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AIBU?

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Who in this co parenting arrangement has more time off/has it easier?

160 replies

Grewnaxre · 02/11/2024 16:33

toddler lives with one parent. That parent works from home mostly with flexibility. They can take holiday and toddler is in full time nursery.

the other parent travels to see toddler at weekends (not local to other parent) and arrives at 9am Saturday and leaves after toddler gone to bed on Sunday. During this time the resident parent is not involved or is involved very little in parenting.

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Ouncesnow · 02/11/2024 16:39

About equal I’d say. One has every weekend easy and one has every week day evening to themselves plus none of the morning rush to get toddler ready.
This will flip as child gets older and more fun though. For a primary age kid the parent who has them at weekends will have the better deal.

Grewnaxre · 02/11/2024 16:39

@TickingAlongNicely so far it’s been like this every weekend for 1.5 years

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Snorlaxo · 02/11/2024 16:38

Resident parent has it harder unless the house is so large that toddler is unaware that resident parent is at home. Does resident parent so normal adult stuff like go out with friends etc alone ? Does NRP buy food, pay for entertainment, clean up mess like the dishes and do housework like child’s laundry at the weekend ? Do they take child to parties and go out with child at all times ?

Grewnaxre · 02/11/2024 16:38

JayEffSee · 02/11/2024 16:35

That's not really co-parenting, at least not according to my understanding.

I'd say co-parenting is when you are both taking an equal share.

Why do the parents live so far apart?

@JayEffSee so if it’s not equal who has it easier in your opinion?

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TeenToTwenties · 02/11/2024 16:38

One parent has 2 days full care and 5 evenings free.
The other does 5 or 6 mornings and evenings and has 2 free-ish full days.

The first parent has more flexibility in life but less truely free time.

LiarLiarKnickersAblaze · 02/11/2024 16:37

I would say the resident parent misses out on the ‘fun’ and chilled weekend time with toddler, and is stuck with the feeding/bathing/sleeping cycle. That’s hard. Props to them for keeping working.

JayEffSee · 02/11/2024 16:35

That's not really co-parenting, at least not according to my understanding.

I'd say co-parenting is when you are both taking an equal share.

Why do the parents live so far apart?

LiarLiarKnickersAblaze · 02/11/2024 16:35

Looks about equal. I say this because resident parent has the slog of the full week morning, evening and overnight.

Equally non-resident parent never gets weekends off.

Both equally hard.

TickingAlongNicely · 02/11/2024 16:35

Every weekend? Or some weekends?

Grewnaxre · 02/11/2024 16:33

Posted too soon!

non resident parent travels back to their home and works full time, finishes at 5pm.

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