AIBU to keep my baby with me when she’s unwell?

You must have heard the saying 'never step in between a mother bear and her cubs'? Find your inner mother bear and channel her! Sometimes mums need to be fierce and not passive.

I agree!!
Seriously OP, wtf?! I would tell her to go home! You do not need this right now and you shouldn’t be having your baby taken away from you for hours and hours every day!

If your baby has been used to MIL looking after her all day every day then they probably have more of a bond with her right now so given they are unwell, they will be even more unsettled.

Just say “no” and either keep repeating it or ignore any protests.

Shit...that baby needs you present.

What do you do all day if MIL and baby are in their room? Do you have another job you go to? This is all very bizzarre OP.

She normally takes the baby to her room and I won’t see her all day.
This annoys me but I let it slide.

What? I think there is a LOT more going on than just the issue in the title.

Does your husband stick up for you or is he beholden to his Mother? ie. are you a team?

She is staying for 10 WEEKS?!?!?! Does she live in some far flung country?!?

If you're not happy with her taking the baby up to her room all day then you need to say so. Your house, your rules.

If your MIL isn't happy with this then she can go and stay elsewhere or go home. Your DH can tell her this!

MojitoNoIce69 · Today 10:21
**
Thank you for your messages. It’s really helpful.
MIL feels she can look after the baby better than me and criticises everything.
I let her take the baby to try and keep the peace but I now feel empowered to say no

How bloody dare she?! Why the hell doesn’t your husband stamp on this?

Is your MIL from a different country than where you live?

YANBU to feel that way an all. More unreasonable to think your MIL’s behaviour is in any way normal!

10 weeks with the kind of domineering MIL who thinks she knows better than you how to care for your own baby and kidnaps said baby and takes her to her room all day? Dear God! OP you deserve a medal. Why the hell is still staying with you for 10 weeks?????? 10 mins would be about as long as I could manage if my MIL had been like that 🏅

Remember it's your home, your child and your rules. Don't 'keep the peace' at yours and your babies expense

Do you come from a culture where unswerving subservience to the elders is the norm, @MojitoNoIce69 ?

Fucking hell.

This is so bad for your baby. A ten WEEKS old baby needs its mum, the end.

MIL cannot take care of anyone’s baby better than their mum. And deserves to be called out as the shit grandmother, controlling, playing-babies nutjob she is for even daring to try.

Stick up for yourself and YOUR baby and send the monster-in-law home, now. This needs nipping in the bud.

You let someone take your baby from you? Don't. Get your MIL out of your house

That's awful - your DH needs to intervene

D) start the anti biotics!

She normally takes the baby to her room and I won’t see her all day.
Seriously, how can this be true? Who could stand their 6 month old being away from them in the same house all day?

its strikes me that A) you shouldn't have allowed your Mil to do this in the first place and B) its time to stop it now. also C) don't allow it to restart.

She normally takes the baby to her room and I won’t see her all day. YABU for allowing this!

Are you from a culture where this is normal? Do you actually believe she is more capable of looking after your baby than you are? Because I simply can’t fathom allowing my in-laws to stay in my home for ten weeks (!) and play at being Mummy to my baby. Absolutely not a chance. They’d never dare, but if they did they’d be out my house and DH would back me up.

You sound incredibly passive about this - she’s your baby, you need to get a lot more assertive about what is best for her. That includes being with her Mummy and Daddy most of the time and not spending all day every day with MIL in a separate room.

I’d also be slightly worried about MIL’s mental health, wanting to be shut in a room all day every day with someone else’s sick infant is not a normal or healthy thing.

Why is she taking the baby into her room all day? That's very strange behaviour

Not the point of your thread but scarlet fever is strep throat and we were told it should always be treated with the antibiotics. It can turn quite nasty.

It's very bizarre that your MIL is taking the baby to her room all day - why on earth would you allow this?? Tell her you're keeping the baby in the lounge from now on and she's welcome to spend time with you there. You need to grow some backbone OP.

I am so skeptical of posts like this because how tf would anyone let their MIL take their baby and stay locked up in a bedroom all day.
She is not in charge here- your house, your baby. Stand up for yourself and your child and tell her that is she welcome to tag along with you during the day but she can not take your baby for the full day into her room. If she doesn't like that then quite frankly, she can piss off.