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AIBU?

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Original poster

My son's barber's tattoo

157 replies

sunshineandskyscrapers · 01/11/2024 23:25

I took DS (9) to the barber's this afternoon. It's a shop we've used a few times before, now that he's pretty much aged out of the designated kiddy hairdresser, which is also a bit of a drive away, whereas this one is local and you can usually book in the day before. The shop is part of a chain. We've booked in with the two female barbers there previously but they were already booked up for today so I booked in with a guy. First time a man's cut my son's hair but he seemed perfectly lovely and took his time to do a really nice job on my son's hair.

So the problem I have is that the barber was wearing shorts showing a large tattoo of Andrew Tate on his lower leg. This had no impact on my son's experience at all, but made me feel uneasy that my son was in the company of a man who chooses to act as a human billboard for a misogynistic arsehole in his place of work, and worrying that this man can sport this tattoo so overtly with nobody batting an eyelid. And by paying for his services I am supporting him. I might be more sensitive to this today, as this morning I had a conversation with a colleague whose family member is in a coercive relationships with an Andrew Tate supporter and the details of this were really unpleasant.

I am not sure what my AIBU is. I won't book in with this barber again, but not sure if I should also avoid the whole shop due to their seeming acceptance of the casual misogyny. Is this just what barber shops are like or is this likely to be a one-off arsehole?

Also I feel confused. Surely any woman is going to run a mile from any man who supports Andrew Tate to the extent that he has him tattooed on his leg. Or as an Andrew Tate supporter is he so confident in his abilities to control and abuse women that he doesn't feel the badge of honour will hamper his efforts? I feel slightly regretful that I didn't ask him.

OP posts:
oldcow44 · 02/11/2024 11:05

Seriously79 · 02/11/2024 10:57

I'm on the fence with this.

Yes - he's an absolute prick, and I wouldn't want to support anyone who supports him.

But, where does this stop?

If someone has a tattoo of a spider/ dolphin/ butterfly and you (not 'you' a person) doesn't like that, but would you not use their services?

I know I'm being flip, and I want to reiterate Andrew Tate is a twat!

Completely incomparable.
You can dislike tattoos, find them chavvy or whatever and it boils down to personal taste.
Having a tattoo of someone so disgusting is sending a message about the persons morals and values. Andrew Tate hates women so does that mean the barber does too? Certainly suggests so.
It's similar to those who have swastikas tattooed on them. Says a lot about their views and I doubt it would be allowed to be on view in any job role.
Op you're not unreasonable to feel ugh about it. I think I would have had to say something casually even just 'nice tattoo' with a massive eye roll. And I'd complain to the barbers too. If he's going to have something so offensive tattooed on him he should at least cover it up.

Seriously79 · 02/11/2024 10:57

I'm on the fence with this.

Yes - he's an absolute prick, and I wouldn't want to support anyone who supports him.

But, where does this stop?

If someone has a tattoo of a spider/ dolphin/ butterfly and you (not 'you' a person) doesn't like that, but would you not use their services?

I know I'm being flip, and I want to reiterate Andrew Tate is a twat!

Indianajet · 02/11/2024 10:55

I think I might have just asked him who it was? And then got into an argument with him, so probably not a good idea! I certainly wouldn't want to have any dealings with anyone supporting Andrew Tate.
As for shorts, my adult son wears them all year round because he prefers them - has to be below freezing for him to cover up, he just doesn't feel the cold.

1dayatatime · 02/11/2024 10:49

There should be zero tolerance for those people expressing intolerant right wing views.

KnittedMoon · 02/11/2024 10:49

ThatWarmJadeSeal · 02/11/2024 08:03

Andrew Tate would find that disturbing that a dude has his face tattooed on him

Every cloud.

Was this the tattoo?

My son's barber's tattoo
ABirdsEyeView · 02/11/2024 10:41

I remember when MN posters were threatening to leave their spouses/end 20 year friendships if said spouse/mate voted for Brexit or took a different view on the Scottish referendum or voted Tory. Yet somehow the OP is bonkers because she doesn't want to financially support a man who aligns with a rapist and people trafficker? And doesn't want to see this alignment openly displayed in a public facing workplace?

Lots of businesses/professions ask employees to cover tattoos or not to be openly political in the workplace.

JaneJeffer · 02/11/2024 10:40

sunshineandskyscrapers · 02/11/2024 08:53

Thanks for all the replies. This was really about me not wanting to financially support someone who is proud to show off an Andrew Tate tattoo, rather than a feeling that my son may have become a mysoginist by osmosis.

Thanks to those who suggest I raise it with the company. I' emailed them late last night, saying that he'd done a good job and asking if the tattoo is who I think it is as that would affect whether I return. I doubt I'll get a response before Monday but I can keep you posted.

On tenterhooks here

MartinCrieffsLemon · 02/11/2024 10:32

If the head office bothers to reply at all, they will only give some generic reassurance that they take things seriously blah blah blah. I doubt they'll email and say "we asked Steve and he confirmed it's Andrew Tate and then went on a tirade about women so we've fired him and alerted all barber's shops not to hire him again".
Bloke will probably have to wear trousers to work now in case anyone else thinks his tribute to the guy from JLS is actually him openly branding himself as a misogynist.
And you would be better never showing your face there again anyway

5foot5 · 02/11/2024 10:19

TrishM80 · 02/11/2024 02:39

What about women wearing short skirts in November?

