Would you be disappointed if your teenage daughters wore barely any clothes posing on social media

Me and my husband regularly express shock at what young girls are wearing around our local town, and we're both young and not prudes! My mam would have tanned my hide if I'd have worn the things they do or acted as they do on social media 😅

Yes mine is 16 going on 25 and I know I get judged! But she is lovely kind fun and gorgeous so going in huffing and puffing seems counter productive and relationship damaging. Also we get called an anti feminists as women can do what they want apparently.

My ds is 15 and practically all the girls in his year group do this and have been for at least the last year. Ds is completely bewildered by it, he won't follow any of them now -most of the boys don't. He doesn't understand why they want to do it. Apparently there are loads of dramatic arguments at school between the girls over their videos and photos, who didn't "like" whose, who left a nasty comment etc.. It's becoming a full time job for the pastoral team dealing with it all.

It’s pretty obvious why they do it they want boys to fancy them and girls to admire them and that’s what they see being admired in our culture. ‘Twas ever thus. I have sympathy with well meaning parents of teen girls because believe me it is HARD!!!

If they're over 18...let them do what they want.

It's possible to be bright, smart and driven and also post nearly nude pics on the internet.

It's a curious form of objectification to reduce your nieces in this way.

I recently watched “I am Ruth” with Kate Winslet and her daughter, apart from the brilliant acting, it was a hard watch about a teenager and social media. Highly recommend.

Not all other countries, I can assure you. I have friends and family from places including Greece, Spain, Portugal,Germany, Finland, France, India. They've all commented to me on the fact that British girls fo around "Half naked". They ask me why on earth they want to expose so much flesh.

English mums are funny about this dds friends mums from other countries (US/Brazil/Russia) have a “if you’ve got it flaunt it” mentality !

I'm all for girls wearing what they want and expressing themselves. I can't help finding it a bit depressing, though. You don't see teenage boys posing nearly naked in a sexual way or wearing clothes that accentuate their arses and crotches.
Why is it that girls want to do this and boys don't? That's what we need to ask ourselves.

I was recently at a Halloween party in a local town and I was shocked to see young girls of what looked like 14 and 15 in tiny hot pants and suspenders in the pretence of it being a Halloween costume. It’s worrying really.

Maybe they have listened to
Moira Rose on Schitts creek!

“Disappointed in myself as a parent” dear god!

Mine do this sometimes mid / late teen their mates all seem to. It’s posing about on beaches / in
pools rather than overtly sexual. I don’t love it but don’t chalk it up as a personal failure!

It’s part of a culture where young girls go to school with their arse cheeks on view. And twelve year olds pose and say sexy. And get their tongues and belly buttons pierced.

It’s not “cute outfits”

SO. MUCH. THIS. I'm a bit surprised at the Victorian attitudes to young women's clothes and bodies in this thread. I don't for one second think that these young women are in any way less high achieving just because they choose to pose in cute outfits on their socials. I just hope they keep a couple for posterity to remind them of their glory days when they're older, greyer and more affected by gravity 😂

This thread immediately brought to mind karen brady and her daughter.
Gorgeous looking girl who posts practically naked on social media. Career driven mum, clearly very clever and has done brilliantly.
I always wonder what she makes of her daughters career. Im sure she is very supportive on the outside, but she must be gutted on the inside.

My sister's children have done this since they were very early teens, and their accounts are not private. When I mentioned my concerns to my family, I was laughed and shouted at. (Well, called all sorts of names actually!) The internet is a dangerous place. My daughter barely even posts day to day photos on her private account, as she is very aware of the dangers, employers checking etc.

With respect, she knows what 'represents' her better than anyone else and is allowed to try different things.

How does your judgemental attitude help anyone?

I’d be disappointed and concerned. It’s a grim world out there and I don’t think they realise that a lot of the time.

Yes I would be extremely disappointed. Mostly in myself as a parent, as I'd feel I had failed to protect them from the influence of these awful trends and failed to encourage them to develop an actual personality.

It's one of the worst things I could imagine as a parent in terms of ways my kids might turn out. I would hate it.

I believe their choices are influenced by male gaze and what men tell them is attractive

Is that free choice? No one forces them to wear skimpy clothes, but we should look at the reasons why they make these decisions

I wouldn’t be disappointed but I’d definitely be worried.

Yes. Very important we keep referring to them as 'adult women' isn't it? Makes basement Bernard ogling them sound so much better than the equally correct 'teenagers' or 'school girls'. Men's desire to view the bodies of extremely young women doesn't trump the right of their mothers to have an opinion. To get them to explore what exactly is empowering to them in being leered at by men, the majority of whom would no doubt be sexually repulsive to the young women if they could see them. To ask them to explain what about this makes them feel powerful and special, given creepy men leer at women anyway and don't need them to be unique or go to effort.
No amount of attempts to belittle me with stupid names or accusations would make me a silent facilitator of men who wanted sexual gratification from viewing my teen daughter.