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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder if you are against private schools…

657 replies

Unsrr · 02/11/2024 12:16

Why is this? As in against their existence?

I was brought up in a reasonably poor area and my education was not good. I sometimes went to the nearest private school for swimming lessons and remember being in awe of it. We have one dc now age 7 and can’t afford private but there is maybe a chance we could for secondary. I wouldn’t give it a second thought if we could make it work.

I have never felt private schools should disappear because surely that’s what we should be aspiring to? An education that is excellent (yes I know not all private schools are good and lots of state schools are better), isn’t that what we should aim for?

I feel sad that this country has now made it harder to access this education. What is the reason people are against private schools existing at all? I don’t think it can be jealousy, I think many people are genuinely opposed to it from an ideological perspective and I can’t understand it at all. Just interested really as there’s been so much talk about schools recently.

OP posts:
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whiteboardking · 05/11/2024 00:23

@iamtheblcksheep why such an extreme view? No state school good enough?!

CrabSignalArmy · 05/11/2024 00:08

ThePure · 04/11/2024 23:47

I can't get my head around being a governor of a school that I would not send my kids to. I mean that's quite a damning indictment of the effectiveness of the institution you are supposed to be a critical friend to isn't it?

I was also a governor for many years but of the state schools my kids actually attended. I can't imagine the head wanting my input if I simultaneously sent my kids private. How can you do that role whilst clearly not believing in state education I just don't get it.

I sort-of agree but (a) it can be difficult to get people to volunteer to be governors. Our church is supposed to supply 2 governors to the board of the local church secondary school and I was asked to do it. I said I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it because I was sending my own child to a private school and it would seem patronising. But the post went unfilled for months as they couldn't find anyone to do it. However (b) as governors aren't in control of the budget of their school I don't think it's an "indictment" for a governor not to choose it for their child. A school can be doing the very best that can reasonably be expected with the money available and still not be the best option for a particular child.

Whatjemimadid · 05/11/2024 00:07

I am against then because I believe all children deserve an equal decent education. In the last 14 years funding for state schools has dropped dramatically compared with private schools. Normal kids should not lose out because of this

Also, they teach how to play the game and make connections rather than teaching to be smart well rounded people. That was generally the case in my old job with mostly privately educated co workers. They knew how to get ahead but they weren't actually very smart. I was forever fixing their mistakes while they mocked me for going to a comp

Blaggoshpereish · 04/11/2024 23:50

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

🤮

ThePure · 04/11/2024 23:47

Hoppinggreen · 03/11/2024 22:04

Both my DC went to Private secondary and I really wish it hadn't been necessary. I wish all DC could get the education and overall school experience my kids did and I wish they could have got it without it costing us a fortune.
I am sure some State schools are good enough but the one we had available just isn't and I know this because I am a Governor there.
Of course we could have moved but we love our house and where we live and preferred to pay for Private school instead.
No regrets

I can't get my head around being a governor of a school that I would not send my kids to. I mean that's quite a damning indictment of the effectiveness of the institution you are supposed to be a critical friend to isn't it?

I was also a governor for many years but of the state schools my kids actually attended. I can't imagine the head wanting my input if I simultaneously sent my kids private. How can you do that role whilst clearly not believing in state education I just don't get it.

SleeplessInWherever · 04/11/2024 22:58

noworklifebalance · 04/11/2024 22:50

I presume you do not enrich your children’s lives in any other way - no instrument lessons, sports, trips to museums or theatre, no books at home or visits to the library, no cooking together, exploring cusines, visiting different parts of the UK or going abroad. Where do you stop?
Do they have a warm home, full stomachs, a quiet place to study, broadband, devices?

You already are part of the system that perpetuates inequality. We all are.

Edited

I would hope most of us can agree that all children have a right to warm homes, full stomachs AND decent education.

Visting libraries and museums isn’t a basic right, some of your other examples are. I would argue we don’t need to make sure all kids can go on a UK holiday do Cornwall - but we should ensure they’re all warm, fed and educated.

noworklifebalance · 04/11/2024 22:58

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

And do you donate the £20k/year/child you are saving plus the £7k/year/child you are costing the state to your children’s school and maybe other state schools*? Or are you just sponging off the state system and adding to an already stretched teacher’s workload?

