To think the term 'childfree' is as bad as 'childless'

I’m childfree is just a quicker way of saying the same thing, I think either is fine and it’s up to the person answering the question how they feel comfortable phrasing things which could differ depending on the person they’re speaking to.

I would just say 'I don't want to have children' (if I had none that is)

This thread is an excellent example of one where people aren’t RTFT. The same question ‘why can’t you just say ‘I don’t have children’ is getting asked & answered over & over again.

Often those terms are needed because these types of conversations are usual

do you have children?
no, do you?
yes I have three, have you tried ivf?
oh actually I’m childfree

So when does is start obviously a 6 yo has no children but do they need a label?, what about 14, 17, 18, 20, 21, 25, 30, 50, 80?

When do you need a label if you wanted one that is

I didn't have children until my mid-30s. Before I had children, I never once described myself as child free, childless or a non-parent. Why would I ever need to use one of those terms? People would ask me if I had children and I would say "No". Job done.

I would take "childfree" to mean childfree by choice, ie the person has decided they are happier without children.

I take "childless" to mean the person did/does want children but hasn't had them due to life circumstances/ infertility etc and they are sad about it.

I take "non-parent" to be merely a factual statement and I wouldn't assume anything about the person's feelings/reasons for having no children based on that phrase.

How long until someone asks what all these women without children are doing on mumsnet?

I'm a libertarian on this issue: women have fought for the rights they have in some Western countries, and they should avail of them to the full. However, the dictionary definition of "abnormal" is:

deviating from what is normal or usual, typically in a way that is undesirable or worrying.

Your definition is somewhat selective. Scientifically, it means "atypical" or "out of the norm", which is exactly what I meant. As I say, I make no judgement. This thread shows that many women choose to be atypical and not subscribe to the 'undesirable' or 'worrying' undertones. You can choose to do the same, in the same way that you can choose not to have children.

If you're not in the category, you don't get to say what we are and aren't allowed to call ourselves thanks.

I'm childfree. Like fuck and I a non-parent like parent is the default.

@Onlyonekenobe
Abnormal definition:"unusual in an unwelcome or problematic way"

So yes it really is a value judgement to say that not having children is abnormal and a pretty unpleasant one at that.

Non-white and gay people are in a minority too. Are they abnormal?

I don’t think OP is coming back.

But people who don’t have children should use whichever term they want to describe themselves. It’s really nothing to do with people who have children, as (obviously) neither term would be used for them.

I think childfree and childless are very different concepts and we need both words.

I'm childfree by choice and think 'free' captures it nicely on all levels 😉

Like standing in front of ten dog owners, announcing how dogs are foul, and portraying superiority at being "dogfree.".

This is an assumption of portrayed superiority, you've drawn.

I'm a dog owner, I woudn't feel offended if someone stood in front of me and pronounced they didn't want a dog, didn't want to deal with the dog hair, the dog walking, the curtailment of overseas holidays, or the general mess or expense.

I would think I had met someone who didn't want a dog and think no further of it. Superiority wouldn't come into it. Same if I meet someone that doesn't have children. I don't feel any particular way about it at all, even if they describe themselves as childfree. Good for you, you go. Enjoy your white sofa, and your spotless carpets, and your long haul flights, genuinely, we all need to embrace what we have chosen, accept there are others who do not choose what we do, and stop feeling attacked by others choices when they don't align with our own, it's much more peaceful that way.

I don't care what others say or what definition is what it means all the same to me, but to me we don't need more labels in life

People can say what they want, things used to happen in life now people need to stick a label on it

You do realise that abnormal doesn't just mean deviated from the 'normal'. There is an additional connotation of it being an undesirable state. So please don't call me abnormal.

You do realise that ‘abnormal’ usually has negative connotations, it doesn’t just mean unusual?

If someone told me I was ‘abnormal’ for not wanting kids, I’d think they were rude and stupid.

This!!!!

Nobody has said that it's a bad thing? Maybe they have, I haven't read every post.

It is abnormal to not have children.

20% is what it is: 20%.

I'm not making a value judgement. I'm pointing out that having children is indeed the default, and not having them is indeed abnormal.

Exactly.

So why do so many people treat is a whichcraft or something to pity
(depends on the free or less) 🤷

It doesn't mean it's abnormal or a bad thing to not have children. 20% of people never have children. It's not exactly a tiny percentage.

Yes, several posters have said that & its been discussed in some detail.