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Original poster

To confess this and ask for help

62 replies

imanidiot222 · 25/10/2024 20:59

Hey guys,

Hoping to get some perspective here. First of all I know I made a really poor decision and I'm ashamed of it.

Yesterday I got back from a holiday abroad and I met a guy there. We hit it off from the first day and ended up sleeping together. He has a girlfriend. We still continue to spend the week together and had sex multiples times, went for dinner etc.

He said he had never intended to meet someone and catch feelings or cheat on his girlfriend but there was just a connection between us. I also hate that I went with someone knowing they had a girlfriend. I had the most amazing time with him but he said that he can only contact me in the days when he's at work.

I'm sat here tonight feeling super low. Ashamed, guilty, but mainly just missing him and wanting to speak to him even though he's a cheat! And I'm not any better! That paired with the crushing holiday blues and knowing we won't see each other again just feels a lot.

Any advice or words of wisdom without being too harsh, please?

OP posts:
Pandasnacks · 25/10/2024 21:23

Don't message him again, block his number and move on OP, it won't be easy to move on but don't drag it out by messaging him. He enjoyed his holiday fling and gone back to his real life, you need to do the same

Babybelle23 · 25/10/2024 21:23

Even if you “win” him, what’s the prize here? You will be sitting at home while he’s off lining up the next one. Block and move on.

MumOfOneAllAlone · 25/10/2024 21:21

Sorry op, sounds like he was after a holiday fling and now he's back to reality, has zero plans to leave his partner

Best to cut ties and start getting over him x

Justleaveitblankthen · 25/10/2024 21:20

Bimbo? 😬
Welcome to Mumsnet OP, you are going to get absolutely slaughtered here.

Of course it will be all your own fault, nowt to do with the partnered up male wanting to get his Dick wet.
I Never is 🤨

Get your hard hat on.

user2312 · 25/10/2024 21:18

countrybumpkunt · 25/10/2024 21:10

Having been cheated on and the bimbo knowing he was married with 4 kids makes me hate people like you !!! Its wrong and you should be deeply ashamed. How wud u feel !

That's it blame the OW not the man 🙄😴
OP has already stated how bad she feels.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 25/10/2024 21:13

My best advice would be to call it a misadventure and move on. Get tested, definitely, you really don't know where it's been.

countrybumpkunt · 25/10/2024 21:10

Having been cheated on and the bimbo knowing he was married with 4 kids makes me hate people like you !!! Its wrong and you should be deeply ashamed. How wud u feel !

Pippa12 · 25/10/2024 21:07

Stick Netflix on and watch a few episodes of Benidorm with Mateo ‘catching feelings’ for every woman that graces the solana. It’ll bring you back down to earth with a giggle.

Nothing good will come of pining after this man as it’s likely he’s moved on to the next ‘tourist’. Perhaps have a quick health check if the sex was unprotected.

OwnBrandCornflake · 25/10/2024 21:02

imanidiot222 · 25/10/2024 20:59

Hey guys,

Hoping to get some perspective here. First of all I know I made a really poor decision and I'm ashamed of it.

Yesterday I got back from a holiday abroad and I met a guy there. We hit it off from the first day and ended up sleeping together. He has a girlfriend. We still continue to spend the week together and had sex multiples times, went for dinner etc.

He said he had never intended to meet someone and catch feelings or cheat on his girlfriend but there was just a connection between us. I also hate that I went with someone knowing they had a girlfriend. I had the most amazing time with him but he said that he can only contact me in the days when he's at work.

I'm sat here tonight feeling super low. Ashamed, guilty, but mainly just missing him and wanting to speak to him even though he's a cheat! And I'm not any better! That paired with the crushing holiday blues and knowing we won't see each other again just feels a lot.

Any advice or words of wisdom without being too harsh, please?

He said he had never intended to meet someone and catch feelings or cheat on his girlfriend but there was just a connection between us

So I assume he's broken up with her now he has feelings for you

Hankunamatata · 25/10/2024 21:02

Holiday fling. Think fondly of it and cut contact

Mrsttcno1 · 25/10/2024 21:01

Block his number and forget about him, book yourself a trip to the STI clinic and hope you didn’t bring any “souvenirs” home with you

turkeymuffin · 25/10/2024 21:00

Eugh.

There's no happy ending to this.

See it how it is - a holiday fling. He's gone back to his normal life now, you need to do the same. Block and move on.