Friend interrupting when I am talking

I have a good friend who does this. It drives me mad and occasionally I’ll snap at her ‘I was talking!’ or similar.* But she’s a good friend - her other qualities outweigh it, and I think it’s a sign of how relaxed she feels in my company that she forgets that it’s rude to do this.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable to feel annoyed, and if your friendship is strong she’ll acknowledge this and not be offended if you tell her. Good friends are so important.

*Yes, not the most mature or considered response. But I’m also human and flawed.

I have a friend who does this. To the point where she is asking me questions about the thing I'm talking about as I'm still explaining it.

Recently I pulled her up about it and she was very careful to modify herself. But it's creeping back in. I have avoided her lately as I'm going through a stressful time and conversing with her puts me on edge.

Ironically I've seen her tell others off for interrupting!

I'm a person who people seem to like interrupting, and I don't even talk loads, so it's not like I'm off on some monologue and they can't get their say in.

I was seeing a bloke who did it and he totally denied it so he got binned. My mum does it often. She can talk forever about nothing though. Sadly not someone you can mention it to because she'll take huge offence and sulk. I used to stop what I was saying and let her have her say but now I just keep on talking, a little bit louder than before, until I've finished my point. Just recently I've noticed one of my young adult DDs doing it, but I pulled her up straightaway.

Exactly how i am,I embarrass myself but can't stop it. I know I specifically do it to someone who takes ages to tell a story

I do this and only the last couple of years have been referred for ADHD assessment .
I'm sure I wouldn't interrupt a serious conversation however when I do it's spontaneous and I'm trying to not blurt stuff out or bang on too much.
Just being aware I do try.
It's not deliberate though.

I have some friends that have a tendency to do this. It drives me mad, I find it so rude. It just means I never really talk to them about anything serious/important to me, I rely on other friends for that. They have other lovely qualities that makes a friendship worth it, but there does feel a certain shallowness to the friendship sometimes. I couldn’t have these types of people as really close friends. I think it’s one thing if someone does it and says ‘sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt, you were saying about your mum…’ or whatever it is, but sometimes they just interrupt and then never go back to what you were in the middle of talking about- so basically were barely listening to you in the first place.

I have to admit that I do this. Not to point out random things like your friend, but when I want to share something relevant, or to empathise. I really struggle to find an appropriate time to do this (and yes I know it should be when the person has finished speaking). I’ve tried really hard to do this since becoming aware of it but find that the conversation often moves quickly on to something different if I wait right till the end so I don’t get the chance to say what I want to at all.

My mum is the same.

In my head I’m having a separate conversation with myself at the same time about what I want to say, whether I should say it and when I want to say it. I struggle with social anxiety though. I will not only plan what I want to say but I will replay conversations afterwards too.

Say "Let me finish", then finish your sentence or what you're saying without acknowledging the new subject.

I suspect my oh (literally most fabulous man on earth otherwise)
Does this. It drives me to insanity. We used to fight over it. Now I go completely silent & do t speak at all until he realises.
It's difficult but I strongly strongly suspect he is adhd (caffeine makes him tired) hugely successful but a fidget & gets blinded by doing something he loves & can work it at for 30 hours straight.

I know he doesn't mean it but it's an awful feeling especially when it's a serious conversation

My sister does this (also ADHD) and she also monologues for too long. I find it very annoying and just avoid telling her much. I also think ADHD is an excuse used too often. I get it may make you wan to talk over people , but I don't see why that can't be controlled. eg. Sandra is talking, I am going shut up until she's stopped.

Funnily enough Paul Whitehouse and his wife, Mina Conkbayi, have a new podcast about ADHD and they talk about the interrupting thing a lot. I find it hard to listen to because of her constant talking over other people, it's suffocating.

My Dh is ADHD and interrupts all the time which is why I struggle with Mina on the podcast. It's been so much easier since we talked about it, he tries to stop himself, I try to be understanding when he forgets, sometimes I snap 'let me speak!', often we laugh about it. Do you think your friend might be ND?

This reads like a Fast Show sketch.

This! Why would anyone want to spend time with someone who doesn't get that you're talking about your mum dying? How do you sustain a relationship with such a person? Why would you even bother to try?

I have a friend like this, she's really scatty and can't seem to focus for very long to keep a conversation really going. I do love her and she has a heart of gold and, like you, I don't see her very often as I can only do small doses. We could be sitting having a coffee, I'm looking at her, and she's looking at people at the next table, or I'll start talking about something she was talking about & she'll change the subject AND talk over me to do it! Some may see it as rude, but I know she's not being rude.

I know MN diagnoses are often ridiculed, and ND'ity is trundled out on every thread where someone's behaviour is called into question but I am certain my friend has something diagnosable, she has alluded to it herself when talking about her daughter who is ND.

Omg, I have a friend who does this too, even changed the subject to "ooh think it's going to rain" when I was talking about my mum's recent death and similar when I was talking about a family member being investigated for cancer. I was left thinking "are you actually fucking listening to me?". She's lovely so wonder if ND, her kids are, as are mine actually and I know it is generally inherited. I know I'm prone to interrupting too, but at least it's on topic, for eg. I'd chip in with an anecdote of someone I knew who was investigated for cancer etc.

I have one friend like this. It really annoys me as it basically feels like she's not listening. I try to be patient as she's a great friend in other ways.

if........id been miffed id have said so there n then....yabu for let it "really annoy you" first rule of other peopling is they are NOT you-or mindreaders...so if piss you off -tell them if ya bothered.
could be she doesnt actully realise is do it(i know i do so try to contain self when one of my forty thousand other things trys to come out my mouth)

My mil will ask a question and when you invest all your energy to answer what she has asked, she doesn't listen and will quickly turn her head and say "oh look at that dog". It's so frustrating.

My mil is like this and it's very frustrating. I think she has adhd though. Me though, I find it very difficult to confront her and instead of pulling her aside to tell her how annoying it is and how rude it is, I avoid having a conversation with her which is sad but honestly I dread being alone with her. My DH also had adhd but he doesn't interrupt. I have no clue about adhd but does it present differently?

First thing that came to my mind. I try to stop myself from doing it.

Interrupting because you're invested in the conversation and want to share your experience/view is completely different from interrupting with something entirely unrelated.

I know that some people really hate the first type, but it doesn't bother me at all, I see it as fairly normal conversation. The second type (which is what you're describing) is just downright rude, and shows that she's not listening/interested in what you're saying. I'm sorry to hear about your mum x

My husband does this all the time..it's bloody rude and makes me feel as if I must be boring his arse off. Totally unacceptable.

Either she’s has adhd traits, you talk too long or she’s self obsessed. Only you know

I also do this and am ND. I am aware of it and try so hard not to but…