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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask why money is sometimes quite a taboo subject to talk about with other people?

132 replies

ThisGreenDog · 27/10/2024 20:17

I’ve noticed that money seems to be a bit of a no-go topic in many conversations. People can feel awkward or even offended if it’s brought up, whether it’s about salaries, personal finances, or even just the cost of things. AIBU to wonder why this is?

Is it a cultural thing, or does it come down to privacy? Maybe it’s about not wanting to seem like we’re comparing, or is it something else entirely? Do you find talking about money uncomfortable, or do you think it’s something people should be more open about?

OP posts:
OnarealhorseIride · 27/10/2024 20:27

I always thought that there were three things that should never be asked in British culture:
1 how much do you earn
2 who did you vote for in the election
3 what are your bedroom preferences

Doggymummar · 27/10/2024 20:27

I am not private about it, but I know some are

LittleRedRidingHoody · 27/10/2024 20:26

I think as much as people say 'it's only money', it's an area rife with insecurities and judgements. On the rare occasions I've shared financial details with friends I've felt either envied or pitied - this might be 100% in my head!

I'm committed to being very transparent at work/networking though. Women tend to err on the side of caution when negotiating salaries and we need more champions and people who will have the uncomfortable conversations! Hate it in 'real' life though 😂

Miley1967 · 27/10/2024 20:25

I got into a conversation yesterday with some friends and ended up feeling really cross at a very old friend who seems to be trying to cheat the system. I honestly wished we hadn't started on the subject as it's really altered the way I feel about her now.
In the past, friends have disclosed that their partners were doing second jobs and not declaring cash in hand earnings and to be honest that has also changed my view of people as it wasn't insignificant amounts that were being talked about.

MrsSchrute · 27/10/2024 20:24

Skybluecoat · 27/10/2024 20:23

It’s personal. I wouldn’t dream of asking even my closest friends how much they earn (unless they had asked me for relevant advice)

It is like asking someone how much they weigh.

But why wouldn't you ask them? Would you tell them what you earn?

I'm with you OP, I don't really get the secrecy.

Skybluecoat · 27/10/2024 20:23

It’s personal. I wouldn’t dream of asking even my closest friends how much they earn (unless they had asked me for relevant advice)

It is like asking someone how much they weigh.

Soyare · 27/10/2024 20:20

That’s actually a really interesting question.

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