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AIBU?

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Original poster

To do our own Christmas dinner?

133 replies

Chrissstmasdinn · 29/10/2024 09:34

So me and DH, married this year but have 3yo and 1yo. We’ve always went to either family for Christmas dinners - my mum has had more of us tbh as she’s quite pushy

We’re getting a dining table after we got rid of our island during new kitchen fitting so DH suggested why don’t we host our own dinner? Us and the kids

I liked this idea and still do! I mentioned to my family who’ve been mentioning Christmas dinners a bit and they’re fuming with me and DH

said it’s all him? That its mean of me that he should go to his mums and I should go to them with the kids?

AIBU to want to do my own dinner with my little family? We’d be going to see family before and after it

OP posts:
Teaortea · 29/10/2024 09:41

Go to parents on boxing day and the next day.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to have Christmas at home with your own family. Kids want to stay home and play with their new presents and you get to make your own Christmas day traditions.

Your wider family will get used it.

mynameiscalypso · 29/10/2024 09:40

Once our DS turned 3, we said that we were only going to do Christmas at home (and the year before was lockdown anyway). We have said we're happy to host alternate sides of the family and travel to see them before or after Christmas but DS would much rather stay at home and play with his toys. At some point everyone has to acknowledge that event like Christmas change, you can't recreate the same Christmas every year once people move or children arrive or new partners are added into the mix.

Singleandproud · 29/10/2024 09:39

Do you live close to your family?
It's time to make new traditions

Family trip to the Panto and a meal out Christmas eve (our local theatre has a fab restaurant) for the whole extended family, although you might want an aisle seat with the baby it's not unusual for them to find the booing a bit much.
Christmas day at yours for your family and what ever traditions you want.

Boxing day playing with toys, meet up with family for a walk and then back to yours for left overs (other people can bring theirs too) and do extended family presents, children show off their new gifts and then have dinner

WYorkshireRose · 29/10/2024 09:37

Never ceases to amaze me how much parents are willing to compromise their relationships with their adult DC by trying to manipulate and blackmail them into doing things they don't want to do, purely because it's what they'd prefer.

YANBU OP - stay at home.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 29/10/2024 09:36

As someone who is currently dealing with the fallout of a massive tantrum by certain family members over something utterly inconsequential, my advice to you is don't negotiate with terrorists.

Have the Christmas that you want. If they cause drama, just say you will see them when they have calmed down.

BabyCloud · 29/10/2024 09:35

I would stay home so the kids can enjoy Christmas in their own house. I wouldn’t feel guilty about doing what I wanted.

Mygreyhair · 29/10/2024 09:35

Don’t overthink this. You just need to say ‘we are eating at home this year’ every time it’s brought up.

takealettermsjones · 29/10/2024 09:34

Absolutely do it!