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Friend catfishing neighbour on Insta - tell him?

137 replies

TwinklyBlueEagle · 18/10/2024 14:26

My friend made a fake account for laughs on Instagram last year using photos of a model from Brazil and she has started using the account to catfish one of our neighbours because she thinks it’s funny. She has made it look very genuine and if I didn’t know it was fake I’d think it was a real account.

I personally think it’s really naughty to deceive someone I know into forming a relationship with a fake woman. I jokily told her she should stop but she didn’t think I meant it. The whole thing doesn’t sit right with me though but if I tell him she’ll think I’m a right backstabber.

OP posts:
Gazelda · 18/10/2024 21:25

@Summertimer I think you should have the good grace to acknowledge that your first post has evidently been interpreted as victim blaming by a number of people, and that maybe you could have worded it better if that wasn't what you meant to say.

Instead, you are arguing with several,posters who all had the same interpretation of your words as I did.

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 21:16

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 21:04

so, when you said you would hope he had had the sense to block those type of accounts, what did you mean? Because it reads s if you ar blaming him for not recognising the fake and blocking it.

Also, my words are not those used here in your reply

TofuTart · 18/10/2024 21:15

Arlanymor · 18/10/2024 14:36

It’s not naughty, it’s downright cruel to toy with someone else’s emotions. She needs to stop this before someone gets hurt. Tell her that if she doesn’t stop it then you will let the neighbour know.

This. It's not " naughty", it's nasty.
She's a bully.

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 21:14

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 21:04

so, when you said you would hope he had had the sense to block those type of accounts, what did you mean? Because it reads s if you ar blaming him for not recognising the fake and blocking it.

It doesn’t read like that. It means one would hope that the person subjected to this nasty scammer would be able to see through their horrid fakery. Where the blame bit?? There isn’t one

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 21:11

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 21:04

Yes I have. Obviously.

They were absolutely right.

No they were not. Victim blaming is not present in anything I said, quite obviously

NachoChip · 18/10/2024 21:05

OP, I really mean this kindly but I worry that you are lacking in self esteem that you even had to ask this question and are possibly scared or intimidated by your friend.
What she's doing is downright nasty, manipulative and cruel. She knows it but she thinks it's hilarious to humiliate someone.
I know there are a lot of LTB type reactions on Mumsnet but honestly this woman is clearly capable of some nasty shit and could turn on you. I would be wary and start keeping my distance.
And definitely please end this one way or another, whether that's anonymously or reporting on Insta (you don't want to be her next target in fairness).

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 21:04

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 15:58

Have you read what the person said? Disgusting assertion. A awful thing to falsely accuse me of.

Yes I have. Obviously.

They were absolutely right.

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 21:04

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 20:23

For the last time - the concept of blame does not feature in my reply

so, when you said you would hope he had had the sense to block those type of accounts, what did you mean? Because it reads s if you ar blaming him for not recognising the fake and blocking it.

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 20:23

ScottBakula · 18/10/2024 19:17

What ?
Why do people fall for been told they are nice / good looking / attractive/ intelligent/ .
Let me see now 🤔
Possible want to go on a date.
Even more so with this poor guy as he probably knows that this horid woman knows his neighbour so there is a built in level of trust.
Don't blame the guy when it's the ops friend that been a cow

For the last time - the concept of blame does not feature in my reply

Wordsmithery · 18/10/2024 19:18

Truly nasty of your friend and could be devastating for your neighbour when they find out.
Do the right thing. Tell your friend to stop, and tell your neighbour. Otherwise you're complicit, which makes you as nasty as your friend.

ScottBakula · 18/10/2024 19:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

What ?
Why do people fall for been told they are nice / good looking / attractive/ intelligent/ .
Let me see now 🤔
Possible want to go on a date.
Even more so with this poor guy as he probably knows that this horid woman knows his neighbour so there is a built in level of trust.
Don't blame the guy when it's the ops friend that been a cow

gamerchick · 18/10/2024 16:05

I wouldn't tell him for now. I'd be telling her that you're reporting the account and if you catch a sniff of her doing this bullying again you would be telling her victim and every person she knows.

