Once a cheat?

Well she never changed and I'm not intrested in anything shes doing, she known for it she's been married more times than Henry the eighth and I'm I wasn't commenting on me .

I don’t believe that “once a cheat, always a cheat”, people change circumstances change. If you want to keep her as a friend, you need to back off and let her live her life without judging her for her choices. You can’t tell her how to live her life.

This isn't your business. You cannot dictate to someone how they live their life. If she talks to you and asks advice fair enough otherwise unless you want to lose her friendship I would just MYB.

Ive had my fill of cheats, once a cheat and a liar always one, a leopard never changes its spots , I wouldn't trust them a inch, I nearly got caught out but I I wouldn't marry her as I knew what she was about, so beware male and female if they cheated once they will do it again .

Your friend is delusional and the best you can do is play along and watch 💩 hit the fan.

I ‘cheated’ on EXH, putting it in quotations as he’d been cheating on me and abusing me for years, I met someone kind and fell into a fling, I don’t regret it if I’m honest.

When I met my now DH years later I knew I would never do that again because he’s all I need.

My husband cheated just once and told me, he has always had a high sex drive and mine was pretty much 0 after kids then peri (now on hrt so somewhat normal)it is strange but before that happened i was always insecure now i feel stronger and actaully trust him more! He knows what he will lose if he does it again!!! And im in a better place so could manage without him!💪💪

I do not think I would ever relax fully in the relationship if this was the foundation.

It’s not your relationship so I think you need to mind your own business. You’ve brought it up with her but she doesn’t want to hear what you have to say so just leave it. You will just end up ruining your friendship

My uncle was an old goat who would try it on with any available female. He finally stopped cheating when he got older and realized he wouldn't get the opportunities for much longer and had better settle for what he'd got.

People do change, but it’s also fair to wonder if past behavior might be a predictor of future actions. Your friend’s belief that she’ll be enough for him suggests she’s hopeful—and she may see something in him that you don’t. But, at the same time, it’s completely understandable for you to feel protective of her and want to make sure she’s not setting herself up for heartbreak.

It sounds like you’ve been really respectful and gentle in raising this with her, and even though it might have touched a nerve, you did it out of care. It's hard to be in this kind of situation as a friend, wanting the best for someone but also respecting their choices. Just being there for her, as you clearly have been, will matter a lot in the long run

I'm sure his wife thought she was "enough" for him once, too.
I think the odds aren't in your friend's favour and personally, I wouldn't want to keep wondering if I was enough, whilst it's him who can't keep it in his trousers.

No I don't think so.

I think you can fall in love with another person. I don't think that's necessarily something that has to be recycled throughout your life.

She's an adult. It's not your decision to make and you should not influence her.

The old Dog with 2 dicks be onto the next in no time

I mean they clearly both have the same kind of morals so his behaviour probably doesn't faze her.

I don't believe it to be true. I know people who cheated because they were unhappy in their relationships then stayed faithful to the replacements for decades afterwards.

I happy people cheat. People don't just cheat for the sake of it. If they are happy with their replacement then they don't cheat again.

I don't know how anyone can be the other DW and know about it and vice versa for the man it's 🤮 anyway I wouldn't trust a man personally who cheated that's my opinion I would always think he would do it to me thankfully I'm not single and married and wouldn't even ever distrust my dh

If he did it for you he’ll do it to you.

I've cheated twice in the past.....one relationship where he mentally abused me for basically 8yrs, calling me fat and saying no one was desperate to have me....so I cheated! 2nd was my 1st marriage, my ex husband was/is an alcoholic and alcohol was his priority, I was daft and thought I'd change him....I cheated with my now husband, we've been together 10yrs and have 2 children and 4 angel babies, which could have broke us but never once have I ever thought about cheating.....we are in a loving equal respectful relationship....both my exes when I tried to leave threatened suicide, 2nd did try once we split up.....he's now on his 2nd divorce after a year of marriage and 1st got done for DV on his next partner to me

She could cheat to once a home wrecker always a home wrecker

She must have very low self confidence and he is probably a big bull shitter.

I feel for her as he'll obviously do the same again. He was probably trying to win back his wife for a while after being chucked out, all the while sleeping with your friend telling her what she wanted to hear.

Nothing is certain.

But I think that once someone has found they can get away with something, the repercussions weren't too bad and the rewards were immense (ego boost, passionate sex made more exciting because of the secrecy, general highs of a new romance) then I think they have crossed a boundary and will be more likely to do it again.

No one can possibly claim that human behaviour is so simple or easily categorised in terms of black and white.

Is someone who has cheated more likely to cheat again than someone who never has?

Yes, very probably.

Is that absolute and definitive? Of course not.

Caution is advised, of course.

I don’t believe this because I know a case where this hasn’t been true. I know a couple who met when they were both married. They both married young and were unhappy. They had an affair for a year, split up because of the guilt and went non contact. Their individual marriages both resulted in divorce. Years later, they found themselves working together, rekindled things and have been together for 20 years. They’ve never looked elsewhere.

I think that’s very different to people who are just self-sabotagers or hugely selfish and who spend their lives cheating on DPs and spouses. There’s no changing them because they probably need therapy to work out why they keep ruining good things.

No. It's a massive oversimplification and assumes all cheating is identical. It isn't.