Age 56. Can't be arsed at work anymore.

But the question is, why did you end up doing something that you aren't enjoying?

Did you have false illusions when you went into it?
Has the profession changed?

You must have transferable skills.

And if you have a partner, is there a conversation to be had around them stepping up their career and you stepping down a bit?

I don't think the things you say would be 'sacrifices' are necessarily that.
Basically, you're putting up with doing something you don't like for the sake of your children. They'd make new friends, their hobbies would go with them.

When they leave home and maybe moves hundreds of miles away themselves, will you regret not doing what you wanted to do?

It’s not tragic. Most on this thread have had long careers and many still enjoy their actual job
It’s mostly the corporate bullshit bingo that we’re tired of.

Let us get on with doing a good job in peace without the role play, objectives and nonsensical jargon.

I am a bit younger but feel similarly. I actually do quite like my job but it's relatively 'easy' - I wfh for 3/5 days and am part time. My last manager was a bit older than me and we didn't even have appraisals (I work in a v small organisation) as we worked so closely together and got on so well that she would tell me if there were any issues and pay rises were not linked to performance. Now I have a new manager and she's v enthusiastic, which is good, but no doubt after a year she will see that her ideas will not be received so well by the board of trustees.
I am staying there for the time being as the thought of moving to somewhere with quarterly appraisals and KPIs fill me with dread. I had this in my last job and hated it - was such BS.
I don't know if I want to retire in 7 years or so. I like having a purpose to my day - getting up and going to work etc. - but it depends on how my health is and what DH is doing and if we still need my income (would hope DCs will both be working f/t in good jobs as they will be in their late 20s then).

Feel exactly the same. Doesn’t help that a few slightly older friends have already retired and I’m watching them enjoy their new lives, whilst treading water with my own.

The main reason women have alleged equality and "opportunities" in the workplace isn't because the scales fell from the eyes of the menfolk who suddenly realised women are human beings capable of more than breeding and knitting, it was largely due to the realisation that it would benefit the economy in some respects. The price of everything now has it factored in that there are dual income households to pay for it.

See also the barely repressed resentment of women living off men.

Alot of the progress women have made has been at a cost - either choosing work over children for example, or finding themselves run absolutely ragged trying to do both. Sometimes no amount of household fiscal safeguarding can protect one from the vagaries of the market such as geopolitics, corporate restructuring, and technological progress moving so fast that suddenly one's 20 year career is reduced to "there's an app for that".

Obviously these things affect men too, but dealing with the fall out is often harder for women especially if they have a family to feed.

Unfortunately no matter how we try to dress it up, raise our vibrations and practise gratitude, society is still male centric in so many ways. What's the equivalent to the very real "old boys network"? A coven?

I am not trying to decry the hard work women have done trying to achieve a more equitable society in regards to work at all. I'm trying to point out it's still a Sisyphean task in some respects.

And it doesn't help when twats like a certain Canadian psychologist starts promoting quackery like "evolutionary psychology" in my humble opinion.

Sorry, I'm in a right mood today with a side order of the morbs. I'll just try harder.

I have absolutely no problem with them but it should be a personal choice and not something mandated as the company were dictating. In fact the one member of my team that massively objected to them mandating it would have been he/she but had no desire to broadcast it on all email traffic. It was the mandatory nature of the request that I felt I could not fully support or make others do against their will.

I spent 20 years in the corporate world and aged 40 had a complete career change and it made all the difference. Life is too short to spend years being in a job/career you hate.

Its not that simple.

I earn a lot. 6 figures. The family budget is dependent on it.

The things i enjoy doing and find fulfilling, are not lucrative! I enjoy playing the piano. I'm nowhere near good enough to perform in any paid capacity and teaching would earn me approx 1/6th of what i earn now, at best, and I'm not a very good teacher either (lack patience).

I enjoy baking/cooking but would hate being a chef in a high pressured environment, also these things basically pay very little.

I think I'd have enjoyed something medical related but i would hate working shifts/long hours away from my children, and the roles that are more flexible are more poorly paid.

Whenever i look at things i could do that i would find more "fulfilling", they would involve huge sacrifices for my children, like moving hundreds of miles away from family & friends to live in a cheaper house, giving up their hobbies. As a mum i feel i can't do that.

My people!!

Im 57 and have some decent pensions. Can I start taking them now? Will I get taxed if I take out £60k to pay off the mortgage?

hope you don’t mind me asking OP - seems like this might also be a factor in your life

To add some balance, I intend to work until 70. I'm lucky in that I work for myself, but I like the mental challenge and it keeps me busy. Perhaps I'll change my mind when I'm in my 60's, but as I control my diary the freedom is great.

