To feel shaken by Liam Paynes death and wonder how we keep our kids safe

Don't do more drugs than you can handle.

Oh ffs what is wrong with people... Every time some poor sod dies, people somehow find a way to make it all about them and start lighting candles and holding their children tighter. Bloody grief thiefs.

This thread is really in bad taste.

Thank you.

Yes, part of my professional role involves safeguarding. I was horrified by the GP’s lack of evaluating records, tracking prescriptions and monitoring actions when compared with education.

The verdict was misadventure.

As a teacher, I would say we need to redress the balance . Less social media, and trying to focus children's attention off themselves. I am fully behind more awareness of mental health but in some cases it is making children more inward looking and the escalation between normal feelings of "I'm feeling a bit nervous/sad/fed up and "I don't want to be here anymore" is so quick

Its akin to sending them up chimneys quite frankly

The entertainment industry is exactly that, an industry with the making-of money at the heart of it. Every decade has its tragedies, the list is long, Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, Judy Garland, Brian Jones, Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, Whitney Houston are just a few names that spring to mind. The industry chews them up and spits them out, many use substances to cope with the punishing schedules, the touring and the general unreality of life in the rarified atmosphere of fame and adulation. To many on the outside it looks as if they are living the dream, but there really is dark side to fame and for most people I am sure it is very hard to cope with. What we have today of course is the 24 hour scrutiny and the appalling piles on via social media where all and sundry can say the most vicious and vile things.

@Demonhunter good post, I think George M saw himself in Amy, in his Desert Island Discs, he predicted she might not make it.

@NoaVic that's tragic and I'm sorry. I've lost both a father and a brother to suicide so I recognise the pain.

However, thrusting a young boy into that world at 14 with unlimited money, unlimited access to drugs, the constant need for fame, the shallow idiots that surround you add another layer of dysfunction altogether.

In educational institutions we are constantly graded and inspected on our safeguarding processes but yet 14 year olds can enter this festering pit of vipers and no inspections or questions are asked at all! It's madness!

In 40/50 years time society will be horrified at how we have exposed our children to social media.

Yeah she seemed to be someone who enjoyed working with her talent but hated the fame that came with it. George Michael was like that after the initial few years of Wham and lots of the talented actors would rather go without the fame, they just enjoy their craft, not the celebrity it comes with.

100%. Social media is toxic.

I was surprised to hear Matt Cardle had struggled, MH issues aside he was older & grounded. If fame affects those like him negatively goodness knows how the very young fare.

If Geri had left Spice Girls in social media days too etc…Everyone has a breaking point.

As a parent this type of thing scares me a lot. Both of my children have been involved in the performing arts, one hs been mentally scarred by the dance world already, the other is starting to be successful in music but thankfully not in the fame way, he is forging a career as an MD/session musician/keyboard player.

I read the post this morning from his bandmate which mentioned perfect pitch. That immediately set alarm bells ringing and I now discover he had ADHD and potentially autism. Sadly those with these two conditions are far more likely to find thigs hard. Self medication with drugs or alcohol is common and they have an addictive personality and mental health struggles as I have seen in my own children.

I feel so much for his parents and his little boy. It's incredibly sad.

Most children won’t grow up to be a member of one of the most successful boybands in the world so your post doesn’t really make sense

I highly doubt she meant that, people that want that sort of life, have that sort of life.

There are plenty of pop stars/musicians/actors that you dont see falling out of cars and clubs and splashed all over headlines all the time. Some people need the validation of it all and that is the source. If she wasnt famous she may well have had the sort of life tht many posters write about on here of people they go NC with because they cant cope with the drama of.

Im not sure though why people seem to be misinterpreting the OP, I dont think she is making anything about her, she is seems simply thinking about how we protect young people from seeking out and having dysfunctional outcomes in their lives, not necessarily about it being from fame and fortune or on the telly or something like that

Thank you.

The outcome seemed inevitable.

We have to be strong in not blaming ourselves. Adults make their own choices. The adults around him also make their choices.

No one can predict how anyone's life is going to turn out. There's so many variables, so many split decisions that can change the course of your life no matter how old you are.

Thank you. We try our best!

Amy Winehouse said if she could give it all back to have a normal life she would have. Take note fame hungry people.

Exactly this. It is never the fault of the supportive family who turn themselves inside out to help the addict.

Wow, this is a new low in making someone else's tragedy all about you.

dont encourage your 14 year old to go on tv to be a singer

Keep your children away from the music industry and Hollywood, both are full of paedophilies that prey on young stars.

Have you seen that video of 14 year old Justin Bieber having a sleepover at P Diddy's house? With P Diddy licking his foul lips and salivating over that child like a bit of meat? No wonder he is so troubled now.

We'll never know what happened to Liam Payne to make him so unstable. But I dont doubt that from his mid teens onwards he would have been exposed to groomers and abusers. It's well known drugs are often used to cope with the shame and horror from being SA.

Keep communication open
Tell them you love them often
Share experiences/feelings/ available support