Friend barely speaking at mealtimes on holiday?

Double post - deleted.

I completely agree! This thread seems to have brought out those with poor social skills.

I have been away with many different friends, on holidays and prolonged months of travelling and have never experienced silence at meal times to the extent you have described. She sounds painfully lacking in self awareness. I would be wondering if she had any underlying anxiety issues around food. I would perhaps broach the subject again during the day when things are feeling more normal, in a sensitive way to try to avoid her becoming defensive. As an adult the onus is on her to communicate with you if she would prefer to eat separately, and/or to reassure you that she just needs some quiet time. Most people would feel awkward and uncomfortable in this situation. I hope your next trip is with someone more on your wavelength OP!

She's fightings demons and has developed an Eating Disorder ( psychlogiçal illness) you know nothing about. Human beings are complex beings, we cant all live like a soap opera. Lives change, things change people. Have some Mercy.

As she lives alone her social batteries might need a quick recharge
It's different when catching up with a friend at home
I live alone very happily, and would find 24/7 company tiring

Couldn’t imagine this, all my friends are chatty and I’ve been away with them and we chat non stop about various topics, laughing, making jokes sometimes serious chat as well. How odd of your friend. I would go mad.

Are you taking every meal together? Would she like to earmark a day, or a half day, for you to each go off and do your own thing? Definitely get a magazine or something to read at the table, or write postcards or something.

I'd find that awkward but would just keep making conversation. Asking questions, and talking about my own things. I love to chat a lot when eating out. It means I do eat very slowly though.
I don't really know what you can do other than keep the chat going and engage her.
Some people are quieter than others for sure. But hopefully you can find a way round it.

I find it difficult because I find silence at meals difficult. I don't mind the occasional lull but it makes me feel like we're not getting along and we haven't fallen out or anything

It might be more a you problem than a her problem. Sometimes you just don’t want to talk like in the same way you like to talk. Just try and relax at mealtimes and not over think it so much

Why do some people need to be talking all the time? I love food and when eating it's nice to just concentrate on that. They're with each other 24/7 like a pp said half an hour of nor saying much is surely manageable.

I went on holiday with the mother in law once, lovely lady but talks so much , sometimes I'd pretend to be asleep 😴 just to get a break from it 🙈🤣

Just say 'I've noticed you like to be quiet at mealtimes. I'm going to go on my phone/read my book so you can enjoy your meal'

It sounds like she just needs some quiet and doesn’t feel chatty.

Sometimes when I’m really tired (often the case on holiday as my body & mind finally get a break!) I just find conversation exhausting.

id try to just enjoy her company without expecting too much.

You're probably pissing her off. Perhaps you haven't done anything but living in close quarters all week can make you annoyed with the other person. I struggle with friend holidays for that reason tbh.

Just let the poor woman eat in peace.

you started a thread about going on holiday late october / november… alone

So it was a last minute addition that she joined?

Why do people want you to choke when they are eating by yabbering away.
I don't take any questions at meal times as I tell folks LOOK; I only ask to be left alone to eat quietly 20mins out of 24hrs.
Breakfast 5 mins
Lunch 5 mins
Dinner 10 mins
WTF is so important that can't wait. Honestly allow people to chew and eat and digest their food in peace.

youre on weight loss injections op…. i’m surprised you’re eating at all from what i have read on mumsnet!

Not strange in the slightest.

Never heard anything like this before

utterly incompatible holiday makers
no right or wrong

Then do you ever go out to dinner with friends? Or away with them?

I have been on holiday with lots of different friends over the years

I don't think I've ever eaten in silence with them

I find the thought quite odd

Sounds tedious

Bring a books or magazine. Or ask if she minds if you leave her to it and go off and do something else.

If she's normal chatty and happy other than meal times I would ask her at a different time of day whether everything is OK.

Perhaps she'd like to spend a bit of time separately or to eat in the room occasionally or she just wants a bit of peace.

Hopefully if you are reassured there's nothing wrong you can just agree to take a book/scroll MN and enjoy the quiet.

It can be pretty full on holidaying with a friend and being together all the time.

Yanbu.

Weird thread. Why are people pretending this is normal?!

A woman who usually eats at a normal pace and has a friendly chat, is suddenly eating in silence other than odd comments about a picture.

This must feel quite uncomfortable and I'm not sure how I'd manage it.

How's it been today @CallyT ?