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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel sad how my life turned out?

55 replies

abonymousAnon · 27/10/2024 20:06

I have 2 young kids in primary school. Moved to London around 12 years ago. I’ve always been quiet and reserved but had some good friends who I’ve lost contact with. The thing is when I moved to London I never really felt like I made any friends. Pre-kids My work colleagues were not very friendly and I didn’t have time for hobbies as work took up so much time. Work people would go out for dinner and drinks and not invite me for example.

I feel the school mums not very friendly either and the nice ones seem to have a very busy life with family living nearby and friends since childhood to keep them busy. I just feel so lonely. I’ve really tried but truthfully I have limited energy and it takes a lot for me to be sociable. I’m glad to have my space sometimes but most times I feel so alone. How would you go about changing your life if you were me?

OP posts:
Traybaked · 27/10/2024 20:16

Do you genuinely want friends? You also say it takes a lot to be sociable. I agree and on balance I would rather not have the pressure of having to meet up regularly with other mums. I find it a huge chore to maintain the friendships I do have and do it for the DC rather than me.

The fact you find fault with other groups might actually be because you aren't a hugely social person. That's ok! So are you actually lonely or just bored? Do you need people to do something with but not WITH like going to an exercise class or a craft thing where you see people but don't have to maintain friendships outside?

Mrsttcno1 · 27/10/2024 20:14

Do you have any hobbies OP? Some of the best friends I’ve made as an adult have been through hobby groups like I go to a local running group and now have lots of friends there. Meeting people that way gives you some common ground right from the off, and something to talk about!

Original poster
abonymousAnon · 27/10/2024 20:12

Yes I do have a partner but he’s constantly working. He has no time for hobbies either.

OP posts:
Original poster
abonymousAnon · 27/10/2024 20:11

@Abigaillovesholidays thank you. I did look at that but I felt embarrassed as you had to put a picture of yourself up. I know I’m being irrational but that kind of makes me uncomfortable. I don’t use social media at all due to my job so maybe it’s just that I’m not used to posting a picture and details of myself.

OP posts:
Abigaillovesholidays · 27/10/2024 20:09

Do you have a partner?
There are apps to meet people like peanut