Show quote history

Seems impractical if the weather is cold. Why wouldn't you want to wrap up warm? But then I am getting on so that might influence my opinion!

I think it is different though. Just my personal observation of the sort of men who wear shorts when it is freezing cold tend to be show offs.

TheNicelyDone · 02/11/2024 09:39

Delphiniumandlupins · 02/11/2024 00:21

I'm not sure how I would tackle the conversation but I would want to let the business know why I wasn't coming back. Even if the tattoo was covered you don't want a man like that around your DS

Yes OP try to get the man fired. It's the only way when you disagree with someone.
In fact you should blackball him with all potential employers too...you can't have him earning a living!!!

😅

Edingril · 02/11/2024 09:05

sunshineandskyscrapers · 02/11/2024 08:59

If I'm wrong about who it is, and it turns out to be his uncle Pete, I think it's still better that he knows that the likeness is making him look like misogynistic arsehole.

And this thread makes you look unhinged so 6 of one

PreBlendOils · 02/11/2024 09:02

I bet it was Pitbull. Or Jeff Bezos.

Original poster
sunshineandskyscrapers · 02/11/2024 08:59

If I'm wrong about who it is, and it turns out to be his uncle Pete, I think it's still better that he knows that the likeness is making him look like misogynistic arsehole.

OP posts:
housethatbuiltme · 02/11/2024 08:55

It will be very awkward when you complain about a suspected offensive tattoo and it turns out to be a loving memorial to recently tragically deceased father etc... who you just A) pointed out is badly done and not recognizable & B) accused him of being an incel.

ClaredeBear · 02/11/2024 08:53

I wouldn't be supporting a business that proudly displays their allegiance with Andrew Tate, if that's who it is. Your son will grow up and see all sorts of things and you'll teach him right from wrong so he'll be fine but you need to set an example, whether he's aware of it or not right now. This isn't a football team he's choosing. He's choosing misogyny and he works in an industry where he's potentially able to influence young guys all day long. It's a no from me.

Original poster
sunshineandskyscrapers · 02/11/2024 08:53

Thanks for all the replies. This was really about me not wanting to financially support someone who is proud to show off an Andrew Tate tattoo, rather than a feeling that my son may have become a mysoginist by osmosis.

Thanks to those who suggest I raise it with the company. I' emailed them late last night, saying that he'd done a good job and asking if the tattoo is who I think it is as that would affect whether I return. I doubt I'll get a response before Monday but I can keep you posted.

OP posts:
Forgottenwhatitwas · 02/11/2024 08:51

I wouldn't be going back personally

Re the shorts - it's been unseasonably warm, around 14° here all week and ds has been wearing shorts...is he an exhibitionist too or does that only apply to adults?

Autumnalsun · 02/11/2024 08:46

I wouldn’t give anyone my business that wore any sort of right wing tattoo.

But I am shocked that someone would have a tattoo of A.T
Most right wing tattoos are symbols.

Perhaps the man is gay as well as a misogynist.

Shiningout · 02/11/2024 08:42

Are you sure it's not just a portrait of a brother or something who died, I mean I just can't believe someone would be showing off an Andrew tate tattoo tbh.

Startingagainandagain · 02/11/2024 08:41

There is nothing funny about a man supporting Andrew Tate, a sexist/misogynist vile man who is accused of rape and sex trafficking, to the point where he feels the need to tattoo his likeness on his body.

The OP is completely right to be disturbed by this and not to want to use a barber that this it is OK to display that type of tattoos while dealing with the general public and I would not want to give them my money.

Find somewhere else OP for your son's haircut and if this place part of the chain of barbers I would complain to their head office.

I am actually shocked that people on this thread seem to think the OP's reaction is over the top.

1WanderingWomble · 02/11/2024 08:24

I'm not sure why people are finding the thread so funny - is it supposedly 'pearl clutching' to be bothered about this? YANBU OP, Tate is vile beyond belief. Obviously it doesn’t affect your son or his haircut but I would feel the same.

MyCatHatesSandals · 02/11/2024 08:21

If we had the ability to know everyone else's less desirable beliefs, would we have anyone left to interact with at all?

PiggieWig · 02/11/2024 08:14

I would be able resist booking back in and asking him. Possibly pretending I had no idea who it was.

ThatWarmJadeSeal · 02/11/2024 08:03

Andrew Tate would find that disturbing that a dude has his face tattooed on him

redalex261 · 02/11/2024 08:02

is this real? I cannot believe people are genuinely saying they wouldn't use a retail service because they object to the views of the person who may (or may not) be tattooed on the lower leg of a staff member!

Andrew Tate is a wicked man, no doubt, and very open about it.

I think tattoos are hideous, but lots love them.

Shorts in winter? Each to their own.

The guy is barbering a 9 yo child's hair. Who couldn't even see the bloody tattoo during the procedure. I don't imagine the conversation between them veered into dodgy territory. Get over yourself. Not everyone's views have to align with yours. If someone says something you think is wrong you are free to challenge them on it - you may make them think.