Friend interrupting when I am talking

Nope but she's asking for views and I gave mine so pipe down.

Or maybe she’s just fucking rude? Not every person mentioned has to have a diagnosis.

I do get the urge to do this with particularly exciting conversations and have to cover my mouth with my hand to let the other person finish and do believe I'm on the spectrum, for many reasons! I have a friend that does this in every sentence I utter. She'll ask me about someone in my life that's very unwell, for example and I'll say two words and she's overlapping me already, trying to end my sentence. It's starting to really put me off meeting her to be honest. It's rude.

With my mum, I've found myself pre-arranging my sentences when I need to tell her something important, or even semi-important. This is to make sure I get the important part in within the first few words, as I can accurately predict at which point she's going to interject.

ie: To anyone else it would be "Sorry I'm a bit late, you won’t believe what happened! Blew a tyre on a country road and my battery was dead so I couldn't call RAC. I was going to walk into the village to call them from the pub but remembered I had a can of temporary tyre filler! So I managed to get it to Kwik Fit and all sorted now, phew!"

With my Mum it would need to be "Sorry I'm a bit late, blew a tyre BUT Had tyre filler can in boot so it's ok! I just used that as phone was dead, so would've had to walk into the village to the pub to call RAC as I was on a country road. Got it to Kwik Fit and all sorted now, phew!"

It's exhausting.

People who do this annoy me so much. I think you keep talking as they try to interrupt, which will hopefully give them the hint. If that doesn't work, a very polite "sorry, can I just finish what I was saying?" Or, if you have a third party there, wait for her to interrupt the other person and then you ask the other person to carry on with what they were saying. People soon realise they're doing it if you don't just stop for them.

My mum does this and I can’t STAND it. My autistic DD does it which I understand but DD & my DM are the only two people in my life (yes really!) and so it feel like I never ever get heard. Every once in a while I get angry and snap at them both which I know isn't right but it's built up frustration.

My sister in law who I never ever see is even worse! Not only does she interrupt but she asks further questions or completely changes the subject when I'm only 2/3 words into my response to her previous question! 🤬🤬🤬

That would drive me mad. I'm always annoyed when I see other people get interrupted in mid-sentence as well. And if I'm part of the conversation, I always make a point to circle back to the original speaker and ask something like, "Sorry Amy, what were you saying about X?" I also try and make a point to draw in someone who hasn't had a chance to speak yet, but is obviously part of the group.
I figure manners cost nothing.

I know someone like that. She'll ring me, drone on massively about her job and all the ailments she reckons she's got (most of it imagined), then when I finally manage to say something, she interrupts. I've started saying I've got to go as someone is at the door.

@toofless
I agree but what this actually means is that someone with ADHD may well disengage from the friendship to avoid being rude as it can be incredibly difficult to mask

I'd find it so annoying I wouldn't care if they did.

If I'm interrupted while I'm speaking I usually just shut up and stay quiet to the point of awkwardness once they've finished speaking. I had a friend who constantly interrupted and did say once "go on, you were saying XYZ..." when I reality I'd been saying ABC so I knew she hadn't been listening. I replied that had she been listening she'd have known that I said ABC and that it didn't matter now as I was obviously boring her. She was gobsmacked and said she didn't know I had anything important to say! I just replied case in point and walked away.

I'm guilty of the interrupting with my experience type of interrupting. I try not to. I don't really mind if people do it to me, I like a fast back and forth type of conversation.

I don't do the 'oh, a dog' type interruption very often. Or if I do, quickly then say 'you were saying about your application...' or whatever to bring the convo back. I have a friend you just says 'look at that lovely flower', 'oh a new food stall' (and then strikes up a conversation with stall owner), and whatever I was saying, however important, is forgotten and I feel daft. I couldn't bring myself to self-importantly say 'Let me finish,' as she clearly wasn't interested. I limit our contact quite a bit now, though she is a good friend in other ways.

