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AIBU?

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Original poster

Please help ,child neglect

33 replies

ivise · 20/10/2024 17:41

Emotionally unavailable parents often display emotional distance, unpredictability, and self-centeredness.. This can lead to feelings of neglect and rejection. Emotionally unavailable parents often display emotional distance, unpredictability, and self-centeredness. Common signs include . This can lead to feelings of neglect and rejection.

This was copy however this made me cry because I think I am emotionally unstable for my daughter. I barely survive every day and she deserves so much more but I can not imagine my life without her . What can I do . I am scared to reach out for help because I am scared they will take her from me , don't get me wrong she is fed , clean, looked after ,just I feel I am not all there emotionally for her,because I am struggling my own demons and sometimes I just want to be left alone . Her presence can frustrate me at those times .

Pls help me

OP posts:
Original poster
ivise · 20/10/2024 17:58

@towardstheocean am I crazy ? Because I feel like I am there all day in bed on my phone surely I am so bad ?
This is how I am programmed to feel ? Obv it's not all the time but often . After work if I pick her up I just want my own space ,I do t ignore her but I don't want any emotional attachment, I will cuddle her but not play if that makes sense . Hard to explain

OP posts:
CameronStrike · 20/10/2024 17:58

towardstheocean · 20/10/2024 17:55

Yeah, that’s not child neglect.

It can be.

OP what help are you getting for your mental health? There is nothing you've said that suggests social services would even get involved so don't let fear keep you from seeking help. You've recognised the problem, now you need to do something about it.

Donkeyfromshrek · 20/10/2024 17:56

They are not going to take her off you because of what you describe. It sounds like you could use some support though, so if you can, go ahead and ask for it. GP or health visitor could be a good place to start. The feelings you describe sound very normal, I think most people wish their small children would leave them alone at times. It does sound like you are struggling more than most though.

Also make sure you do get some time out for yourself. Can you go and do whatever it is that makes you feel better, and ask your partner to take over at times so you get regular breaks?

towardstheocean · 20/10/2024 17:55

Yeah, that’s not child neglect.

Original poster
ivise · 20/10/2024 17:50

@towardstheocean I don't think I neglected her in ways of giving food and all that stuff but more like emotionally I am not there at all. If my partner is there or if I am so down I be just lying on sofa ,I feel so guilty

OP posts:
towardstheocean · 20/10/2024 17:47

Obviously I don’t know what you’re doing or not doing but child neglect is a pretty serious thing and doesn’t generally mean not meeting emotional needs. It sounds like you’ve read one of those guilt inducing instragam posts and got upset.

Original poster
ivise · 20/10/2024 17:46

@JovLane she is 4 ,turning 5 in July . I feel like I am not good at all, there is times I just want her to leave me alone but not in a hated way ,my emotional brain can just not take it

OP posts:
JovLane · 20/10/2024 17:45

You are meeting many of your daughter’s basic needs, well done. You are also recognising where it would be ‘better if’.

How old is your daughter?