Haven’t paid rent in months!

Maybe he does have ADHD. Maybe he cannot cope with the death of his son and has spent the last 6 months in a drunken haze, maybe he is absolutely on the bones of his arse and is going to lose his home or maybe he is a billionaire and murders kittens in his spare time. We don't know.

What we do know is that he didn't start this thread, OP did. We also know it is highly unlikely that he will ever read this thread, OP will.

Of course, losing a child is the worst tragedy that could ever befall a parent, but facing homelessness also isn't nice, even if it is self-inflicted (although there is also the possibility OP is telling the truth and is too unwell to manage her finances and needs support). It's not comparable but as I said the LL is not reading the thread.

People are making a lot of assumptions about the LL in order to maximise their sympathy for him and bash the OP further.

No one’s making assumptions beyond acknowledging the man is grieving as his son died - a terrible event. I suggested he may have ADHD, not an assumption and not based on anything at all, but if OP’s list of issues excuse her of paying for the roof over her head, perhaps the LL also has a list of issues that make it even worse he’s had the rent money stolen for 6 months. Compassion can’t flow only one way.

Why did the bank stop your direct debit that you had paid for last 3yrs or so ?

What did the bank say ?

Ans for curiosity sake - how much is your rent ? £400 a month or heading to £1000 area depending

If on Benefits then assume uc paid a chunk of it if not most /all a month

So still can't see how you can spend £2.6/6k and not known or have anything to show for it

Ie if got lots of clothes can sell on Vinted and try and recoup some of the money

People are making a lot of assumptions about the LL in order to maximise their sympathy for him and bash the OP further. All we know is he inherited the house from his son and might sell if he can't come to a suitable arrangement with OP. We don't know if he has a mortgage, mental health issues himself if he cannot afford to keep the flat, or any of the other things posters are assuming and using as a stick to beat OP with.

It could very well be that he simply doesn't want to be a LL and has only kept the house because OP lives there and would rather sell than go to the trouble of finding a new tenant if OP can't afford to stay.

OP, I'm glad your chat went well and I hope you can find a way forward and access the right support.

If for any reason you can't and the LL does put the house on the market please don't listen to the posters telling you to leave asap. If you do that the council will class you as intentionally homeless and refuse to rehouse you. You must stay until the bailiffs turn up and remove you.

It's a shitty situation for the LL and the tenant but unfortunately, that is the way the government dictates it must work.

She didn’t pay her rent and that is on her

As a landlord I wouldnt consider my having to sell my flat an acceptable compromise at all. Especially after I had lost my son.

This is why I try to actively avoid this tyoe of situation. I have my own MH to think of.

Pleased to hear you had that conversation with the landlord. Whats the forward plan? How you going to pay it back?

Where is your compassion for the OP?

Shame that won't pay his mortgage though...

From the update am I right that if it can't be paid he has to sell??? That is absolutely awful if true and completely unfair to him. I'm sure his mental healthbis not good right now either.

And where is your compassion for the landlord?

Maybe the landlord wants to sell because they don't feel able to deal with a tenant who doesn't pay their rent because the landlord likely has their own issues in life to cope with.

Thank you for updating

So many don't

You say trying to find a solution

That means paying back the 6mths rent surely

Rather then the landlord have to sell ?

Surely he would give you notice end get another tennant in AND you pay the outstanding amount

It sounds like you’re going through an incredibly tough time, and it’s totally understandable how things like this can slip through the cracks when you're managing so much.

Hitting rock bottom and trying to cope with MH challenges can make keeping track of finances overwhelming, especially if you’re in a "survival mode" mindset.

First, take a deep breath. There are ways to address this, and there’s support available. Here are some steps that might help:

It may feel daunting, but reaching out to your landlord is a positive step. Explain that you've just realized what’s happened and are committed to sorting things out. Many landlords are more understanding than we expect, especially if you’re upfront.

Charities like Citizens Advice or Shelter can provide free financial counseling and help you negotiate a repayment plan, which could make this manageable.

They can also check if you’re getting all the benefits you’re entitled to and help set up payment arrangements for other bills if needed.

Consider reaching out to your benefits office to see if they can help set up a direct rent payment to your landlord. This can relieve some of the stress of keeping track each month.

Tackling finances with anxiety and depression is hard. Connecting with MH support groups or talking to your doctor about additional support might give you some breathing room. Managing your mental health will make handling other challenges easier in the long run.

Remember, you’re doing the best you can, and taking even small steps to address this shows real strength. One step at a time, and you don’t have to do it alone.

I’m sorry but that might help with the landlord but it won’t help if they choose to evict her.

If you owe two months rent when you are served with a notice that they intend to issue eviction proceedings under Ground 8 mandatory grounds for eviction, and you still owe that at the date of the court hearing the judge has no discretion, tney have to order an eviction. The only discretion is whether to allow you two weeks or six weeks to leave your home.

That’s the law, sorry. But people need to be aware.

If you get housing benefit or equivalent on Universal credit, you can arrange for it to be paid directly to your landlord from the Dwp so you don't need to worry about paying it. Then find a way to repay the 6 months rent. Look up dave ramsay and rachel cruze on Facebook for budgeting help

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. You must have noticed your rent wasn’t being paid and have to accept some responsibility.
when on a tight budget I would know where every penny was going.

Well yes I would be saying the same thing. As I said she's not done a truly horrible evil crime, thankfully. People are so easy to judge 👩‍⚖️ 🤔 oh she hasn't paid her bills, she has mental health issues, those poor kids shouldn't be with her!! Get a grip 🙄. I'd be offering help, a little understanding. Kindness costs nothing 😌 ✨️

Glad she has spoken to her LL 👏

I think you should ask a trusted person to help you check your finances, your rent and other bills. I understand you have MH issues but financial instability will only add to that. A close friend, a family member, someone who (for example) once in a fortnight sits down with you and checks everything is as it should be.

Trust me as someone who is often paralysed, we know this. As I said in my other post, I have lost over £100,000 due to this. Only this year have I been diagnosed with ADHD. At 47. And the diagnosis doesnt mean all the bad things that I do disappear. No. Granted, I have never done this with bills. The idea of owing money probably terrifies me too much

I’m not sure you’d be saying that if you were the landlord or the guarantor

I'm not sure swearing about it helps anyone. People in a wheelchair (a subject you've raised) still have to pay their bills. People on benefits, whether it's a physical or mental ailment still have to pay their bills. If they need help, CAB or StepChange or in some cases Councils have debt help depts too. People with mental ill health are unlikely to feel better if they get evicted. The landlord is entitled to be paid. Please avoid swearing at me if you decide to reply. It is unnecessary and offensive

If you are seeing a psychiatrist OP they can write you a supportive letter to you landlord.
Also your psychiatrist can refer you and your children directly for council housing to your council.

Do any councils have immediately available properties these days? I thought there were massive waiting lists

Register with your councils housing service and look to see if they have immediately available properties. These are generally i. less favoured areas, or are flats. We moved into one a while ago and the only thing we lost was internal stairs.