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To think I've done what I can about ds3's trousers

39 replies

elliejjtiny · 21/10/2024 12:57

Ds3 is 13 and according to the charts the last time he was weighed and measured, perfectly average weight for his height. He is 5ft 1in and I'm not sure what he weighs. He is quite slim though. He has adhd and autism.

Anyway, ds3 is ok for most clothes except for trousers. He needs age 10-11 for round the waist and age 12-13 for the length. School trousers are ok because he can wear a belt. He likes to wear jogging bottoms at home. He wears a mixture of different sizes, including slim fit but none of them fit perfectly, they are either too big round the waist or too short. I tried taking them in but ds said it made the trousers feel weird. So I've left it as it is. Ds3 is happy and comfortable.

Mil came round yesterday and sighed at ds3's trousers, which were admittedly more like cropped trousers but he was wearing long socks with them so he was warm enough and he was comfortable. I explained to Mil that ds3 is fine, that there are no trousers that are for children that are longer in the leg and smaller in the waist except maybe if he wore leggings but he wasn't impressed by that idea, understandably. Mil said that I was obviously incapable and told ds3 not to worry, that she would buy him some trousers that fit. Ds3 said he was fine with the trousers he had but now MIL thinks he is suffering in silence out of loyalty to his incompetent mother. And that was as well as her usual moaning about how dh is lazy because I put the bins out and how I'm lazy because dh cooked the dinner. And yes we have reduced contact but unfortunately we still see them sometimes.

OP posts:
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AuldSpookySewers · 29/10/2024 13:27

elliejjtiny · 21/10/2024 20:00

I never thought about girls joggers, thanks. Will try h and m too. His school trousers are fine, we buy the ones with adjustable waists but it's the joggers we struggle with. I probably haven't done a very good job of taking them in when I tried, I just added 2 pleats in the waistband at the back.

Ah, that explains why they didn’t fit him comfortably.

You’d never put pleats into the back of trousers, you need darts.
However, stretchy joggers would be easy enough to re-cut and sew, if you know the basics.

If this is likely to be an ongoing issue, are there any sewing classes locally you could join where you can learn how to alter ready to wear clothing? Otherwise, find out how much a professional dressmaker charges?

Favouritefruits · 21/10/2024 20:02

Try Lindex, they have adjustable waist trousers both my boys love them and my youngest won’t wear anything else.

elliejjtiny · 21/10/2024 20:00

I never thought about girls joggers, thanks. Will try h and m too. His school trousers are fine, we buy the ones with adjustable waists but it's the joggers we struggle with. I probably haven't done a very good job of taking them in when I tried, I just added 2 pleats in the waistband at the back.

OP posts:
BlueMum16 · 21/10/2024 15:56

sparkellie · 21/10/2024 13:06

Next do trousers that are adjustable waist, which have been a life saver for me as I have the same problem with my son. I've nevwr managed to get jogging bottoms that fit though, as the draw strings just don't go tight enough. It's gotten worse over the last year because adult sizes don't seem to come with adjustable waists.

We also only bought Next for adjustable waist. You can get slim fit too.

CleftChin · 21/10/2024 15:54

Oh leave her to it - if she can find some and pay for them then there's no loser here.

When my DS was skinny, girls joggers were good - they're often slimmer in the leg (or they were.. maybe not now), or just combing the shops (asian brands like uniqlo maybe) until you find the brand that fits. My youngest wears Zara for instance, because they just fit him better than any other joggers we've tried.

Yellowbananasarebetterthangreen · 21/10/2024 15:49

@Potentiallyplausible if they look a wee bit cropped, ie too short....... thats a target for kids to pick on. Sounds ridiculously trivial but kids can be mean.

Shoesshoes87 · 21/10/2024 15:01

have the same problem with my nephew and these were surprisingly waaaaay slimmer fit than we realised!

direct.asda.com/george/kids/joggers/plain-joggers-3-pack/GEM1060697,default,pd.html?cgid=D25M1G1C20

KarmenPQZ · 21/10/2024 14:50

Yup I had this problem as a child myself and now my kids have it too. Putting darts in the waist does make them feel weird but after a few wears and washes they soften up / you get used to it.

currently busy putting darts in new 8-9 years primark leggings for my 10 year old daughter but they’re already borderline too short so she’s clearly the waist of a 7 year old but the height of an 11 which is not true according to NHS growth charts. Sizing is just way off.

if she finds a better solution please let me know!!!

