Old friend randomly blocked me

Mine was school reunion page. We met up we both 51. I did feel silly made few attempts to meet again she seem really keen too. Left it to her then.. odd text thats it

Perhaps something traumatic happened to her in the time you were friends, she's moved on from that now but your contact triggered bad memories (as to which, no reason you should or would know, but this seems like a possibility to me).

I don’t think that means you’ve been blocked. It just shows she hasn’t opened the message. To no honest it won’t be personal, maybe her marriage is going through a rough patch/personal problems. Just give it time you might get a reply later down the line when you don’t expect it.

I worked in a supermarket 28 years ago. The lemon mousses never scanned properly so you had to key in the bar code number. I can still remember the number.

Lots of people really scraping the bottom of the barrel to find something mean to say! OP, if I were your friend I would be thrilled to hear from you- I love meeting up with old friends, and would happily have them over. It seems completely normal to me to get in touch with the mum and for her to give you contact info for her daughter. People on here are just desperate to find something to criticise...

As for why she didn't answer, it is probably something in her life right now, maybe a medical or relationship issue that is consuming her thoughts- perhaps something her mum doesn't even know about (as her mum thought she would be thrilled to hear from you). Try not to feel bad about it; I know it's hard, but this is probably nothing to do with you, just like the nastiness on mumsnet is nothing to do with you...

But she's probably not blocked you? Just read it at the top of her phone and swiped it away. You're probably in her archived messages. Or she deleted the chat. I do it all the time when I don't want to open something 🤣

Having said that, take the hint if she's not replied.

I think you need to analyse your feeling that she owes you her time. She doesn't want to respond further or meet up ..that's her perogative. You can only feel offended if you think this reflects on you personally and that she owes you the commitment of meeting up again

You said yourself you were not close friends. You didn't stay in touch.

This is not someone you know well at all and if she has kids or busy job or life problems then she is highly likely to think...she doesn't want yo start a friendship and doesn't feel the need to explain.

You don't need to take this personally at all. Just accept she doesn't need to give you her time.

You know where her bodies are buried! She is probably a very different person now and possibly cringes at anyone having memories of her wild(ish) youth and doesn’t particularly want to be reminded of them, or you telling people stuff she’s never discussed. I may be wrong but there are lots of reasons why people aren’t keen to revive the past that aren’t personal at all.

I wouldn't ring it as he doesn't live there anymore and if I wanted to talk to him I'd text him.

I can remember loads of numbers from years ago, but many people don’t have that good a memory and find it freaky that people remember small details from that far back. I’ve been called weirdo many times for having a good memory 🤣. I’m also assuming that despite the fact you remembered the number, you wouldn’t ring it? That’s kind of the point. Not only did she remember, but she actually rang the number as opposed to searching for her social media.

Dropping an old friend a ‘long time no speak, how’s life?’ message on FB or Insta is much less invasive and far more likely to get a positive response. They might still ignore you, but at least you haven’t rung their mum

I agree. A casual social media message is much less pressured and more relaxed. I’d be far more likely to reply to that than someone calling my mum and messaging me out of the blue. It feels a bit odd frankly. Why didn’t you contact her via SM?

Don't take this personally

This isn't about you its just that plenty of people feel overwhelmed keeping up with current friends. Nice as it would be...I just couldn't make time for someone I lost touch with 20 years ago. There are so many current friends I barely see enough

I remember my boyfriend's phone number from 1987. It's not that odd.

She's rude, you've done nothing wrong

If it had been me, I’d have probably been happy to hear from you, but to be honest, I can understand why she may be freaked out. You remembered her mum’s landline number from over 30 years ago and rang it. Some might find it endearing that you were remembering her fondly enough to memorise the number and actually contact her, but equally some people might think it’s rather odd.

Is it possible that she did things that you know about and she doesn't want people to know in her current life so she's panicked and blocked?
I openly admit I was a bit of a wild child in my 20s (nothing illegal) but I'm honest about it, however I know a friend of mine likes to pretend she has always been wholesome and angelic to anyone who didn't know us then 😂

You’ve been pretty resolutely ignoring everyone who asks whether you tried to find this woman on social media before you rang her mother. I assume this means you didn’t? May I ask why?

Dropping an old friend a ‘long time no speak, how’s life?’ message on FB or Insta is much less invasive and far more likely to get a positive response. They might still ignore you, but at least you haven’t rung their mum.

So do I.

I reached out to an old friend a couple of years ago when I was on holiday for my best friend's wedding. There were 3 of us who used to always hang around together when we were 17/18. one of them was the best man(I knew he was going to be but we hadn't seen each other in about 20 years). We got drunk on our first night there and we messaged this other friend with a really drunken photo saying look who I've found 😂.

We met up a few weeks later it was just like old times. Sometimes you have to take a chance.

I think this is lovely OP to reach out. Stuff those that say otherwise. You've done nothing wrong.

I'm genuinely not trying to be unkind but your irritated response of "no wonder so many people are lonely" is a tad petulant.

Just because she doesnt want to meet up with you doesnt mean she isnt a friendly person or hasn't got friends in her life or will suffer as a result. You are making this all about you when as I said, you have no idea what might be going on for her now. Timing is everything here- if she is going through a difficult time personally or health wise or with her kids, having someone from 20 years ago ask to go for coffee would make me feel kind of irritated and pressured. It's not personal to you, it entirely depends on how her life is right now and maybe she doesn't have the headspace to re-connect. Or, maybe she is suspicious why you suddenly want contact now after 20 years of not being bothered how she was...

I have a friend who blocks and ghosts people regularly. It's her coping strategy.

There could be many reasons she has done this. She might be risk averse due to her personal circumstances. She could be simply busy and not have the head space for a re emerging old friend. She might lead a v busy life and not have time or inclination to reminisce.

Let it go.

I think you completely innocently did what you thought was a spontaneous and kind thing. But it was a bit intrusive and probably appeared rather pushy from her POV.

So I don't think you per se are the reason she blocked you, but the way you went about it. Like others have said, why didn't you just use the usual social media routes?

Also, is there a chance that your life has turned out rather better than hers, and she just wanted to avoid an awkward comparison?

Hmmm...honestly I'd feel a bit weirded out if someone from decades ago phoned my mum on my old landline.

This. You may have had good intentions but clearly this person felt you overstepped the mark. It was the meeting for coffee suggestion that made her block you so its clear your approach was just too much and too intense.

You dont need to overthink this - thats on you.

One grey tick or two?
And can you see her profile picture (assuming she has one)?

I have read receipts turned off. Everyone stays grey.