School harassing us over attendance...

The school are right to keep an eye on it, sure, but to be so fascist and relentless and heartless about it is damaging the child and is a safeguarding issue in itself.

We have similar. Dd, 6 has been ill since the start of July-Pans/pandas-severe psychological symptoms. She’s been off school for 22 days in total, the school are relentless, organising meetings to see how we can work together to get her back in school. We have letters are Drs & psychiatrist letters confirming her illness, we just need a bit of time to get better, I want Dd back to school and back to normal too but she’s clearly not well yet, so much added pressure at an already difficult time

This does sound like the school being over the top - a none-too-bright safeguarding officer blindly following "guidance" without using any common sense. But wouldn't it be helpful they contacted the GP, as GP should have been able to confirm child was genuinely ill? (provided they asked your permission?).
I hope the solicitor you consulted is able to clarify the position so that whatever records they have are clear that this should not count against you.

I really feel for you. Schools can be terrible about attendance. My son and daughter attend different schools. A couple of years ago my dad dropped dead suddenly whilst abroad. My mum has a terminal illness and uses a wheelchair. My dad was her carer. I'm an only child and both parents only children.
I had to go to the country to sort everything out and care for my mum, eventually bringing her back to the u. There was property involved and this took 6 weeks.
I don't drive and they were located in the middle of nowhere. So my DH had to come as he drives. So we went across as a family.
His work were amazing. My work were amazing. My daughters school were amazing.
My sons school reported us to the LEA and I had attendance warning letters despite me having told them every step of the way what was going on.
I had to meet with the LEA officer whilst having all this stuff going on, moving my dying mother cross countries etc
And they had the audacity to say to me 'how can we make sure things improve and this doesn't happen again?'
I don't fucking know mate? Can you guarantee none of my close family members suddenly drop dead?
My son had perfect attendance up until this point abd he's had it since. They knew what it was about.. they still chose to make my life so much harder by harassing me.

School attendance is off the scale now when children are genuinely ill.
Back a few years ago when the fines were first introduced and attendance was seen as priority even when children were ill I had a terrible experience.
Our healthy daughter suddenly collapsed and was diagnosed with a life threatening heart condition that none of us had any idea she was suffering.
Our daughter was transferred to a specialist heart unit over 100 miles away for heart surgery.I kid you not but as they were wheeling our daughter to theatre for heart surgery,my mobile phone went off and it was her school banging on about the importance of attendance and wanting to know when she would be back.I was struggling to hold it together and I told the school's attendance officer to f off and went on a rant.I knew my daughter had no English teacher for months due to her teacher being off for months sick and and endless supply of supply teachers.In my anger I told the attendance officer to drag her English teacher back to work as obviously sickness isn't allowed regardless I'd it's life threatening.Ive no advice just sympathy for how the system is regarding long term illness for school children.Its worse now than it was then.I think it gets to the point your so angry you don't care who the school report to.I now work in a school and it's no wonder illness spreads like wildfire due to the hygiene issues.For example 2 young children messed themselves this week ,spread it on class walls and floors and it was left there all day until the night time cleaners come in.
So no wonder germs and illnesses spread like wildfire in schools.

I still think it's ott and warrants a complaint, to Head, possibly Board of Governors.

Ignore the letters, they are computer generated based on attendance percentages and her percentage is low at this point because she’s had time off early in the school year. The school has to send them though they’re just box ticking their procedures.

You know you’ve done nothing wrong so just go with the flow of their calls, “yes she’s still got chickenpox, no I don’t know when she’ll be better, thanks so much for your concern, bye”. They do have a way of phasing things that insinuate you are untrustworthy - it’s awful but the best way to deal is to grey rock them.

"well done on the school for potentially saving a child’s life" 😂sure, it was all down to the attendance officer for saving this child's life, not the doctors at the hospital that cared for her 🙄

Pretty sure this mum and her GP have got the child's medical situation in hand, if anything, the school have put her health at risk. Didn't you read about her hearing loss due to the school forcing her back AGAINST doctor's orders?

There's in between options though, aren't there. It's not a choice between doing absolutely nothing for 4 months and asking a parent to send a child with chicken pox or tonsillitis to school every single day.

