To wish we hadn’t bought this house

OP that's just the nature of new build estates, it was the same for us, our style house was a lot cheaper months before ours, and the last houses built paid the most.

But your DH is the issue here, as has been said.

If you google the address it’s freely available. It’s very dickish to bring it up and discuss though. I’d tell him you’re not interested in discussing house prices and if he persists, I’d just blank him.

OP your DH sounds like a dick. The leaky stuff and paintwork can be sorted so don’t stress. Get a plan for sorting out DIY stuff.

OP, do you understand that in a marriage (with a few exceptions) you own everything jointly. So it as much your house as his. I’m afraid you’re being bullied- is this how you want to live your life?

I guess you probably sold a house at the peek of house prices too? house prices rise and fall. We wouldn’t get our money back if we sold our house right now (bought 2 1/2 years ago) but we’re not selling so I don’t care. However, I’d be so irritated if our neighbour pointed that out.
Your neighbour is a nob and so is your DH.

Sorry but why does your husband think you 'didn't contribute'??? How does he think he was able to go out and work/earn in order to buy this house?? He may have put the money in but you've put in all your time and work making it a home.
If you love this prince among men enough to stay, ignore your neighbour - every single house I've bought has been more expensive than it was when the previous owners bought it. That's how it works.

Why don’t you tell your neighbour to fuck off? How often do you talk to him about this? It sounds constant, you need to shut it down.

Do you actually not like the house, or is it just his negativity bringing you down?

4 years ago houses were selling very rapidly , the prices in some areas more or less doubled over night , don’t be disappointed with what you paid , it was what you needed to pay at that moment to secure a place to live , what your neighbour or anyone else paid 6 months prior has nothing to do with it , house moving and prices were very different during lockdown than any other time so not comparable

your neighbour has found your weak spot and is an unpleasant person to niggle away and make you feel wretched and hard done by , either ignore him or change the subject to a positive upbeat one every single time , tell him you are not interested in his house price gossip

your house is a family house , it doesn’t belong to just your husband it belongs to the married couple and that is you and your husband , if you were to file for Divorce he would find this out

save what you can and find a good solicitor

My new build house has increased in value approx 80k since we bought 7 years ago. Over this length of time you would expect the price to go up

What a shit situation
Firstly you're husband is a dick. It should always be 2 yes's or it's a no with any big purchases like buying a house, you both have to love it as you are living in it day in day out. 'It's my money' 🙄 that would induce so much rage in me and I would be running!
Secondly you're neighbour is also a dick for keep bringing this up, what good does it do?

Sorry OP but I would be leaving.

1. Tell your neighbour the house is your home so the value is irrelevant.

1. Your husband is a prick. How on earth have you managed 12 years with him? And why do people have children with someone so controlling??

Well you paid what you thought it was worth. You had been looking at other things and felt it was a fair price at the time, what other people paid now or in the past is irrelevant.
And what’s with the moaning that your husband “let the house get ruined”? It’s not only his fault that paint chips or leaks happen and nor is it only his responsibility to fix it.

You're thinking house price rises are the problem when it's your Husband that is the problem.

You have bought the house so wishing that you didn't is a waste of energy.

Start completely ignoring your neighbour.

I agree that you should get a job to help you get out of this situation.

In the OP it says yes, they have kids.

You are overly concerned with the neighbour when you should be getting a full time job in order to leave your husband
I understand it's hard. But he doesn't value you
Fortunately the courts would value your contribution as a sahm upon divorce. You'd probably be better off financially

It doesn't matter if you overpaid for your house. It's better than renting. It will probably stay the same value - or it won't- who cares as long as the mortgage gets paid and you have a roof over your families head. Someone will buy it if you put it up to sell it - you guys bought yours. Think about all the people who bought during lockdown and paid over the odds

In terms of the house looking scruffy either DIY it or save to pay for a painter. It's not difficult to get a long brush and paint over leak marks

So what? Is he Kirsty Allsop?

My neighbour used to throw rocks at us and shout racist things but he wasn't right, he was a dick.

Probably from RightMove and there's another site that tells you what the house last sold for-or simply the previous neighbours told him.
But yes, the neighbour is stunningly unhelpful.

I have never posted on a thread before but please listen to PPs’ comments on your husband’s attitude. You deserve better, and his approach to your finances is disrespectful and very troubling. Please educate yourself on financial abuse.

You're focusing your attention on the wrong person here - just ignore your neighbour or tell him you don't wish to discuss houses prices anymore thank you. Your OH on the other hand sounds a manipulative bastard and you'd be well advised to leave and buy your own place.
Do you have children?

Your neighbour is annoying, stop talking to him.

Your husband sounds controlling financially, and I’d be willing to bet emotionally also. You’re married and there’s no my money / your money, surely? He’s going to live in a house with a leaking shower unless his wife pays for repairing it?

House prices have increased massively in recent years.

Ignore your neighbour.

Well done for posting OP. Hopefully the good advice and comments will help you get a different perspective on this problem.

Your neighbour is being deliberately mean to you. He perhaps gets a kick out of doing this to you. Block him. Don’t be afraid to be rude to him, walk away when he speaks to you.

Your husband is a problem you have to address. Does he give you money for the children, day to day expenses, “housekeeping”?

You are in a very bad marriage. That’s your issue, not the house. You sound complacent over being downtrodden and undervalued by him.

As an aside, £190k means nothing unless we know the % difference. 2021-2022 was a very volatile time for house prices.

Three things:

1. It is not unusual for new builds to go up a few hundred K 4 years after being built - at least in my town in the midlands.
2. Your neighbour is awful - stop talking to him
3. You need to divorce your husband and use your (ie what he previously thought of as ‘his’) money to buy a property that you like.

Honestly, your DH is awful, he doesn’t respect you and he is financially abusing you. You appear to also have an awful neighbour-this is just coincidence. You don’t need to put up with this and once you have left him, you will never regret it.