I want to preface this with violence is never the first answer and there was better ways of dealing with it.
I got a call from ds (13) school to say that he had been in trouble because he punched a boy in the face and knocked him to the ground, ds is autistic and wears a hat as a comfort item, he’s worn a hat every day for three years and is extremely protective of his hats, no one touches them not even me and his dad. The last time he got into trouble for violence was nearly two years ago when a kid took his hat and wouldn’t give it back. My ds is also gender confused at the moment, and has been since he was 7! (Still Goes by he/him) most people see a quiet gentle effeminate boy and think he will be a pushover but he’s not.
basically the kid took his hat and denied it, ds got in his face and asked for it back and he threw it into the mud at which point ds pushed him towards it and said “pick it up” (all on cctv with audio) the kid said no and pushed back, there was a scuffle and next thing the kid is on his arse on the floor holding his face and ds just calmly picked up his hat and walked off.
school were surprisingly understanding and said he wouldn’t try it on with ds again! Ds is getting isolated at break times for a day but won’t be suspended.
obviously I’ve spoken to ds about how there’s better ways to deal with things than resorting to violence but part of me wants to give him a high five! He’s always been a target for bullies for obvious reasons but I’m quite old and from the generation that understood that if you didn’t knock a bully on their arse and humble them they’d never stop. Hopefully this kid was suitably humiliated by getting his arse handed to him by a boy in a pink hat in front of the whole school and will learn a lesson from it.