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AIBU?

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Original poster

DH refers to himself as my “Dad”

482 replies

GingerBreadGinge · 29/10/2024 18:22

Weird one! DH has for a long time referred to himself as “Daddy” when it comes to me. (Not sexual!)

For example if I need his help he will say “Your Daddy will do it” “Daddy do” or “Let your Dad help you” or “Your Father will fix it” He keeps saying he should really stop calling himself my Dad.

Is this infantilising? We do have kids so he is used to being “Daddy” but he refers to himself as my “Dad”

AIBU? Is this weird?? He also says “Good girl!” When I’ve done a task etc. Or “You’re a good girl!” I’m in my forties!! DS has even begun to correct him saying “She’s not a girl, she’s a woman” Etc.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Newsenmum · 29/10/2024 19:55

GingerBreadGinge · 29/10/2024 19:10

If he has said it during sex I’ve blocked it out!

Well what is he like with it in sex?

Do you have a plan with how you want to deal with this?

betterangels · 29/10/2024 19:54

ThatTealViewer · 29/10/2024 19:41

But have you said ‘I don’t like it, stop.’ Have you directly communicated?

Show quote history

Yes! Tell him to cut that shit out.

Nothatgingerpirate · 29/10/2024 19:54

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Probably.
I never heard of "Daddy do" or anything like this.
😳
My husband is three decades older.

betterangels · 29/10/2024 19:53

That's completely gross. How haven't you asked what the fuck is wrong with him?

ballsdeep · 29/10/2024 19:52

Well this has made me shrivel up like a dried walnut

DiddysLube · 29/10/2024 19:52

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SleeplessInWherever · 29/10/2024 19:45

Agree with other posters - he’s got a Daddy kink, or some kind of power/domination kink, that he’s just doing in your day to day life. Either testing the waters or just not approached it in the bedroom yet.

That sort of thing should be absolutely nowhere near your children, and shouldn’t be happening at all if you’ve said no to it.

butterpuffed · 29/10/2024 19:44

OP , do you realise you're commenting on the posts in quite a lighthearted way?

Maybe this is how you're reacting to your DH too. You need to tell him you're serious and refuse to put up with it any more .

duc748 · 29/10/2024 19:43

Just reading the OP reminded me of the old Belgian series the Out-Laws, which featured a hilariously creepy man who referred to his wife at all times as "Mummy" (even at a adult dinner party). His wife's sisters stepped in and plotted to get him whacked.

canyouletthedogoutplease · 29/10/2024 19:42

He might have done it during sex, but you might have blocked it out?

You sound really disconnected to what's going on here. It's a bit worrying. How old is your DC?

ThatTealViewer · 29/10/2024 19:41

GingerBreadGinge · 29/10/2024 18:37

I have told him it’s weird but he still does it.

Show quote history

But have you said ‘I don’t like it, stop.’ Have you directly communicated?

Stormyweatheroutthere · 29/10/2024 19:41

Well that's sex out the window.. Unless he approves of incest?

TowerRavenSeven · 29/10/2024 19:39

Ick! Dh did this Once after we were married and I told him in no uncertain terms not to do it and I haven’t heard it since (25 years ago!)

LostittoBostik · 29/10/2024 19:39

Euurrvhhhhh

I've just died of the ick

FrangipaniBlue · 29/10/2024 19:38

LegoTherapy · 29/10/2024 18:24

How has your vagina not clamped shut?

Nailed it

PattiSmithsPattis · 29/10/2024 19:38

@diddl yep, that's definitely cringe.

If you don't like it @GingerBreadGinge you have to tell him very STRONGLY that it grosses you out and until he stops you will be sleeping separately because you're repulsed by it.
Wonder how quickly he'll drop the 'habit'

DrizzleMySwizzle · 29/10/2024 19:38

I'd turn the tables on him and refer to myself as Big Poppa.

'Let Big Poppa help you out of those pants'.

OrangeSlices998 · 29/10/2024 19:38

Have you told him clearly and explicitly you really dislike it, it gives you the ick and needs to stop?

ThianWinter · 29/10/2024 19:38

Eurgh. He’s into major daddy daughter kink. Bin him.

DarkBlueStocking · 29/10/2024 19:37

GingerBreadGinge · 29/10/2024 18:45

For added info - I have ADHD (diagnosed as an adult) and there are things that I struggle with and more so when we first met (I was unaware of ADHD then) DH is highly intelligent, efficient, thinks extremely fast and is a self confessed “control freak” It feels like he has always treated me like a child and him referring to himself as my “Daddy” and him calling me a “girl” cements this.

I do things differently to him, not necessarily wrong but different.

That’s seriously concerning, OP. I was going to reply lightheartedly, but it’s not at all funny.

IAKnowyou · 29/10/2024 19:36

"Daddy do" just made me shrivel up completely.

cactimouse · 29/10/2024 19:36

this, every time he does it.

Angry Oh No GIF by CBC
Channellingsophistication · 29/10/2024 19:35

That is really quite weird and you have to stop him doing it perhaps try
@Wendysfriend’s brilliant response that made me bellow with laughter! Sorry OP not funny I know hope you can get him to stop

LoveHearts69 · 29/10/2024 19:34

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This.

its actually really concerning he does this.