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MIL only one not to say my baby looks like me

215 replies

TheAquaFawn · 01/11/2024 22:43

My MIL never says my baby looks like me. Everyone else - friends, family, strangers, says he’s the spit of me but I noticed she stays quiet and only comments that he looks like her son / my DH and at a push, that he looks like both of us. It’s starting to annoy me, and wonder whether it’s a slight at me, am I being silly? DH isn’t insecure at all that people say he looks more like me and joins in.

OP posts:
Cynic17 · 01/11/2024 22:51

All babies look like Winston Churchill anyway. Or a potato! What your MIL says is irrelevant, and not worth bothering about.

cadburyegg · 01/11/2024 22:50

Maybe she genuinely doesn't see the resemblance. I think it's quite common to mainly recognise features from your side of the family. I recognise a lot of my own features on my children, less so their dad's side.

Cyclistmumgrandma · 01/11/2024 22:50

I think my granddaughter looks like my son. I can't see the resemblance to my daughter in law that others see. I knew my son as a baby, so I see those resemblances, my daughter in law's parents knew her as a baby so, unsurprisingly, they see where she looks like her mum.

eddiemairswife · 01/11/2024 22:50

All babies look like Churchill.

Hankunamatata · 01/11/2024 22:49

It's like your looking for something to get annoyed at mil for.

SensibleSigma · 01/11/2024 22:49

Can you not let the woman enjoy her grandchild- her little boy’s little boy- without getting offended? This one isn’t about you, it’s about her connection to the baby. You want that. You want to cherish it. That connection makes people move heaven and earth to protect the baby. It’s a survival trait.

HermoinePotter · 01/11/2024 22:48

I personally can never see the resemblance of a baby to a particular parent because they’re a baby.

only comments that he looks like her son / my DH and at a push, that he looks like both of us

She’s clearly not wanting to upset anyone. She never seen you as a baby and can’t/won’t comment. I never get the angst about who a baby looks like, they’re individual little human beings.

Mooburger · 01/11/2024 22:48

Maybe she just thinks your baby looks like OH did as a baby. I think you are massively overthinking it though, people tend to just sat it for something to say and really it doesn't matter at all.

HalloweenYey · 01/11/2024 22:48

DS1 is 14 and mil still hasn't said he looks like me!! It's always that he looks like DH! She's been that way since DS1 was born! I think she genuinely sees her own genes in him and can't see the other side of the family! Personally, I think he looks more like me than DH!! but ultimately, it does not matter AT ALL!!!

Don't worry about it OP! ;)

frostywhite · 01/11/2024 22:47

You are being silly, but understandable given you're presumably a new mum and that does weird things to the best of us! My in-laws used to do this all the time - they'd literally drag up the names of the most random people DH is vaguely related to to say our children look like. "Oh I think he's really got the look of Great Aunt Griselda's second cousin John - do you remember him?"

My kids are the spitting image of me... it seems to really annoy them for some reason 🤣 I just laugh about it now.

Bex5490 · 01/11/2024 22:46

Maybe she just doesn't think the baby looks like you...

I remember just after giving birth I was honestly offended by everything, but as someone out the other side of the fog, I can tell you that this is NOT offensive behaviour!

Congrats on the baby 🤎

Chowtime · 01/11/2024 22:46

Maybe she secretly dislikes you.

MyOtherCarisAVauxhallZafira · 01/11/2024 22:45

If my MIL said DS looked like me I'd tell her she was lying, he has DHs face.
Why does it matter? She probably sees more of her son in him because she's so familiar with how his features were as a child

AgainandagainandagainSS · 01/11/2024 22:45

Why does it matter?

Pandasnacks · 01/11/2024 22:43

Yeah you are being silly