To think that people overuse therapy as a solution for every problem?

🤣 small mercies and all

At least they weren't exorcised? Look on the bright side.

Self help books don't provide support. They don't validate you, challenge your misconceptions or address your particular issue. Peers often try hard but give the wrong kind of support by drawing comparisons with their own usually irrelevant situation. Or they offer unhelpful advice rather than working through the issue to empower the person to find their own solutions. Also a lot of people have their own issues and don't want to take on other people's.

Decent therapists are very good at helping people to build resilience and introduce better coping strategies and in supporting clients to make desirable lifestyle changes.

How many therapists have you actually seen yourself to know so much about it?

I also think the collective/ mob gaslighting was off the scale in the past; those good old days......

The priest did something inappropriately to Jonny? Don't be so ridiculous you terrible child, stop lying.

You aren't happy with how your husband treats you? What are you failing to do to provide for him? Are you ensuring you're meeting his needs?

Oh your child is Autistic? Well that's because frigid mothers are responsible for causing Autism and you need try harder.

I mean I could go on, but what choice was there but to paint a smile and live in the delusion back then. There was no other safe space to go for most I imagine.

Yeah.. and be told to put up and shut up, so everyone can pretend it's not happening.

Oh, the good old days. 🥰

@SnugOtter i would say a lack of larger/close family connection as well as a lack of religious leadership might play a role.
i suspect 50+ years ago women might discuss stress and trauma with their sisters cousins and aunts and some to the parish minister.
i think there were as many "therapists" around then as there are now, just that the role is now more formalized.

Therapy is a tool. Not everyone reacts in the exact same way to medication (for physical issues) . For some they work great, for some they don't work at all, for some they only work a little bit, but not enough to make a difference etc. Does that mean that people shouldn't try taking them?

It depends on the type of therapy. Over the last couple of years I've had sessions with a solution focused hypnotherapist - they don't go into your past and unravel it all - although past events can sometimes be useful to remember/discuss. They concentrate on what is right with you, your strengths, the positive side of you and help you build on that to achieve what you want to achieve. It certainly works for me.
https://www.afsfh.com/what-is-solution-focused-hypnotherapy/

Spot on. I keep wondering why I ended up with major sleeping problems from a young age as the only one from my family. I literally have no clue how they sleep so soundly. Id say it is denial but even so, their system just know somehow that something is up. I have no idea.

The NHS offers a lot more than CBT. My dc have had highly specialised therapies from highly qualified professionals.It has been a massive battle at times to get it though .

Watched a fantastic podcast about the fact it's sociopathic/narcissistic/ abusive parents that drive all these people into therapy.

The perpetrators are very unfairly the ones who sleep well at night.

Therapy is extremely difficult. In a way someone is just trying to help you cure yourself. And often no cure is possible, just improvement. I cannot describe the amount of 'strength' therapy takes to achieve meaningful change. And I don't like the word strength because it suggests that some may have not been strong enough to achieve that which simply isn't true.

I well matched therapist is like gold.

I don't see therapy as the route to ongoing happiness. For me it has probably kept me fighting longer than my body really wants me to. It has helped me see reality. When you see reality, you see what is and has always driven almost everything you do. You then make much better decisions for yourself and hopefully ease the suffering.

It's not the job of a therapist to save someone from suicide and that is no barometer in my mind of it's value. Some hurdles, for some people, will not be overcome and that's another reality I'd like to see come more into acceptance.

I think people vastly over estimate the skills the NHS therapists have. In my Trust anyway.
It's a band 4-5 post. No professional qualification needed, one day a week on the job training for one year. CBT training is realistically all that is offered. And I'm sorry to say in most cases they don't provide anything that can't be accessed on line.
And don't start me on private therapists - absolutely anyone can see up as a private therapist and most service users seem to have bugger all idea who they are employing.

@Dappy777 parents and grandparents are exactly the reason why we need therapy.

What a ridiculous post.

I think it's the opposite - that people throw out 'get therapy' to people with serious issues as if that will miraculously erase all trauma and baggage. It can be very helpful, but it's not magic. If someone were paralysed due to physical trauma we wouldn't just roll our eyes and say 'they should get physical therapy.'

I have known several people who've spent their lives in and out of therapy. None of them seem any happier for it. Frankly, therapy just doesn't seem to work very well. I had a friend who was agoraphobic, for example, and got thousands of pounds into debt from having a psychotherapist come to her house twice a week. She's still agoraphobic, and even attempted suicide last year.

We now live in a therapy culture, yet when I think back to my grandparents generation (pre-war), they seemed stronger and happier than us!

@Doireallywanttodothis Excellent contribution and exactly my experience as a client. I have just calculated that I have spent a total of £15k on therapy over a number of years for childhood trauma and cptsd and addiction. I resent having to spend this kind of money on something someone else was responsible for. When I first started therapy I could not have imagined that I'd return to it again and again over the years but it was necessary to remain functional.

I’m a therapist. Can’t say I’ve ever encountered a ‘small challenge’ in a client’s life that was actually that small or completely about the face value issue once you dig a bit deeper. I also wonder what’s wrong with using therapy to support us through life?

Thanks for this post. 100% agree. I fall into the client category of functional enough to hold down my job but masking my issues is exhausting. I do 1 extra shift every 8 weeks to pay for mine privately because it is so valuable. I can't recommend talking therapies enough, it has helped me build self esteem, put in boundaries so I don't burnout and cope with things that would have preciously seen me spiral. I feel there is a misconception that therapy is a nice chat and a moan because you've had a crap shift at work that week. It is long term hard work trying to address some deeply rooted historical issues that contribute to how you feel about yourself and how you cope with things now.

Actually, thinking about it, I can totally see why people in certain professions might actually need therapy after a "bad week" and about 10 different circumstances in which it would apply too.

So your attempt at trivial , was poorly chosen.

If it helps , I need therapy but can't access it due to various mental blocks, which ironically would probably be sorted in therapy.

I can detail the particular traumas if you want me to and see if they meet your threshold.

Out of curiosity do you have a concrete example of a person in your life or a thread on here where someone went to therapy for a "bad week at work"?

This is an awful and judgemental thread to start. It's so dismissive of peoples problems and the solutions they are seeking.

I think the issues are a lack of nhs therapy and too many bad therapists.
I do think it's great that people are more open about MH now as years ago, we all smoked too much, drank/took drugs too much and had undiagnosed eating disorders in order to cope.