religious zealot or a nice neighbour. No problemo.

I'm just glad we don't have landlines so much anymore. I remember the stress of being a teenager and some unwanted guy calling on the landline.

The ringing would go right through me.

I never answer the door to unknown callers. I consider it the height of rudeness to rock up at someone’s door and expect them to speak to you. It’s nothing to do with anxiety and everything to do with choosing who I want coming to my home. If they want to see me, they can make an appointment.

Get a video doorbell, then you can view who it is before you decide whether to open it or not.

I am tempted to stop answering unless I know I have a delivery coming after a couple of weeks ago when three separate lots of irritating people came trying to sell stuff. Really annoying if you work from home and it interrupts you in the middle of something.

OP- you sound perfectly reasonable to me.
You have explained that it's only the unknown callers that you avoid.
I was the same when I lived alone, and I wouldn't worry about other peoples opinion... what's good for them, ain't necessarily good for you.
Same with phone calls where I don't recognise the number.
IF the call was important, they can leave a voicemail.
Please just do what make you feel safe and happy.
You're not breaking any laws.
You take care of you....

@AutumnLeaves24 Exactly, they're more likely to get drowned in drool than torn apart 🤣

If it’s during the day, and you don’t think it’s a ‘door knocker’ just answer. If it is a salesman, give a quick ‘no thank you’ and shut the door. And dont feel bad for doing it.

@ twangy. I dog sit & regularly one large Labrador, he is as soft as clarts, but he has a big bark if you give him the secret command, then give him another spoken command. so you look well in control when he sits right next to you quietly with a toothy bitching resting face. It's great at the door & on walks if you feel a little unnerved.

they don't know their only risk is being licked to death.