MIL only one not to say my baby looks like me

I had the same midwife throughout my pregnancy and I have known her a long time, so I knew her well and she knew i would find it funny (the stars aligned and she was doing a hospital shift the day I had DD). We are also both originate from a country that can be blunt... and in our native language, it's not quite as offensive as in English.

Come to think of it, DH can look a bit potatoey (in the most affectionate way) 🤣 (I missed out the word 'most', clearly!)

Are you really trying to say your DH looks like Elton or a potato!

I have to say, even if it was true, it was an odd comment from a midwife. Lots of new mums seem hyper sensitive about it, so you’d think a midwife would know better.

One of my primary school teachers asked my parents whether I was adopted after being surprised that there was zero resemblance. They found it hilarious.

I still look nothing like any of my family, but my parents reassure me I was definitely not adopted (and Ancestry shows it to be true..)

Ach. When my daughter came out, the midwife took one look at her and said 'There's no mistaking who her father is!' (My Mum's comments were along the lines ofnhow strong DH's genes were...)

Looking back, I don't see any trace of me in her tiny baby photos, and anyone who said she looked anything like me would have been lying!

It's only at 5 that I now get told that she looks at me and very little like DH (though she has DH's eye colour). However, she does look very similar to her cousins on DH's side (a very clear look...)

Agree woth the comment that newborns all look like potatoes (or Elton John). They all develop their features- seeing what happens is half of the fun!

When my DS was born, I found my family and friends said he looked like me and DH family and friends said he looked like him. I didn't overthink it.

I kind of imagined every parent thought like that.

I didn't lol I thought my baby was the most beautiful being that graced the earth 😂😂 prancing around like an idiot waiting for the sea of people to part and coo as we passed. No matter how I rationalise I just can't for the life me see her any other way 😂😂

The comforting thing about this is he has to be a mix of you both, so if all his dad’s genes went to looks, he must be like you in his essentials!

I wouldn't be offended. My MIL and DH say both the kids are mini him complete mirror image. (They couldn't look more opposite, not only in distinct
Features but also one is blonde, pale and blue eyes, the other dark hair, darker skin like me and brown eyes 😂) he did admit that it wouldn't matter what they looked like he would always say they look like him. I think its a proud family member thing, it's a positive sign, that they identify the baby as their own type thing.

That’s quite a compliment to Churchill in many cases.

This is an interesting post. I’ve often wondered if mums know if their Dc is ugly or if they’d genuinely think they were beautiful.

…or dislikes your looks.

Op it doesn’t really matter. Children change as they grow and resemble different people at different times.

People also see things differently. I find lots of people are very influenced by colouring, especially those who aren’t interested enough to look further: “ oh he takes after his mum.” I’ve seen this with a grey dad who was blonde as a child and has a blonde son but is married to a lady who dyes hers blonde. Others look more at build, or face shape, others eyes or smile.

Somebody thought my eldest son was adopted (and nothing wrong about being adopted of course) because we looked so unalike. That's because he looks almost exactly like his father as does his younger brother. I suppose at a pinch one got my dark hair and one got my blue eyes. Not even my mother could see a resemblance to me but she adored them both. It really doesn't matter in the scheme of things. Actually my oldest feels a bit aggrieved because the men in my mother's family tended towards tall men with classic matinee idol looks and great athletic skills.

You're being a bit daft.

My eldest DC is the clone of his father, who I divorced 20 odd years ago. Freaks me out sometimes!

Sorry OP I think you are reading something into this that isn't there. Your MIL will remember your DH as a baby/child, and has known him a lot longer than you so will see similarities that you can't.

I always thought my friend's DS was the spit of his Dad until I saw photos of my friend as a baby.

I would say my DCs look more like their Dad ithan me, yet other people say that one of them is my double (I can't see that).

They are a mix of both of you and people will see different things at different times.

When I was a child I had people tell me I looked just like my mother, and just like my father, two days apart. People see different things, and honestly I've never been able to pick who a baby resembled. You are being silly to waste one second thinking about this, why would you even care?

I find it quite amusing. Both DM & MIL used to say each child, from the moment they were born, looked like great aunt Doris or their great, great, grandfather or some other random relative. Even now DM rabbits on about DD looking like certain relatives & drags out the photo album. I don't see the resemblance, but for some reason they are all desperate to claim looks ownership.

Maybe it's a biological thing. I just enjoy the show and if asked who I think they look like I just say 'themselves'.

My MIL used to do that too. "He is the spit of his daddy", "he's so clever just like his daddy".........I try not to take any notice.

Our 3 children all look like my husband. I mean really like little clones of him, from day 1. I just did all the heavy lifting and birthed them. I’ve had a few
comments that they look like me, people being kind I think. But honestly, I dated my husband initially because he was handsome, so I’ve no problem at all that the children favour him. Someone once asked me if it upsets me that no one looks like me. Can’t say it’s ever bothered me.

I didn't think our baby looked like either of why on earth does it matter? Do you think your baby was born of another woman and you were asleep at the time? No? Then seriously if this is the only thing you have to worry about then good

A prime example of someone looking to be offended. Does it really matter??

I once read something along the lines of it being hard-wired into the father’s side of the family to look for confirmation that the child belongs to their son, because it could, technically, be any man’s child. The mother, of course, is never in doubt!

YABU, perhaps she doesn't see it?!

My sister apparently looks like an aunt of ours, I've never seen the resemblance and think she looks like someone else on our father's side but I never mention it because it's clear lots of others think otherwise but I see what I see.

Just enjoy your baby, they change quite a lot in the first year so take lots of pictures.

🙄

MiLs are not allowed to have any connection with their sons children on MN.