*otherwise an inequality would then develop between your children’s school and the nearby state schools.

It’s hyperbole but just because you can afford it but chose not to use doesn’t make you better.

noworklifebalance · 04/11/2024 22:50

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

I presume you do not enrich your children’s lives in any other way - no instrument lessons, sports, trips to museums or theatre, no books at home or visits to the library, no cooking together, exploring cusines, visiting different parts of the UK or going abroad. Where do you stop?
Do they have a warm home, full stomachs, a quiet place to study, broadband, devices?

You already are part of the system that perpetuates inequality. We all are.

JudgeJ · 04/11/2024 20:54

I am absolutely opposed to private schools, it puts certain children at a significant advantage than other children just because mummy or daddy or rich grandparents etc can fork out an eye watering amount of money each year

Where do you want to stop though? My late OH spend ages helping our granddaughter to develop her reading, I spent some time this weekend talking to my grandson about a problem he was having with his Maths, my son-in-law almost ran private revision classes in his subject at half term. for his daughter and her boyfriend. Is the suggestion that able and caring family should not try to give their children an advantage? Shall we ban selling children's books because not all can afford them or bother to direct their resources in that direction?

DuoLingoStreak · 04/11/2024 20:45

Xenia · 04/11/2024 20:30

I support private schools. Hopefully the litigation will be won and Labour will not be able to go ahead. We save teh state a small fortune and have our children educated well which benefits the nation which relieving the state sector of the cost of 500,000 children a year.

Not commenting on private vs state but the reality is more complex than going private saves the state money.

Pupils = state funded income for schools. True.

However, there are many fixed costs to running a school. Whether the class has 24 or 30 students it’s still requires 1 x teacher. It requires the same building, utilities and lots of other overheads associated with it. So the variance between fixed and variable costs is less than you might think.

Schools are in deficit budget in some areas due to falling pupil rolls. This is either propped
up by the state or schools are having to scrimp in other areas because they still have high fixed overheads. An influx of some ‘private’ students will be the opposite of a burden. It will be funding/income that as a ratio makes fixed overheads more bearable.

Hoppinggreen · 04/11/2024 20:44

Singinginthespring · 04/11/2024 20:36

Agreed. What I meant was the teachers are no better at private. It’s the same standard of actual teachers. But nice to have one that has knowledge of the subject.

Id say the private school teacher turnover must be much lower as so many of the teachers are committed to staying until their kids leave the school (and they no longer need the staff discount).

But when they don't have to deal with disruptive behaviour, have small classes, excellent resources and parents who are generally engaged with their childs education its much easier to teach.
DDs GCSE History class had 10 kids in, DS's classes have between 15 and 20 tops.

Singinginthespring · 04/11/2024 20:36

noblegiraffe · 04/11/2024 16:11

And yet you still seem to think that the teaching at a state school and a private school will be the same.

Look at the teacher trainee recruitment figures below. They have been massively below target for years. What do you think this looks like on the ground?

In state schools there are many, many classes that don't have a permanent, qualified teacher. They will have an adult in the room for safeguarding reasons, but that doesn't mean it is someone who knows the class or the subject, or who is even a qualified teacher. It may be a different adult every week. This may even be for exam classes who are basically left to teach themselves the syllabus. At A-level there is a box on the UCAS form for extenuating circumstances where you can write, and I have had to write, that a student did not have a teacher for a significant proportion of the course and had to teach themselves. This is not unusual.

I would strongly, strongly doubt that this is the case in private schools, because if it is, what are the parents paying for?

Agreed. What I meant was the teachers are no better at private. It’s the same standard of actual teachers. But nice to have one that has knowledge of the subject.

Id say the private school teacher turnover must be much lower as so many of the teachers are committed to staying until their kids leave the school (and they no longer need the staff discount).

Singinginthespring · 04/11/2024 20:32

Hoppinggreen · 04/11/2024 20:31

Is your child at a failing State school?

London Oratory perhaps?