Redruns · 21/10/2024 14:24

If she wants to spend time and money getting him trousers, let her have a go. You never know she might find a better solution, or maybe not, but at least she'll know.

Motomum23 · 21/10/2024 14:05

How about some WAHM trousers made to specs. I make my kids clothing (out of choice) - soft elastic waistbands and as long as I need for them... ds is the same - age 10 for length and age 6 for waistband

Brassybean · 21/10/2024 14:03

Hi OP - my son always had a tiny waist and long legs - we always found Next , H and M and M and S good for extra length sizes . M and S do Extra long school trousers which still have an adjustable waist . As your son gets older Hollister are very good to be able to chose sizes by waist and length. You do really need to source everything online though

Ellerby83 · 21/10/2024 14:02

I'm surprised you are having so much trouble with trouser length if he is average weight for his height. My ds was 13 a couple of months ago and at 5' 7" seems average height for his school year. He is skinnier than average but basic Primark trackie bots fit him fine

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:02

M&S sell kids school trousers in extra long length which I buy for my teen DS. They also have adjustable elastic waistbands.

When you said ‘you took them in’ and your son said they felt weird, do you know how to alter clothing properly? If you don’t have experience in sewing and fitting garments, you might not have done the alterations correctly? For instance, it’s not simply a matter of taking in the side seams.

I have an Apple shape body with a flat arse so have been making my own trousers for years as ready to wear don’t fit me very well at all. The crotch length is usually wrong for starters so I make my self a pattern block and use this to alter anything and re-do it if my weight changes.

A professional dressmaker should be able to alter the trousers to fit properly so it might be worth exploring this option?

Maray1967 · 21/10/2024 13:58

And yes, your Mil is rude.

Maray1967 · 21/10/2024 13:57

I’m used to this - two DSs who are very slim. You need adjustable waist jeans from Next. They pull in quite a lot. School trousers were M & S - again, adjustable waist.

PaperRemote · 21/10/2024 13:56

"That would be great if you would find such trousers."

She won't. Then you can enjoy the failure in peace.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/10/2024 13:51

Your MIL should butt out! It’s not like she has to wear said trousers.

Borninabarn32 · 21/10/2024 13:46

Have you tried buying from the girls section? They're usually slimmer fit.

But YANBU she's been a dick to judge and speak to you like that.

Fridgetapas · 21/10/2024 13:41

Try European brands they often are more narrow and long. My slim and tall DS basically only has Zara jeans/joggers as they are the only things that stay up!

Bubblybits · 21/10/2024 13:39

Your MIL sounds like a knob, but there are definitely options out there, as a mum to a long string bean.

These Lindex joggers have invisible buttons on the inside to adjust the waist. H&M and Polarn have the same thing.

TumbledTussocks · 21/10/2024 13:38

Right well her attitude is horrid but just le ther crack on.

Either she'll solve the problem or, if not, hopefully return with a tad more empathy that she started with.

Maybe she will find something and your son can wear trousers that fit him.

Potentiallyplausible · 21/10/2024 13:37

Yellowbananasarebetterthangreen · 21/10/2024 13:12

If your MIL is convinced she can find what your son needs Id say "great, thankyou so much. What a help" and let her get on with it.
My concern is that if your ds trouser legs are too short he will be picked on at school. Its hard enough being a 13yo school kid, even harder with autism and adhd. Kids are unkind. Maybe try seeking out advice from a local seamstress? See what they can suggest?

Why would he be picked on? His school trousers are fine.

SJM1988 · 21/10/2024 13:33

Smileatthesmallthings · 21/10/2024 13:31

We've found H&M skinny joggers best for my skinny 7yo fyi

oo thanks. I don't usually go to H&M so not tried theirs.

Smileatthesmallthings · 21/10/2024 13:31

SJM1988 · 21/10/2024 13:15

This the sort of comment my mum and MILL make about my DS (he's only 7 though). We have the same issue. School trousers are fine as you can get adjustable waists. But he loves joggers. I have to buy down a size or two then they are half way up his calf. Can't win either way.

I'd just tell her ok. Let her waste her money trying everything you have already done

We've found H&M skinny joggers best for my skinny 7yo fyi

LoveSandbanks · 21/10/2024 13:28

Your mil is a cow but next will
gave what you need. I had 2 like this, the youngest is now 16 and still has 25” waist
at 5ft 11. He loves joggers and is at college so now I make them for him.