To want DH to say yes to a cat!

oh we used to have a cat who loved to play fetch!

I think sometimes people can be swayed, other times they are no I genuinely don't like them, only you know which he is

I was never a cat person and then a neighbours cat decided I absolutely needed to become one. My dad has always had dogs and said cats are "nasty bitey scratchy things and you won't ever catch me near one"

This is him climbing on the floor to give my dog type lump of a cat belly rubs

He doesn't scratch, claw, is happy to be touched all over including belly and paws, and is basically a living teddy bear who likes to play fetch like a dog

Oh, I don’t particularly want one either! I get you on how ‘canine’ some breeds are, though.

DDs would love a pet. I'd quite enjoy them

But DH wouldn't. He doesn't want the responsibility of care, sorting out arrangements when we want a night away, getting attached then something happening etc. So we don't have one.

DD might need to bring home animals for the weekend/part of school holidays soon... and he's fine with that. Weve dog sat for a few days. He just doesn't want it permanently.

i wouldn't do that... thats not very fair on DH. owning a pet should be a joint or family decision it shouldn't just be forced upon somone. Yes i was sneaky with getting two but in my defence they were siblings and the rescue wanted them housed together, so DH agreed to take the two

Kids don’t get a say. They aren’t paying, they likely aren’t doing the work and they aren’t committing to fifteen plus years of caring for it. They’ll be independent adults out the nest by the time the cat is middle aged.

I’m with your DH to be honest, I wouldn’t want a cat. Some people, like me, just don’t particularly like animals (awaiting comments that I’m “weird”, “psychopathic” “can’t be trusted” etc) and find that the work, expense and hassle of a pet just isn’t worth it. I think it’s much more responsible and respectful to the animal to say no than to get a pet that’s resented. I don’t have some amazing reason beyond “I just don’t like them and I don’t want one” and my spouse endlessly going on about it would probably result in me banning the topic too. At some point you have to either accept “no” or if it’s that important to you, split up.

As for just unilaterally bringing one home anyway, it’d probably be the beginning of the end of my marriage if DH pulled that stunt.

ah i remember begging my DH for a cat... he had never had pets, i however grew up on a farm, we had every pet under the sun but my passion was cats. for many years i had to go without because my DD's were allergice.

eventually time came round where it was possible to own a cat and i begged and pleaded and in the end my DH gave in, and allowed me 1 (one) cat on the condition that it never slept on the bed.

we got TWO cats and they both sleep on the bed :)

I'd just get one.

Just get one. What’s he gonna do when the little fluffer is already there? It’s too late, husband, too late. 😁

I love my cats but not everyone is a cat lover.
Your husband doesn't want one and a cat shouldn't be introduced to a home where one person is dead set against their presence. The potential cat's welfare in my opinion should be more important than whether you and your children want one.

A bengal has been bred to be pretty much unlike a domestic cat, so you are right there. As long as DH doesn’t mind being savaged occasionally , it should be just the ticket.

Ah - just foster one for a couple of weeks

@DarkBlueStocking might he be swayed by a bengal or maine coon? i have both and though cats both breeds are very dog like in different ways

Everyone has to agree to a family pet. DH hates cats, so we will never have one. I don’t want a dog, so we won’t get one of those either.

Would he agree to look at cats with you?(if one 'picked' him he may feel differently.)

We had similar and then in one of the Covid lockdowns the neighbour’s cat decided to move in with us for a couple of weeks and DH really saw how she became one of the family and our DC benefitted from having her around. After she went home (we genuinely thought she was a stray and hadn’t deliberately stolen her!!) we got a kitten of our own. It hasn’t been easy. He’s had a few (expensive) health issues and destroyed some furniture but on balance we’re all happier with him. So I’m not sure what the answer is but maybe if there’s a way you can test out having a cat it might help?

What a grump! Cats are great.