I feel same and I’m 46. Don’t think I can afford to retire until 60 as huge mortgage and my youngest won’t be 18 until I hit 60. DH 5 years younger than me.

id say plan plan plan. We’ve done the sums and I “should” be able to go at 60 but if the DC want to go to uni, I may go 3 days a week between 60-63.

if we downsized I could go earlier but we only bought our house 2 years ago so want to enjoy living in it.

most days I don’t mind my job and I don’t get Sunday night dread, but it’s the egos and corporate bullshit I can’t stand (law) which would make me go if I could financially

Believe me when I tell you the 50-60 olds were once bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, fully on board, determined to make initiatives work.
@rhubay nails it with Disrespect for older people's learning costs businesses a fortune.

I hear you OP. I was extremely fortunate to be able to retire at 58 on a voluntary early severance package. Best thing I ever did.

I’m 53 and feel exactly the same and I have been obsessed with retiring for a long time. I sit in meetings where some new initiative is being enthusiastically discussed and just think that we did this 20 years ago but better and with more money (local government). I feel tired, cynical and despite being middle management level I have so many layers of management above me I have no relationship with any of them and don’t give a shit what they think. I think I’m going to set up on my own as a consultant.

Oh I have found my people. Just about to hit 50 and I do not know how I am going to make it into my 60s before retiring. I have done the maths and there is no way I can not retire any earlier than 63ish. I am already part time. Sob!

I have changed jobs/careers and it isn't work. It's me. I have found some fab hobbies and I love them but just as hobbies not to make money from.

I just want to be left alone at work. No daily meetings, no buzzwords, no personal development, no happy bunnies, no team building, no 1-2-1's, no mandatory bl**dy e-learning, no having to 'be nice'.

Just let me log on, do my work, wiggle my mouse because I am not doing extra just what I am paid to do and for the love of all things holy, do not at anytime expect anything of me.

I feel better getting that out.

Mid 40s. I like my job and I like working (ND and the structure is good for me), but it does get pretty wearing trying to fake enthusiasm for the same old rubbish.

It goes in a cycle - year one, let's try this brilliant new idea! Year two - brilliant new idea is not going that well. Year three/four - the not new any more idea withers and dies/is quietly shelved. Year five - change of leadership and bright eyed new manager comes in and says "I've had this great idea that we should try..." When I was earlier in my career I didn't understand why some of my older colleagues were quietly cynical when someone came in with a new idea - now I completely get it.

The best advice I was given, is that for most people work is just a game. Don't take it too seriously and don't get emotionally invested, because you are only ever a number on a spreadsheet. Do what you need to do to turn the handle and be productive, but don't put it ahead of your own health, happiness, family or friends.

The majority of people in the UK don’t subscribe to gender ideology. Pronouns are the thin end of the wedge of a harmful ideology that has homophobia and misogyny at its core.

It’s not about making anyone feel comfortable. What does having she/her on my email signature achieve? Who actually benefits? I don’t understand why anyone other than a tiny handful of people would have interest in pronouns.

Should we declare our star sign, religion or sexuality on our emails? They’re just as irrelevant to our jobs

I can relate. I'm your age, been in my sector for 30 years, now senior manager (puppy handler!) But have another 12 to go. I cope by contributing what I do have, which if not constant excitement over 'new' (aka old with a new label, but still flawed) ideas, then its my knowledge and experience. I listen patiently to their ideas and enjoy their enthusiasm. Then will encourage them to reflect on whether it would work exactly as they think...what will happen to A in the event of B? What changes have there been that you think will mitigate C that happened the last time we did D? Etc. And occasionally, tbf, they do have something. Because there are areas that their more recent education, their higher level of awareness of trends, and willingness to burn the midnight oil keeping informed, mean they do know or have thought of something new, and I learn from them.

Nodding along. Good will towards my employer has ran out. I suppose I do a version of quiet quitting but pick up some corporate initiatives. Saves being allocated something awful and brings some variety.
I am trying to find positives in the work. Doesn't come easily. For me, retraining at nearly 50 does not stack up. Best to maximise benefits from where I am whilst it is still just about bearable.
Love reading FIRE stories.

Unfortunately I suspect most of us took time off for maternities and then got overlooked or stagnated in our careers. Now we are bored
or perhaps not but still undervalued. There is still a lot of sexism and misogyny in the workplace. I am almost the only one of my peers still working.

In my case younger women I'd coached and mentored were overtaking me, and I quit before resentment about being taken for granted really set in. I like working self employed to my own timetable but I still miss that job.

Being fully retired doesn't appeal to me.

Isn't it tragic though that girls are far more educated these days than 100 years ago, more professions are open to women, we strove for equality, yet this thread is full of women who just hate their work.
Many men are just as disillusioned at 55-60.

I'm guessing you're in the civil service OP? YANBU.

Haha me too 😂

I agree they shouldn’t be mandated. But I just don’t understand why people wouldn’t use them to allow others to feel comfortable. It’s like 30 years ago insisting on using the term ‘husband’ or ‘wife’, when ‘partner’ allowed gay people to avoid outing themselves if they didn’t want to. Now it’s common for straight people to use that term. It’s progress. If people don’t want to consider how to make others feel comfortable at work, they’re probably best off retiring.