Would this put you off someone?

Are you just looking for issues? This is the problem with txting this could be tongue in cheek, it could be serious. I’m pretty positive 2 is harder but then I’d reply something back along the lines of - ha you would think, but all depends on the babies and the parent 😜
You either like him and want to give it a go or you don’t. You haven’t met up yet and you are seeing issues. Be honest you are both adults with children. Hey tbh I’d rather do x until we see how things go. Dont want to jump right back in.

having witnessed a friend who has twins dealing with them both getting d&v at the same time, vaccinations at the same time, teething at the same time... he's right? it's relentless enough with one, I can't begin to imagine what dealing with 2 that little would be like with no backup.

I mean, regardless of whether he's a genuine and nice person or not, which none of us can know, the fact is he's already annoying you, OP. You have no real ties or obligations to this person, he's already irritating you and getting your back up: just cut your losses here.

This.

The relationship in whatever form you're envisaging hasn't even (re) started and he's being massively off-putting in his messages - it's not going to get better, just swerve.

As another poster says the babies only being eight months old and him already having not only split up with their mother but gone out of his way to initiate contact with ex girlfriend (s) doesn't bode particularly well either.

Thanks but no thanks I think.

You've had some good text exchanges, however he has now committed a faux pas - but it's not iredeemable. You've had some good insight here and you're now going in with your eyes open. Why not have that drink and see if he puts in the requisite effort and follows dating decorum? Just don't be serving desert just yet.

I thought that too! Why on earth would anyone willingly choose to get involved in that situation is mind boggling

He has 8 months twins, has split up from the mother already and is looking for sex.

Are you asking for madness op? Why oh why would you want to date someone who has 8mo twins??
Wide massive swerve.

Oh yes even if you don’t know the bloke and have met them online, they will be angling to come to your place aka a shag as soon as possible.

I'd say he's properly looking for sex with as little effort as possible. But even if I'm wrong and he does want to date you would you really want to get involved with a guy who's got 8 month old twins.. sounds messy.

It's his 8 month old twins that would put me off. Parents of young ones need help. I wouldn't want to provide that.

He wants to get his leg over, preferably by making as little effort as possible, however he will go through the motions of taking you out on a date if he must. But he has an expectation of sex 😉 at yours.

If you're really lucky OP, you'll be his mum and his twin babies monther too (interesting timing for him to be getting back in touch now he has twins to look after for half the week!) .

Come on OP. You know where this road goes..

She said they're with the mum half the week.

He's looking for a new mum for his babies.

Why are they not with their mum, btw??

Run like the wind.

I love men, but I'm not naive. And to your (slightly tedious) 'but what if it was a woman' scenario, if a mum with 8mo twins was angling for hook-ups, I'd be both astonished and impressed at her energy, but would still not encourage it with an ex like the one OP describes.

If it was a woman with 8 month old twins most mumsnetters would advise her to not to rush round to an exes house and to go out on a proper date, if I was advising I'd say not to date anyone if your babies were 8 months old,

Chances are this bloke is after childcare and a quick shag. If hes split up with someone with 8 month old babies somthing went seriously wrong. I'd put my money on him being dumped as most women dont want to raise small babies on their own, nevermind twins

I left my ex when my son was 8 months old and it wasnt a light decision.

I think it's moving a bit quickly. I'd be slightly suspicious of his motives. Suddenly now that he's a single dad to tiny twin babies, he wants a new potential girlfriend? Hmm...

😂

And no one on here knows the reason why he is single with 8 month old twins. So if this was a Mum who was single with 8 month old twins and said to a guy or I could just come to yours and watch a movie if you prefer, your opinion would be the same? Oh actually don't bother answering, just remembered how much MNers hate men.

This. Also, never go backwards. He’s an ex for a reason. Your OP states he turned a bit sour when you broke up. Why put yourself through that again?

If you can't judge a guy whose single with 8mo twins and sniffing around, who can you judge?? And no, that wouldn't apply if he was widowed although no doubt a widower would be even less likely to be sniffing around an ex so soon.

If you think he sounds kind and considerate and only looking out of the OP's best interests, your judgement may need recalibrating.

He is just after a shag

People are so judgemental on this thread! Immediately he must just want a shag and childcare, why? Can't someone just be kind and considerate that he's offered a couple of solutions just in case going out wasn't the right one?

We are both now single parents. He has a set of twin babies who are 8 months old who he has for half the week and I have a 3 year old. He got back in touch a few weeks ago saying it would be good to have a catch up

Convenient timing isn't it?
He now has twin babies to care for half the week.
Suddenly he wants to catch up with you again, wink wink etc.
Please don't be naive, he's looking for a stepmum for his kids. In no time at all he'll be trying to move in with you and your child so you can look after all of them during the half of the week he has them.

That would put me off much more than the coming round to yours with a takeaway.

Don't even go there. It didn't work when there were no children involved so it sure as hell isn't going to work now.