Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Too tired to be sociable with DD's bf

204 replies

pigalow27 · 27/10/2024 20:55

I have had a hideous weekend with my DD being really pissed off with me. Basically she was due to come home from uni for reading week on Saturday morning but late on Thursday night, she changed her tickets and came home Friday afternoon instead. I wasn't terribly bothered either way. However Friday was last day of this half term. I'm SLT and exhausted. Mostly work 60-70 hour weeks so by the end of the week (especially the end of a term or half term) I am totally exhausted and fit for nothing. The house looks like a war zone as I work all weekend also.
DD's boyfriend arrived while I was still at work. When I got back she immediately asked me to start clearing up and go and get a takeaway so he could stay and eat. I said I wasn't feeling up for this and it wasn't the plan as I hadn't really expected her til Saturday.
I ended up leaving and going to my mum's even though all I wanted was bed. I wasn't that pleased he was there within 30 mins of her arriving home but not that fussed as long as I wasn't dragged into being sociable or being forced to start clearing up and tidying after a 70 hour week!!
DD now in a bad mood with me as she says I embarrassed her and made him feel uncomfortable. AIBU?

OP posts:
MasterBeth · 27/10/2024 21:04

She sounds rude, and so do you.

sprigatito · 27/10/2024 21:03

My uni-aged child is welcome to turn up unannounced whenever he wants to, and his partner is equally welcome. This works because they know they will have to take us as they find us, no standing on ceremony here! Any child of mine who ordered me to clear up or go and fetch a takeaway would get the shortest of shrifts.

Brefugee · 27/10/2024 21:01

pigalow27 · 27/10/2024 20:55

I have had a hideous weekend with my DD being really pissed off with me. Basically she was due to come home from uni for reading week on Saturday morning but late on Thursday night, she changed her tickets and came home Friday afternoon instead. I wasn't terribly bothered either way. However Friday was last day of this half term. I'm SLT and exhausted. Mostly work 60-70 hour weeks so by the end of the week (especially the end of a term or half term) I am totally exhausted and fit for nothing. The house looks like a war zone as I work all weekend also.
DD's boyfriend arrived while I was still at work. When I got back she immediately asked me to start clearing up and go and get a takeaway so he could stay and eat. I said I wasn't feeling up for this and it wasn't the plan as I hadn't really expected her til Saturday.
I ended up leaving and going to my mum's even though all I wanted was bed. I wasn't that pleased he was there within 30 mins of her arriving home but not that fussed as long as I wasn't dragged into being sociable or being forced to start clearing up and tidying after a 70 hour week!!
DD now in a bad mood with me as she says I embarrassed her and made him feel uncomfortable. AIBU?

she got back earlier, waited for you to get home then started ordering you to clean up and arrange food?

I'd have sent her back to uni.

Redplenty · 27/10/2024 20:58

So she got back before you finished work, and then her bf arrived after that (also before you finished work)? She could've done a quick tidy of crucial areas and sorted a takeaway. Probably a bit rude of you to just leave when you haven't seen her (or him) so I get why she's annoyed about that.