Singinginthespring · 04/11/2024 20:32

Blaggoshpereish · 04/11/2024 15:53

assessments can take years, many local SEN authorities won’t accept a private assessment. Make up every excuse and delay so that years pass before can get an ehcp even if child disability a confirmed medical diagnosis.

Local SEN at council likes to decide what child needs which seems to be exactly what every other SEN child needs.

often local education people (do question their qualifications …) turn the SEN into parenting “needs”

It’s the endless fighting your child’s corner. It’s so draining!!! You become such an expert in your child’s rights!

Hoppinggreen · 04/11/2024 20:31

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

Is your child at a failing State school?

Singinginthespring · 04/11/2024 20:30

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

So you’d put up with your child being kicked black and blue every day for your smug ‘perpetuating inequality’ values? I’d doubt it.

Xenia · 04/11/2024 20:30

I support private schools. Hopefully the litigation will be won and Labour will not be able to go ahead. We save teh state a small fortune and have our children educated well which benefits the nation which relieving the state sector of the cost of 500,000 children a year.

RhaenysRocks · 04/11/2024 20:29

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

But you might if your child had unmet needs in state. Do you really not understand that? Loads of us had no intention of beggaring ourselves to do this until our kids were utterly broken. Anyone who hand on heart would leave their child in a setting in which they were terrorised and then developed EBSA and didn't move them if they could is a bloody terrible parent in my view.

EalingLucy · 04/11/2024 20:29

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

Some, such as those with SEN, would struggle in mainstream but get more support in private schools. I’m not going to flame those who want to do that when they have zero support in traditional schools.

Drom · 04/11/2024 20:26

EalingLucy · 04/11/2024 19:56

Sad they are needed really. All education should be great. But don’t blame people who can afford them for picking the best for their child.

I do blame them. I can afford it, but wouldn’t consider sending DS private. To do so wpuld be participating in a system that perpetuates inequality.

LeopardPrintIsNeutral · 04/11/2024 20:01

Ednoreilojal · 02/11/2024 12:25

I think the general feeling is that all children should be entitled to a good education, not just those with rich parents. If there weren't private schools rich parents would have reason to support the state school system.

The same with grammar schools in areas which have them, the reason people are so desperate to get kids into grammar schools is because the non grammars have a bad reputation. This is largely down to the fact that the top 20 per cent of achievers go to the grammars. Which includes large proportion of better off families who can afford tutoring for 11 plus and to support their kids with educational extra curricular activities.

In an ideal world, all schools would be good and everyone would go to their closest school.

This

EalingLucy · 04/11/2024 19:56

Sad they are needed really. All education should be great. But don’t blame people who can afford them for picking the best for their child.

DuoLingoStreak · 04/11/2024 19:53

NothingMatterss · 04/11/2024 19:46

They tend to be better than state maintained ones (primary level). I don’t know about secondary quality for academy yet.

I think it’s variable (state school governor).

Philosophically I’m conflicted about MATs. On the one hand curriculum and policy autonomy is good and poor support from the LA gives them buying power and other economies of scale etc. However, the size of some MATs are akin to publicly listed companies yet trustees remain largely volunteers who are unable to adequately challenge. There’s an issue with span of control.

NothingMatterss · 04/11/2024 19:46

DuoLingoStreak · 04/11/2024 19:12

In fact it was a government initiate to get as many schools into a MAT (multi-academy trust) as possible. I lose track of where that is these days.

Edited

They tend to be better than state maintained ones (primary level). I don’t know about secondary quality for academy yet.

Bushmillsbabe · 04/11/2024 19:21

Blaggoshpereish · 04/11/2024 15:53

assessments can take years, many local SEN authorities won’t accept a private assessment. Make up every excuse and delay so that years pass before can get an ehcp even if child disability a confirmed medical diagnosis.

Local SEN at council likes to decide what child needs which seems to be exactly what every other SEN child needs.

often local education people (do question their qualifications …) turn the SEN into parenting “needs”

That is a huge issue, those deciding on placements often have very limited professional knowledge. As a health professional I write reports for ehcps, and you can see they just pull random phrases from each professionals report which looses context and ends up with the report making no sense.