You need better friends

Attelina · 18/10/2024 16:03

What a horrible thing to do.

The man she's cat fishing may be telling her private and personal details such as he feels lonely or down about things.

It's not a prank, it's not a joke, it's not funny, it's downright cruel and nasty.

Has this man wronged her in any way?

I would expose her.

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 16:02

DanceTheDevilBackIntoHisHole · 18/10/2024 15:59

It wasn't false.

Most definitely was. No victim blaming of any kind.

thepariscrimefiles · 18/10/2024 16:01

She is a horrible person. Why would you want to be friends with her? What has the neighbour done to her to justify this?

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 16:00

Iwantamarshmallowman · 18/10/2024 15:31

but you were victim blaming.

In no way shape or form. There is no remote possibility.

viques · 18/10/2024 15:59

TwinklyBlueEagle · 18/10/2024 14:26

My friend made a fake account for laughs on Instagram last year using photos of a model from Brazil and she has started using the account to catfish one of our neighbours because she thinks it’s funny. She has made it look very genuine and if I didn’t know it was fake I’d think it was a real account.

I personally think it’s really naughty to deceive someone I know into forming a relationship with a fake woman. I jokily told her she should stop but she didn’t think I meant it. The whole thing doesn’t sit right with me though but if I tell him she’ll think I’m a right backstabber.

It’s not “naughty”, it’s nasty, bullying behaviour and you are condoning it by not telling the poor sod she is lying to. Which in my book is as bad as being the one lying and mocking him. Do you laugh when she shows you the posts, or say nothing or do you tell her to stop. if it is either of the first two then ask yourself what this says about you.

DanceTheDevilBackIntoHisHole · 18/10/2024 15:59

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 15:58

Have you read what the person said? Disgusting assertion. A awful thing to falsely accuse me of.

It wasn't false.

Summertimer · 18/10/2024 15:58

SoupDragon · 18/10/2024 15:06

Reported for what?? 😂😂

Have you read what the person said? Disgusting assertion. A awful thing to falsely accuse me of.

BobbyBiscuits · 18/10/2024 15:56

She must be either very immature or a sociopath to want to torment some poor innocent bloke into thinking he's got an online lover. She could easily start extorting money off him, would that be funny? It's bang out of order.
I think you should tell her it's really gone too far now. She could get in bad trouble and if she doesn't stop you'll consider telling him.
She needs to close the catfish account. Tell her so in no uncertain terms.

OrwellianTimes · 18/10/2024 15:53

That’s sick and disgusting behaviour. Tell her to stop it, and drop her as a friend. How can you call someone who is so cruel a friend?

ImNoSuperman · 18/10/2024 15:52

Report the Instagram account for impersonating the model with details of the actual model.

Get better friends.

KimberleyClark · 18/10/2024 15:51

She might want to listen to this. I assume Janessa Brazil is the name she’s using. This poor woman’s images are the most used in the world for catfishing. She’s a real person and is suffering as a result.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/w3ct4ppj

Love, Janessa - 6. Love, Vanessa - BBC Sounds

Her real name is Vanessa. Her model name is Janessa Brazil. Vanessa tells her story

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/w3ct4ppj

Candaceowens · 18/10/2024 15:50

Naughty? Are you joking? It's sick and twisted. I would tell him and I wouldn't remain friends with anyone who did this.

WhereYouLeftIt · 18/10/2024 15:47

TwinklyBlueEagle · 18/10/2024 14:26

My friend made a fake account for laughs on Instagram last year using photos of a model from Brazil and she has started using the account to catfish one of our neighbours because she thinks it’s funny. She has made it look very genuine and if I didn’t know it was fake I’d think it was a real account.

I personally think it’s really naughty to deceive someone I know into forming a relationship with a fake woman. I jokily told her she should stop but she didn’t think I meant it. The whole thing doesn’t sit right with me though but if I tell him she’ll think I’m a right backstabber.

It is not "naughty" - you are using that word to minimise what she is actually doing, which is abusing the neighbour.

Your 'friend' is an arsehole. Why would you care that an arsehole thought you were "a right backstabber" - unless you are also an arsehole?