Staying with him after he sexted another woman

When you say you don’t think you’d find another man you love like him.

Did you not feel the same with your child’s father? But yet you feel in love again with this man even though his not worth your love.

What has her mental health got to do with it?

She thought he was single .
He didn't bother correcting her and happily was sexting her.
She responded thinking he was single.

But he didn't mean it/didn't know why he did it/decided it doesn't count because "crazy ex" ,🙄

You're only 18 months in and he's treating you like this. And I'm guessing he only fessed up because you found out.

OP previous threads show you're a single parent to a young child. Jesus wept. The poor children caught up in these tanged webs their parents weave.

Baby mum tricked him and they also have another child. It was a mistake though. Honestly.

He's just handed you a pile of red flags. Honestly OP, leave him and find someone you can trust.

You're making excuse after excuse for his terrible behaviour and blaming his ex for HIS actions. I bet she isn't 'mentally unstable' and he's keeping you away from her deliberately so you can't compare notes. I'd be interested to hear her side of this.

And that you're left looking after his kid with his (crazy) ex on his contact time 🙄

If you're genuine, you'll be back in a year or two with a baby with him, complaining he won't marry you, he's always out, suspected cheating etc.

OP, I’m sorry, but wake up for goodness sake.
Have some self respect and recognise that he is a scumbag who is giving you all the “it meant nothing, I only did it because insert pathetic excuse here…”

I really wonder how some women are so naive.

Ah so the typical mentally unstable unwell ex who’s his baby’s mum. Who doesn’t know you exist apparently that he sexts.

He claims she wants to split you up but she doesn’t know about you.

The baby’s mum who’s so unwell his gown for full custody right? No… hmmm

You’re 28 if you want children with a decent man don’t waste your time and fertile years with this arsehole. Wise up.

What was your childhood like op? Specifically the relationship with your father?

Perhaps I could have put things more gently. You only have his word for it that his ex is mentally ill. Either he is the sort of person to be sexting a mentally ill woman and thus causing her more damage, or he’s the sort of person to be sexting his ex and lying to you about her mental illness to keep you apart. Either way, he is not a good person.

You are being extremely naive. He is not a good guy at all, and if you stick with him he’ll be telling the next woman he’s keeping a secret from you all about how you’re his mentally ill ex who can’t accept it’s over while telling you that he’s faithful and you’re still playing happy families. He’s not the first guy to come up with the unstable ex girlfriend story, and he won’t be the last.

The obvious thing to do if you’re in doubt is to contact the ex yourself and arrange to meet her. I bet she’s nowhere near as crazy as he says. She may also believe that you’re the new crazy girlfriend he can’t easily break up from, if she knows you exist at all.

Please, for your own sake, see this as the massive red flag everyone is telling you it is. This man will make you miserable in the long run if you keep him around.

Obvious rage bait is obvious.

Having read all of your replies, I'm not sure what you're after from this thread?

'I truly think he is besotted with me - we spend so much time together and he said he sees me in his life for a long long time. It was just sex with her, I know for a fact he doesn’t love her - that’s why I am willing to let it slide. I just cant let go of him after all our happy times together - I’m involved in his child’s life too.'

I guarantee you that you will be the next one with mental health problems as he is in no way besotted with you!

If it wasn't so tragic it would be hilarious!

You're lined up to take care of his kid that's all.

I can't imagine why you think so little of yourself that you would put up with being treated like a doormat.

I promise you that he will NOT be faithful to you.

Hang on, he sexted her yet she's mentally unwell?! Got yourself a real catch there OP!

Oh OP you really can't be THAT naive.

He's totally playing you and you can't see it.

He's being vile about the mother of his child and I'd put money on her not being 'mental' (oldest trick in the book that men use to manipulate naive women 'my ex was mental').

Wake up and open your eyes. He doesn't love you, he's saying all this so he can still have sex with you. I'd lay odds that he's having sex with his ex as well. I would definitely get an STI check if I were you.

OP - what is this "mental illness" that his ex supposedly has?

Doesn't it sound like a convenient cover for him not to introduce you to eachother?

Stop loving him so much and start loving yourself a little bit more

You’ll be the “mentally unwell” ex he’s sexting soon enough, no doubt.

PS - many many people understand and have been through a similar situation. You need to have some will power and self respect

He sounds gross. Sexting another woman, taking advantage of his mentally unwell ex, lying to her and not telling her about his gf so she'd sext him...

This isn't exactly the start of a big romance. Why put up with this?

Hoping this is a troll post, if you’ve wrote all this out and not realised how naive and gullible you have been, there’s no helping you. Sorry

We do, because some of us have been there when we were young (or at least encountered men a fraction as bad as this). And we woke up and smelled the giant stinking rat, then ran.

You don't even have kids with him. Move on. No one is going to give you pity for letting some tosser walk all over you while you defend him!

Oh come on. Stop thinking he's protecting you. He doesn't want you to meet her as she'll tell you the truth about him. I doubt she's mentally unwell either.