I agree but what this actually means is that someone with ADHD may well disengage from the friendship to avoid being rude as it can be incredibly difficult to mask this.

ADHD isn’t an excuse for interrupting - it may be the reason, but it doesn’t excuse it. Just like being depressed doesn’t mean you’re allowed to be a horrible person (FIL has used the depression excuse before)….. Also people are just assuming OP’s friend has ADHD. I have ADHD and have had depression in the past. OP it just shows that she wasn’t listening to you - your story couldn’t keep her attention - but no one with any compassion who was actually listening to that story would interrupt with something irrelevant. Maybe file her away as someone not to talk about important things with? Friends can fulfil different needs, we can’t be everything to everyone I suppose.

I worked with a woman like this. She would cut across a conversation and start talking about something unrelated. If someone complained she'd say "Sorry I'm autistic" (she may be but she's never had a diagnosis).

A friend does it all the time, she stares at me if I tell her something then says something about something else, I can tell she hasn't listened to anything I've said.

DM used to drive me mad, I'd tell her something that happened, she'd be interrupting and looking out of the window etc. then at the end of what I was saying she'd say What did you say? and expect me to repeat it.

All three are rude. I make sure I don't interrupt, so it's done me a favour.

As you’re close friends this must be a change in behaviour either she has suddenly started interrupting or it’s only now started to irritate you. Either way it’s likely that something has prompted the change. Could it be that’s she’s developed a condition that is causing her new behaviour? Is something happening in your life that is causing you to be less tolerant than you have been?

An honest compassionate conversation would probably resolve this. I hope so as close friends are hard to find

With ADHD it's more like someone talking about going on holiday, they broke their flight in Germany. They continue talking about the holiday.

Meanwhile in your head you are thinking "ok so Germany Germany, need to show them I'm listening...war, ok but Switzerland were neutral weren't they? Swiss cheese has holes in, I'll say that because it shows I'm listening to the Germany thing"

The result is you bluntly interrupt them as they are talking about sitting round the pool (because they moved on from the Germany thing while you were desperately grasping at conversation straws) with "SO I HAD SWISS CHEESE LAST WEEK AND..."

I think that sometimes you are listening but a thought just pops into your head while... "Have we got any cheese?"

This describes what it’s like for me!

I haven’t been diagnosed with ADHD as I’ve never been to a GP about anything like that but posts on here about it in recent years describe me totally, and not just in this respect. Days just disappear as I start with a task in mind but then my thoughts go off in different directions and I can end the day having done very little that I was supposed to! The simplest task can take me hours.

Haha my mum does this!

She doesn't have ADHD, I think it's more to show she's lost interest in whatever I'm talking about.

I do it, also ADHD. Fwiw it's not not listening it's being anxious about hyper listening. Internally you're thinking "I am going to show this person I'm listening so hard that I MUST find things to say that are relevant to thing they are talking about" you're so worried about this that you don't listen to the person because your head is full of "don't interrupt don't speak but you must comment to show you are listening so be careful now" and then you think of something and you have to say it immediately before it's forgotten. Because your head was so busy it then seems mis-timed and irrelevant.

It's like having drop dead Fred stand behind you whispering and then he pushes you forward so you blurt it out.

We had an employee who used to do that to me (only me) it drove me nuts I actually found myself saying less and less at work because she would do it every time I tried to speak to someone else in the office because I could never get a word in. So damm rude

Sometimes social anxiety and wanting to demonstrate empathy means interrupting to agree- irritating but coming from a good place
This sounds like ADHD also coming from a good place and unintentional but hard to live with on a sensitive topic like serious illness. Don’t assume it’s coming from any malice though.

Dh does this when we are disagreeing. I now just keep talking as tho he didn't speak.

My lovely friend who has adhd also does it but I forgive her as she can't help it

Dh talks over people constantly.
And if he can’t remember the exact details of a tale he’s telling he makes them up.
Drives me mad.