To think this the most pointless, indulgent gap year possible

All gap years are a mixture of learning experiences, growing in independence, learning about other countries/cultures and a bit of self indulgence.

However each one will be tailored to the family’s budget. Hers is just a high budget one! No need to slum it if you don’t have to.

You are right OP - it’s a great big jolly rather than an enriching experience. And at age 42, I think I’d benefit from it greatly 😂

You’re not supposed to have funds for a gap year necessarily, you can do it cheaply! I didn’t do backpacking but went on a working holiday visa for 2 years, stayed for 3. I come for a v poor family, anything I saved was from my part time job when I was in my early twenties. I was absolutely broke for the first year but then I learned how to get on with it, managed money, worked in jobs I hated, took on a side hussle. I met the most amazing people and I’m glad I didn’t have mummy and daddy helping me through it. Just thought I’d offer this perspective as if your DD would like to travel, she definitely can. There’s always ways around money if you’re determined to do it especially at that age with no other commitments. I hope she gets to do it if she wants that.

It sounds amazing, no wonder you’re so jealous! I’d have loved to have had a gap year like this and would love to do any one of those things now. I hope she has a fantastic time 😁

Yes, it is indulgent and pointless, but so are lots of things people do. This is no worse than anyone else taking multiple, expensive holidays with no thought of the impact on the planet. It's no worse than a typical back-packing gap year.

If the parent are trying to present it that the DD is doing something worthwhile, I can see why this would be irritating, but the same would apply to back-packing.

There's nothing really wrong with having a year off while you are young enough to enjoy it and at a time when it's socially acceptable and wouldn't raise eyebrows with future employers, but unless the person is spending the year working, a gap year is nothing more than an extended holiday.

It sounds wonderful but it doesn't sound like a gap year. If she comes from a wealthy background, I don't see the issue but if doesn't I don't see the purpose of this trip.

Does this affect your life in any way whatsoever? Unlikely.

I get the impression you’re a bit jealous which isn’t a nice trait.

I would think she'll probably meet other young people from similar backgrounds, travelling under similar circumstances and they'll all have fun together.

Why on earth wouldn't she have? I had by that age as had most my friends. I know this will be a shock but a hell of a lot of teenagers at that age explore and investigate many forms of music, culture, art and literature.

My sixteen year old son is the same. They spend their school time reading texts interrogating them, why wouldn't they then go on to subjects that interest them or even more so to find out why it doesn't interest them.

It sounds like a very well thought out year. I would love my son to do something similar.

Get over it

Wow you are bitter! Why is it pointless - because it doesn’t meet a definition of a gap year that you have dreamed up? Why do you feel they need to justify how their daughter spends her time to you?

my goodness you have notions!

I reckon you’ve topped it with the most indulgent, pointless, unpleasant thread

Absolutely. You came home with a smattering of languages, a dose of the clap, and a lot of statuary for your Palladian mansion when Papa pegged it.

You say you have a problem with privilege, and that her parents grew up "average" rather than ultra rich, so I presume they've worked for the money they have and have afforded their child a lifestyle they probably didn't have growing up?

This makes it sound like 100% jealousy! Why shouldn't they spend their own money on "enriching" their daughter's life how they see fit? We all do it, as parents, to a certain degree, within our means.
For some, that will mean swimming lessons, for others, buying them a car, and for others, paying for an amazing year of travel.

There's really no need to be jealous or bitter about it

Life doesn't need a point at 17.

I'd rather my daughter does that trip and gets the benefits of booking flights and activities for herself than what I did - taking a few rustic backpack trips and getting into dangerous situations.

Don't let your jealousy show. It's not good for your daughters to pick up on it.

Wealthy people have done this kind of year long holiday for hundreds of years. Google “the grand tour”.

It’s just because going abroad became more affordable for the masses over the past 40 years that by comparison this now seems extravagant.

What exactly a meaningful gap year would be in your eyes? Scrabbing toilets in orphanage in Guatemala?

Admit it, you’re just jealous!! You sound so bitter in your post.
What an amazing year she’ll have, I think it sounds much more useful than the usual clichéd backpacking!

Who is her Dad?
Daddy's company?

Who is it with? PwC, EY, Deloitte, Deutsche Bank?

And how did she get it, given to her on a plate, because of her parents. That would break most protocols wouldn't it?

Doesn’t sound like she will ever need to worry about going out into “the real world” if she has been handed a million quid aged 18, and has a job lined up for her in Daddy’s company.

In a way this makes this whole thread even more insulting. The child who's business you're slapping on the internet is more your dh's friend than your own. You're risking this being identified and tarnishing not one of your longest friendships but your dh's. How does DH feel about this? DH's take on it sounds like he was trying to shut you up tbh so I'm guessing he'd be mortified.

Amazing that there's so much detail about the ins and outs of the rest of their lives, and yet you didn't research what university she is supposed to be going to...

What an amazing experience! Life is for living. Lucky girl.

p.s jealousy suits no-one OP