To think the term 'childfree' is as bad as 'childless'

It's fine, besides you get parents making jokes about hoenfheyvwish they could he free of their children for one day or a few hours.

And almost never used in the context of men. Couple, yes but single men, no.

Yes it’s too much like “non-person”.

The whole word replacement thing is fairly ridiculous in 99% of cases. Childless is a word formation that just means a person without a child. Any moral or emotional element comes from inside the person thinking about, saying, or hearing it. In and of itself it simply isn't offensive.

But it can be used as a slur,as in childless cat lady.

Some people are reading WAAAAAAY too much into “childfree” and coming to some frankly hilariously deranged conclusions. Literally no one has said that children as a class/demographic are valueless and universally awful. Childfree people would PERSONALLY find it awful to have THEIR OWN child, and would find parenting burdensome, unpleasant and significantly worse than a life without children. There is a huge gap - nay, a CHASM - between feeling that a child would be a negative presence in one’s own life, and feeling that an entire demographic is worthless. Maybe you lot who think the childfree are secretly hoping for a genocide of under-18s can pass that brain cell around and think about the simple concept of ~personal opinions~.

A lot of the people on this thread saying that children are a burden are parents.

This is a very weird definition of 'normal'. I am 5 feet 2 inches tall. 70% of British women are taller than I am. Does that make me abnormal?

If not, what percentage has to be taller than me to make me abnormal? 75%? 80%? 95%?
Your choice of 'abnormal' rather than 'unusual' sounds very much like a value judgement to me.

I agree

But adopted children and children in care exist. That’s why they have value, whether they were wanted by their biological parents or not. A non-existent child which doesn’t exist because a woman decided she didn’t want it to exist is neither wanted nor unwanted, and it can’t feel sad or intrinsically lower in value than anything. Saying “I’m childfree because I didn’t want children” has absolutely no impact on any other child or their situation and doesn’t mean “if an existing child was unwanted by its parent it has no value.”

The whole word replacement thing is fairly ridiculous in 99% of cases. Childless is a word formation that just means a person without a child. Any moral or emotional element comes from inside the person thinking about, saying, or hearing it. In and of itself it simply isn't offensive.

And of course just changing the word doesn't change people's feelings about having or not having children. If they feel badly about it, they will still feel badly. If they feel judged, they will still feel judged. Etc.

"Child free" however is a strange word because the construction is usually used to refer to something unpleasant, like "bedbug free" or "disease free". It's not something you'd normally use about people - "Italian-Free" or "elder-free" or "woman-free" all sound pretty nasty and would never be accepted. Even in a place where for some reason women weren't supposed to be, it would be an odd thing to say and people would wonder.

it isn't saying children aren't valuable to someone else

That's the point I'm arguing against - value isn't determined by someone else. It's intrinsic. The suffix "free" is a subjective value statement. A neutral term, such as "does not have children", is better.

My point about adoption was that there are children in care who are actually not wanted, but that this doesn't make them any less valuable. It wasn't that people without children should feel obliged to adopt them, which is how you seem to have interpreted it.

Using language to manipulate our opinions of certain demographics has been proven very dangerous multiple times throughout history.

That’s good. Lots of people have though and that’s why a lot of people use childless or childfree, so they’re not given unwelcome advice or asked unwelcome questions.

I have a friend who was disowned by her parents and lost what she thought was a good friend for not wanting children and she now says she’s childless rather than childfree. Alternatively I have a friend who is childless and says she’s childfree because she’s sick of being given advice on how to conceive or adopt. Everyone has their own reasons for the language they use around different topics so it’s good that there’s plenty of ways to say things and different options for everyone’s choices.

Childfree people aren’t talking negatively about existing children

Are you not reading the same thread. Where they are describing children as burdens, and quite nastily, awful.

Many childfree people work with or are very close to children in their lives. We don’t hate kids because we don’t want our own.

Again, not how others are coming across. And that's the problem. A minority smirking how they are "free" of these awful humans, free of these burdens. And then doing Pikachu-shocked-face that it could remotely be offensive to those with said awful humans.

Then there's the majority of people without children, very normally and respectfully saying that they enjoy not having the obligation of raising a child, which is not loaded, not derogatory....yet their voices are completely drowned out by the minority. And that's what is being represented as "childfree". Unfairly so.

I love my DC. Can I see the pleasures I would have in life without them? Oh god yes. I can absolutely see the appeal. There are many benefits, many pros. I can see why people would choose a life without children. For 100 reasons.

But it's not my choice. And that's ok. My choice isn't better, but it isn't worse either. It's just different. It's about being respectful to others life choices.

Children ARE a massive burden. Rearing a child responsibly, and making that child happy uses vast reserves of its parents' time, energy, and material resources.
If you have a child and love them, and want them ( as I do) then this burden is usually offset by the happiness your child brings you, and the love you have for them.
But describing yourself as child-free if you don't have children and don't want them is fairly accurate, I think.
None of my child-free friends is judging people who have children, they are mostly very kind and generous to mine; they just don't want to have their own, and that's honestly no one else's business.

The free means without. Like carefree .

The fact that you attribute it a different meaning is a personal perspective.

@DahliaSmith so sorry I was responding to a different poster whose comment was deleted as I was responding so my answer seems to have attached itself to yours!

Ignore my ill tempered rant, it wasn’t meant for you!

You what now?

Women who don’t have children (whether through choice or otherwise) have been pitied and condescended to for centuries.

They finally find a word which is accurate and non judgemental and you want them put back in the patronising patriarchal box they were in before.

Equality feels like oppression to the privileged but you need to get over it!

Really? I've never had a conversation like that.

This is what I have always encountered in real life. I don't think I've ever heard anyone actually using 'childfree' or 'childless'. If I meet someone they may or may not talk about their children if they have any. If they don't it doesn't come up unless they mention it.

I hate child free and childless it feels like some kind of badge that is used to shame those who don't have children.

I just say i don't have children, I have cats instead.

I mean, you don't say someone is petless or pet free you say they don't have pets.

I agree.

What's wrong with 'adult' to describe oneself?

Why do adults define themselves by their parenthood status?

@Onlyonekenobe has misunderstood what "normal" means. It's about conforming to a norm, or a rule, something which you should do as a moral imperative. It doesn't mean something that most people do.

It's not "normal" to have kids (in my moral code anyway) but it is usual.

End of English lesson.

“It’s different when it’s your own.”

To me it is a bit like text speak or acronyms, it would be easier for me to say 'I don't want children' then thinking of the word 'childfree'

And the former is a choice and a fact the latter a label and I see no need for a label

And yes I am speaking of myself if I did not have any children

Yabu. Absolute bonkers, first world problem, taking offence and trying to police other’s language, nothing better to do.