Why are all MILs so horrible?

Nope. My ex MIL was so lovely, still text her now. I loved planning stuff for her when she was visiting

I guess it depends on who provides free childcare

Why are all MILs said to be narcissistic ?

Is it something that happens in utero when carrying a boy? Because lots of men think their mil is fine🤷🏻‍♀️

My MIL is great! She's been staying with us since the end of September but is due to go home this weekend (boooo). Hopefully she'll stay with us again soon.

My ex h was a prick but his mum is lovely, she still sends Christmas cards!

my husbands mum is also lovely, married for 20 years and she’s been a far better mother to me than my own ever was!

They aren't. Mine is great.

First time I met her, she got me drunk on wine. 😁

Great woman.

Mine was like a second mum to me. Until we got married and had a baby, she just changed, what feels like, overnight. It will always make me sad. I hope, I can learn from that, for my own DC.

Same!

I adore mine.

She's intelligent, cosmopolitan, empathetic, well-read.

In more than half of the cases that people seem to post about, it's a DH problem not a MIL problem imo.

I think I’ll be a great mil.

My children’s paternal granny was a lovely woman, far better than her son.

Mine was lovely… until we got engaged!

Now I avoid her and use her for the very occasional babysitting. That’s all she is to me, a babysitter.

Mine is lovely.

But she's also willing to see the faults in her own son and not think I'm the big bad wolf and he's a poor angel.

Alot of MILs blame the DIL for a change in their relationship with their son. Whereas in reality its the DIL's trying to get him to call/contact.

My MIL is my best friend. She's simply amazing. I hope she's taught me a few things if I'm ever lucky enough to be a MIL myself.

I’m not. I’m bloody awesome.

I learned how to do it well from my own awesome MIL. She was fucking fantastic and I miss her every day.

My MIL is lovely and my DD loves hers, its absolute rubbish to say all MILs are awful. From reading so many threads on here I reckon its often the DIL who is batshit crazy.

Hmm.. in our family's case my grandmother is an absolute sweetheart who really tried to welcome my uncle's wife into the family. But unfortunately, she rebuffed everything frostily & took every opportunity to humiliate her. The worst time was when they came to visit my grandmother & she insisted on cutting her hair, although she expressly didn't want this done. We think it might be a snobby thing as she comes from quite a posh background & uncle began acting as if we were beneath him after they married.

The relationship between mil and I to begin with was a little bumpy, but over the years, I’ve grown to love her and her quirks. We’ve managed to establish a really good relationship. She’s amazing - as is my fil.

I think there are women who would not be attracted to the man if they got on with the MIL there seems to be this territorial thing happening 'he's mine now' like a piece of meat

Why are all MILs so horrible?
All? YABU! NAMILALT

On the bright side, someday you may be one of the 'all horrible MILs' too and be hated as expected. You're not going to be the only exception are you?

They're are plenty about mums too but it is harder with a MIL to navigate, especially if you find it hard to effectively, and politely, communicate and discuss boundaries and vice versa and have very different family expectations. Immaturity on both sides!

Some MIL are, of course, awful - some people are! Take any group of random people - colleagues etc. and imagine them as MIL (or DIL) - sure some would be amazing and others almost intolerable!

Now I'm getting towards MIL age I fear I may not be the MIL I wish to be - it will to at least some extent be dependable on DIL - I'm not emotionally mature enough for it not to be! I hadn't fully considered that. DS's new GF really grates on me (to me - lazy/lacks any ambition, entitled/oversteps boundaries, doesn't seem to be able to say thank you) and I have to try really hard to hide it. I'm already less generous and different than I was with his other GF - 'polite but remote'. He's smitten! ARGH!! Hopefully I won't actually be a MIL for another 8+ years - not ready!

Mine is great when she’s sober.

Shame she’s drunk 99% of the time nowadays.

I absolutely loathed my ex's mother, she is the most awful person I've ever met.

I love my DH's family.

I've known two other people with awful MILs. One said, in her 60s, that dealing with her over the duration of her marriage was harder than dealing with her husband's cancer. The other delayed her wedding for two years because of MILs shenanigans and eventually they eloped.

I know plenty of people with issues with their own parents too though.

Mine was great. I don't think 'something happens to mothers of men', I think you're on a forum which has a majority usebase of straight women and therefore you're seeing the perspective of people whose mother-in-law is the mother of a man. Just thinking of the straight men I know, I know plenty of who dislike their own mothers-in-law.

I think the 'problem' is that a lot of parents and children are bad at communicating boundaries with each other.

My mil is lovely. Need to remember that the type of people who come on here do so often because they don’t have friends or a support system in real life. So you will disproportionately hear the bad stories.

Me too!