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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My son's barber's tattoo

157 replies

sunshineandskyscrapers · 01/11/2024 23:25

I took DS (9) to the barber's this afternoon. It's a shop we've used a few times before, now that he's pretty much aged out of the designated kiddy hairdresser, which is also a bit of a drive away, whereas this one is local and you can usually book in the day before. The shop is part of a chain. We've booked in with the two female barbers there previously but they were already booked up for today so I booked in with a guy. First time a man's cut my son's hair but he seemed perfectly lovely and took his time to do a really nice job on my son's hair.

So the problem I have is that the barber was wearing shorts showing a large tattoo of Andrew Tate on his lower leg. This had no impact on my son's experience at all, but made me feel uneasy that my son was in the company of a man who chooses to act as a human billboard for a misogynistic arsehole in his place of work, and worrying that this man can sport this tattoo so overtly with nobody batting an eyelid. And by paying for his services I am supporting him. I might be more sensitive to this today, as this morning I had a conversation with a colleague whose family member is in a coercive relationships with an Andrew Tate supporter and the details of this were really unpleasant.

I am not sure what my AIBU is. I won't book in with this barber again, but not sure if I should also avoid the whole shop due to their seeming acceptance of the casual misogyny. Is this just what barber shops are like or is this likely to be a one-off arsehole?

Also I feel confused. Surely any woman is going to run a mile from any man who supports Andrew Tate to the extent that he has him tattooed on his leg. Or as an Andrew Tate supporter is he so confident in his abilities to control and abuse women that he doesn't feel the badge of honour will hamper his efforts? I feel slightly regretful that I didn't ask him.

OP posts:
MartinCrieffsLemon · 02/11/2024 20:08

Allfur · 02/11/2024 19:53

Yeah i think its peculiar

That's a you problem

Allfur · 02/11/2024 19:53

MartinCrieffsLemon · 02/11/2024 19:47

Loads of men have tattoos of film characters.
Others of family members

Wtf

Yeah i think its peculiar

MartinCrieffsLemon · 02/11/2024 19:47

Allfur · 02/11/2024 18:34

Any man who has a tattoo of another man on his body is dubious, let alone andrew bloody tate

Loads of men have tattoos of film characters.
Others of family members

Wtf

Allfur · 02/11/2024 18:34

Any man who has a tattoo of another man on his body is dubious, let alone andrew bloody tate

Milkand2sugarsplease · 02/11/2024 18:28

You're gonna have to go back at least once more to get the pic to upload to mn so it can be fully determined whether you're allowed to go back a third time.....

pinkyredrose · 02/11/2024 18:18

Since I had almost half an hour to look at this tattoo and compare it to images on my phone, I found plenty of Andrew Tate photos of him smoking a cigar

😂

pinkyredrose · 02/11/2024 18:16

Maybe it was of his boyfriend who looks like Andrew Tate?

housethatbuiltme · 02/11/2024 18:14

oldcow44 · 02/11/2024 12:57

To have something tattooed on your body generally means you feel quite strongly about it. Actively showing off a tattoo like this sends a clear message about what the man believes. And he probably believes it quite passionately to have it tattooed on him. He clearly supports the vile, abusive misogyny that Tate the twat peddles. And I wouldn't want to support someone who thinks like that.

For those saying it's only a tattoo, don't complain and get the poor chap fired....would you feel the same if someone had a swastika tattooed on their forehead? Would you want them cutting your kids hair or doing your nails or coming round to your house to change a radiator or any other paid job? I bloody wouldn't. And I'd tell them why.

Not really.

I have personal meaningful tattoos of the names of people I love... I have been told this is 'tacky' to have names by non other that tattoo artist themselves. I have had to justify what I want on my body and reassure them I won't 'divorce' my child.

I also however know people who have had used tampons tattooed on them for a laugh and thats deemed absoloutly fine. Most tattoo artist have tonnes of pre-made flash of random things and 'funny' thing and often off discounts on 'art piece' portraits they want to do that good tattooist will have people lining up round the block for not because they desperately obsessed with Marilyn Monroe or Freddie Kruger etc... but because they want a really well done tattoo by an artist.

You just have to watch tattoo reality shows to see people will even get joke Hitler tattoo's on them for 'shock value' rather than because they have anything to do with Nazi beliefs.

LordGribeau · 02/11/2024 13:24

I was going to say YABU, it's his body etc. But actually that would really put me off. I wouldn't be back.

oldcow44 · 02/11/2024 13:13

LifeExperience · 02/11/2024 13:10

Not going to him again is perfectly fine, but trying to get him fired is not. For one thing, what if the tattoo is not Tate?

If it's not Tate then he'd explain that surely. If it is Tate I don't think he should be working with the public with something like that on show.

LifeExperience · 02/11/2024 13:10

Not going to him again is perfectly fine, but trying to get him fired is not. For one thing, what if the tattoo is not Tate?

FieldInWhichFucksAreGrownIsBarren · 02/11/2024 13:07

Do you know what? I actually don't think I know what the misogynistic arsehole actually looks like, I'd have to Google him (which is not happening) so pretty sure I'd have no idea if he was a tattoo on someone.

