It's just a fiver

So, I'm sorry but I'm not to take food out of my child's mouth to give someone I don't know that well a present". Makes the point...

I would've hammered home the point and made her feel bad by saying "If I give you a fiver, it means that my child can't eat for two days".

I refused to put in for a collection at a previous workplace of mine and it made me very unpopular. I didn't like the people and I didn't want to spend money on them!

I guess I'm stingy, because money's not so tight that I couldn't afford to contribute, but I simply don't see the need to buy gifts for people I barely know, just because we happen to work in the same place. If they're actually a friend, I can get then something on my own. I try to be careful with money, and I'd resent being asked to spend money when I'm only there to earn!

Same

A fiver every time has a birthday adds up. I remember putting in every year for occasions, which really should've been paid for by above. When it was to turn to get a present for getting married, got bugger all!

Good on you for saying no. About 20 years ago when working in a bar there was £3 written on the outside of my payslip to say it was £3 short for someone’s birthday. I wasn’t even asked and it use to piss me off as it was nearly 1 hours pay back then.

If it’s “just a fiver” then she can cover your contribution surely?

very rude

It all depends on how many people at your workplace, and what range of grades there are.

At my workplace there is only a collection for big birthdays, a new baby or someone leaving. And for any colleague who lost their spouse. We arrange it so that the teachers put in a fiver, the (lower paid) support staff are asked to put in £3. There is no expectation to give.It seems doable. A couple of the younger staff hardly ever put in but still write on the joint card which feels a bit off. They are also the ones who have all the latest expensive makeup, new clothes etc and are out a lot. So I feel it's a bit unfair to claim they can't give 3 quid every few months when they seem to have so much disposable income (they still live at home)

You wont be the onlynone in the team whondoesnt want todo it or cannot afford to do it .
U are definiteky not u reasonable. A fiver is crazy. Anything in my booked is crazy...and pressured. Keep away and outside of the group think.. peo ple can think what thye like ..some will be quietly jealous they donr have the strength to say no, or also be helped by you saying no.

Well done for saying no.

Hopefully she will get the message andnot ask you again.

YANBU, they do this in our workplace and it’s gotten out of hand. They buy expensive gifts and then expect 20(€), the last gift was for someone who had quit after only a month and I said no, I’m pt also and I had only met the woman once.

This is why I really hate these work collections. It forces those who are keeping their financial struggles private into publicly and embarrassingly announcing it. Then having to endure the pity or the ones who don't believe it and think you're just being tight. Or HAVING to contribute purely to keep it private, and risk being extra skint until the next pay day.

I'm glad I work alone now and don't have to deal with this any more.

OP, please don't be embarrassed. From someone who would contribute just to maintain my privacy (but then struggle even more afterwards), I applaud your confidence to just say no. It might just be a fiver to your colleague, but to some of us, that's a days worth of school dinner money for one of our children.

There seems to be a never ending carousel of birthday cards that need signing in my team and even that is starting to piss me off!

We are not asked to contribute any money and nor would I. Apart from a wedding or retirement if I know the person well.

If it's only a fiver, then she can add yours can't she.

You say stingy, but for me that would be two days food missing from my weekly budget... times that by every staff member thats a lot of hungry tummy moments...

When I left the last big workplace I was in there was a debate about going to a system where anyone who wanted to be included in things like sympathy or congratulations cars and small gifts would have the option of making one donation per year to an organiser who would sort it all. No idea what happened to that.

And as I said, it wouldn't include birthdays, because the person with the birthday always bought a cake that was shared with immediate colleagues at morning tea break - I never worked anywhere where that wasn't the way birthdays were done.

My place of work seems to always have collections, most people put a tenner in and I have in the past, I do a fiver only now. still adds up though, I've got two I need to contribute to in the next week.

You are right to be annoyed by this.

I no longer contribute anything to collections or sign cards.

We have a ridiculous staff turnover and I am not close at all to my (two-faced) colleagues so I am not going to waste my time and money on this...

I opt out of anything like this at work, including secret Santa because I can't think of anything worse than receiving some crap I don't really want and giving my money up for some crap someone else doesn't really want. I don't even tell them when my birthday is, let alone expect anything for it.

Funnily enough we had this chat today at work. No one should be forced to put in to a collection. I hate when other people try and spend my money for me.

There's a cost of living crisis - stop putting pressure on people to give for anything they don’t want to.

Today at work we were pressured for a bake sale in relation to a charity….but I’m on a diet and we’ve been asked for a lot for the charity. Leave people alone!!!!

That's cheeky! Will add up fast if your firm do this for every birthday. I would've said no too. I don't mind if someone's unwell, or if someone's leaving, even then I don't always contribute

I think that's awful to be asked to contribute.I always contribute what I can afford but I see that some people giving at least £10 or £20 and if I did that then I would have no money left.
We have things to contribute to at least once every 3 months and over 15 years that adds up.
Too many people leave it my place as it's awful , but I cope because it is part time.

I lnow everyone will think im a party pooper but i think work collections are silly

I used to work somewhere that did this but it was very selective. They wrote everyone's name on the wall and then crossed it off if you'd paid. There was always a collection but not everyone got one! I never had one in ten years. But also, what's the point? They only ever got vouchers, nothing meaningful.