Good luck OP. Thank you for raising awareness of this increasing problem in schools. I feel for you, we are ten years on you but this is awful to be treated like this at a vulnerable time in your lives.

Ridiculous and completely unnecessary. They may have targets they have to achieve, and obviously a safeguarding role to check where children are if they are absent, but that approach is batshit. Coming to your house is unacceptable unless they have genuine safeguarding concerns. My children are at two primaries and neither is anywhere near as strict as that.

I find overzealous attendance targeting completely unacceptable - children, and adults for that matter, are ‘allowed’ to be unwell and recover from their illness. Nothing good, physical or mental, comes from denying time off school for this.

Edited. Forgiving soul?

It's got to this point because you've allowed them to carry on like this. I've heard of other people being harassed when their kids are in hospital. But I said why on earth would you answer the phone to them in that situation. Just blank the life out of them and say you don't answer to withheld numbers. Kids have times in early years where they seem to be always ill. You've kept them updated and they've taken it too far. It's like a form of bullying from them. As I said you've allowed the schools behaviour to get to this instead of setting firm boundaries.

NHS guidance is to wait until the spots have become scabs usually 5 days not “until the scabs have healed” . That would take much longer . Was this partly why she was off for so long ?

Chickenpox significantly weaken some people's immune system for a long time, so yes bad chickenpox have a bigger than average chance to be followed by another bad illness soon.

Calling every day while the child is hospitalised isn't making anyone safer, so yes, it can be seen as harassment.

Your logic is worth some vomiting emojis in my opinion.

I think it’s likely you don’t think you have kids in school right now

eh? What does that mean.

Yup. And last year, she was four and in Reception.

@Righteouspuppy I think it’s likely you don’t have kids in school right now. Social problems exist but if a parent is clear in their communication then in most cases, trust needs to be involved, as in the case in point here. The child you mention was known to social services and is unconnected to this.

My dgc got comments after genuine illness., she was 3 and legally not school age. Think it is getting beyond ridiculous

from who? She wasn’t at school!

My dgc got comments after genuine illness., she was 3 and legally not school age. Think it is getting beyond ridiculous

Wow, this is nothing but harrassment, i've heard so many stories like this lately. It was bad enough when my children were in school, but it's really ramped up the last few years. Makes me see exactly why my daughter is going to homeschool my granddaughter as she has cerebral palsy and other brain issues.

Sometimes, kids/parents have really really bad luck in terms of illness and when it’s relentless like this it’s bloody hard. If you’re a parent who’s had fairly healthy kids then well done you.
I had 2 of my children during lockdown, which meant they weren’t exposed to anything for the first year and then bam, every illness under the sun! OP isn’t talking about any rare diseases here, tonsillitis can be AWFUL, hence why it sometimes requires an operation. Chicken Pox is horrible, ear issues are horrible.
it must be very stressful for you OP. Maybe you could set up a meeting with the school?

Not really... Most children never get hospitalised in their whole childhood but those who do are likely to be several times due to underlying conditions.
Chickenpox lowers the immune system for several weeks so getting something else bad straight after is entirely normal.
It's not just random chance that determines whether a child gets badly affected with common viruses.
And it's definitely harrassment to phone daily when a child is in hospital and to ask that they return to school even though still unwell, repeatedly visit the home etc.

I remember many years ago now, when I was in year 4, I had a really bad case of chicken pox, I had also previously had tonsillitis and had been pretty unwell with it (I get it chronically) not too long prior to the pox.
I remember the school sending my parents threatening letters about my attendance and checking up on us via phone and email ( but not in person thankfully) for the entire duration of the illness.
It is awful. They should NOT do this. I understand visiting for long term absence if no doctors note or professional communications as to why they are off. However when it is clear and evident said child/children are unwell, and evidence presented they are visiting the GP, or the hospital there is absolutely no excuse!
It's awful and I really sympathise with you OP, but it's certainly not a new thing sadly.

We have been to 2 different GPs over the last week and they both mentioned school

did you ask them why? If I understand the GP is asking you why she’s not at school?