Branleuse · 02/11/2024 13:04

I wouldn't go back. I might even mention it in a review.

Teaortea · 02/11/2024 13:00

OnSecondThoughts · 02/11/2024 00:08

Wearing shorts just to show off your Andrew Tate tattoo is even worse.

Exactly, not really shorts weather atm assuming it's in the UK

oldcow44 · 02/11/2024 12:57

To have something tattooed on your body generally means you feel quite strongly about it. Actively showing off a tattoo like this sends a clear message about what the man believes. And he probably believes it quite passionately to have it tattooed on him. He clearly supports the vile, abusive misogyny that Tate the twat peddles. And I wouldn't want to support someone who thinks like that.

For those saying it's only a tattoo, don't complain and get the poor chap fired....would you feel the same if someone had a swastika tattooed on their forehead? Would you want them cutting your kids hair or doing your nails or coming round to your house to change a radiator or any other paid job? I bloody wouldn't. And I'd tell them why.

AlexaSetATimer · 02/11/2024 12:18

Startingagainandagain · 02/11/2024 08:41

There is nothing funny about a man supporting Andrew Tate, a sexist/misogynist vile man who is accused of rape and sex trafficking, to the point where he feels the need to tattoo his likeness on his body.

The OP is completely right to be disturbed by this and not to want to use a barber that this it is OK to display that type of tattoos while dealing with the general public and I would not want to give them my money.

Find somewhere else OP for your son's haircut and if this place part of the chain of barbers I would complain to their head office.

I am actually shocked that people on this thread seem to think the OP's reaction is over the top.

I agree.

I wouldn't want to give a single penny to a man who supports that vile disgusting creep.

And I would also be writing to let them know why I wouldn't be back.

SleepToad · 02/11/2024 11:42

I'm male. Last year I had a look at what Andrew Tate says...some is very good advice to young men. "If a girl isn't interested move on, don't pursue her". Then you hear what he says about protecting women...ok a bit old fashioned but yes traditionally males took a protective role.

Then he described women as property...WTF.

And this within 10 minutes of me looking into his views!

Timetoread · 02/11/2024 11:30

If only it was that easy to spot all Andre Tate followers...

MrsSkylerWhite · 02/11/2024 11:26

Go somewhere else.

Maria1979 · 02/11/2024 11:26

It sounds really weird for a barber to have a Tate tatoo. Can you please tell him that you heard a clip where Tate dictated that all male hairdressers were fagots. Not true to my knowledge but it seems like something he could say.

MartinCrieffsLemon · 02/11/2024 11:19

Seriously79 · 02/11/2024 10:57

I'm on the fence with this.

Yes - he's an absolute prick, and I wouldn't want to support anyone who supports him.

But, where does this stop?

If someone has a tattoo of a spider/ dolphin/ butterfly and you (not 'you' a person) doesn't like that, but would you not use their services?

I know I'm being flip, and I want to reiterate Andrew Tate is a twat!

A better comparison would be:
They have a religious symbol tattooed, I don't agree with that religion/all religion so I don't want them near my child
We are an Arsenal household but they have a Liverpool tattoo. (Football is.. stupidly competitive like this)
They have Harry Potter tattoos so they support JKR and are therefore a massive transphobe
They have horror tattoos so must be a warped person because they enjoy that sort of thing

Andrew Tate would probably fall under the category of "offensive tattoos which should be covered" like naked people, swearing etc. But the most that will happen is he will be told to make sure its covered (if it even is Andrew Tate)

MissTrip82 · 02/11/2024 11:17

redalex261 · 02/11/2024 08:02

is this real? I cannot believe people are genuinely saying they wouldn't use a retail service because they object to the views of the person who may (or may not) be tattooed on the lower leg of a staff member!

Andrew Tate is a wicked man, no doubt, and very open about it.

I think tattoos are hideous, but lots love them.

Shorts in winter? Each to their own.

The guy is barbering a 9 yo child's hair. Who couldn't even see the bloody tattoo during the procedure. I don't imagine the conversation between them veered into dodgy territory. Get over yourself. Not everyone's views have to align with yours. If someone says something you think is wrong you are free to challenge them on it - you may make them think.

You’re also free not to hand over your money to overt misogynists.

Nobody has suggested everyone’s views need to align. But you know that.

ABirdsEyeView · 02/11/2024 11:15

I certainly believe in a person's right to have whatever they want tattooed on their own body - freedom of speech means hearing/seeing things we personally find offensive because of the wider principle. And actually, I'd rather views were openly expressed in people's private lives, even when they are offensive, because I prefer to know who I'm dealing with. But workplaces are different. No one needs to be discussing or advertising their support of rape, at work!

To me the test is whether you'd want your child's school teacher to be sporting such a thing at work. If not, then no one should.

Doggymummar · 02/11/2024 11:14

As if, too much vino?

kittensinthekitchen · 02/11/2024 11:12

5foot5 · 02/11/2024 10:19

Seems impractical if the weather is cold. Why wouldn't you want to wrap up warm? But then I am getting on so that might influence my opinion!

I think it is different though. Just my personal observation of the sort of men who wear shorts when it is freezing cold tend to be show offs.

Maybe it's one of those new-fangled indoor barber shops!