To begrudge her perfect little life

You've come across as really bitchy because you ARE really bitchy. Please end this friendship for this poor womans sake, she deserves better friends than you.

Yea I once had a "friend" say the following to me

"Oh it's easy for you, waltzed through school and university with good grades, then waltzed into a great job"

Yea none of that took hundreds of hours of hard work and dedication!

People see what they want to see.

How is being jealous of her going to improve your life in anyway?

Nobody knows what's really going on in somebody's life. You or the friend could wake up tomorrow and everything changes.

miss workaholic
Ugh, you're nasty and bitter because she worked harder, is more successful and is probably a nicer person? I hope she stops being friends with you, she will catch the stench of jealousy from you pretty soon I'd say.

Weird when people come on to go against other posters but end up giving the same advice as everyone else.

She isn't just checking the validity, she's bitter and in her replies, hasn't addressed the suggestions given, but instead keeps talking the friend down.

She wants people to agree but many have said to look inward.

Thanking people for their comments and asking for further advice on where to start working on herself would be the thing to do.

It's not up to you to begrudge her anything - her life is nothing to do with you. 🫣

I have a ‘friend’ like you. Thinks everyone else is really lucky and they are really hard done by. She will definitely already know that you don’t like her. Don’t worry!

Why don’t you get a voodoo doll? For this lovely sounding person that has never done anything to you.

I think you’d be better exiting the friendship as she really doesn’t need friends like you.

Everyone has their good seasons and sad seasons, and we can’t compare, and jealousy and envy are really pointless and unhelpful - to yourself as well as to your friendship.
I have a friend who on the face of it has a seemingly “perfect life”. She has everything I would dream of, she is so happy with her life and generally things are going so well for her, she never seems to have problems. However, I have known her long enough to remember when she did have some really tough times, she had some very upsetting things happen in her childhood and she hasn’t always had it easy. So when I do get those pangs of jealousy, I just remember that she deserves everything she has, because she has her share of difficulties in the past, so why shouldn’t she live a great life now, and it makes me all the more happy for her.

Comparison is the thief of joy. Envy is not a good look.

You'll be inconsolable if her kids grow up to be smarter, more successful and more attractive than yours.

Do both of you a favour and cut ties with her now.

This. She hasn't been left millions by some old aunt or won the lottery, nor is she some famous musician touring the world with thousands of adoring fans.

She has worked hard to get a good job and now has a partner who loves her and kids, with some awful relationship experiences in the past. That pretty much describes most of my friendship circle. There is nothing here that is particularly out of the ordinary or spectacular to be jealous of. Its hardly "perfect" or "too good" and I agree this is a very bizarre post.

It also doesnt make any sense why you'd be jealous of swan towels and all that stuff if you personally think they are cringe.

Such a weird post.

I agree that comparison is the thief of joy, and appearances can be decieving. Your friend's life may look perfect but im sure she doesn't share the negative stuff.
I used to feel envious of a couple who had it all - genuinely the loveliest people, interesting, well paid careers with lots of travel, always wearing the nicest clothes, or lived in a tastefully decorated home in a well to do area, and made it all look effortless. Fast forward a few years and they moved out of London nearer our home town (though the wife still commutes) and I've bumped into the husband a few times at the swimming pool with my kids. Life has changed with the arrival of kids, sounds like their marriage isn't the happiest (as he keeps mentioning their problems) and both are quite stressed. But their Instagram feeds tell a different story.
Your friend sounds lovely and im sure you wouldnt want her life to do a 180.
I wish my friends were as happy with their lot as they appeared to be several years ago, but also that I didn't give it so much headspace at the time.

Reading back I have come across really bitchy.

Yes, yes you have.

Your "friend" worked really hard throughout school and work, has escaped an abusive relationship and now has what appears to be a great life.

You not friends.

Friends are happy for one another, support one another, and don't get competitive.

Your original post and now this is one of the strangest things I’ve ever read. Why would you think her life is ‘nearly too good’? It sounds lovely yes, but the vast majority of people I know have followed a fairly similar path. I am surprised you feel like this woman has something remarkable - what are the lives of the other people you know like?

Most of the people in my life have followed a fairly similar path - worked hard at school, got a good job, got married and had kids (if that’s their thing!). It’s a really lovely for them but I would hardly say it was a ‘perfect’ life or ‘nearly too good’. It’s the norm for the vast majority of people isn’t it?

We can ALL have swan towels!

Don’t think I’ve ever read anything so bitter on here and that’s saying something. This girl has worked hard, escaped an abusive relationship to find a decent one and you’re so overcome with jealousy and bitterness you’ve felt the need to write about it. I’m guessing you’re secretly hoping it’ll all fall apart for ‘Miss workaholic’ and she’ll be as miserable as you so you can feel better. Honestly. So grim. So so grim. So mean. Astounding.

You sound like you’re willing something to go wrong for her so you can console yourself with the fact her life is somehow fake or unachievable. That’s really sad.

Honestly, I’d step away from her and focus on what you can do to increase your own happiness.

I hope this doesn’t come across funny.

I think that your post is a reflection on yourself rather than your friend. Comparing your life / being jealous of a friend is just a waste of time.

There is always going to be someone out there that might be prettier, smarter or richer than you. Likewise, there will be people out there who aren’t as educated, poorer and less fortunate.

You also never know really what someone is going through behind closed doors. Someone might seem to have the perfect life, only to divorce their husband or have problems later down the line.

It doesn’t sound like you’re showing your jealousy to her, but all I can say is a jealous friend I try and distance myself with me.

Oh believe me her friend knows. I had a super envious friend once, and she would keep dropping snide comments " oh well, it's so easy for you." She's now my ex-friend.

Honestly, OP, what struck me was how ordinary and unenviable her life is to cause such deep envy! She’s nice-looking, works, has a house, children and a husband who went home early from a night out rather than getting a lap dance or something.

I mean, I could understand your level of envy if she’d managed incredible success in a career you’d tried your best at but not succeeded in getting onto the bottom rung, or if you were single and desperately wanted a relationship (with or without swan towel proposal), but her life sounds perfectly pleasant but ordinary. You’re presumably still quite young — if you’re not happy in your career, or it doesn’t pay enough, look into retraining. If your relationship isn’t making you happy, end it. You have a lot of control over some things!

Your jealous of a friend because she’s happy?

I have a friend who had her kids much younger than I did so hers are grown. She has freedom, space, a happy life with her husband, and a fancy job that gives her amazing opportunities. Honestly, the only thing I feel towards her is pride and love. I’m so happy she’s happy.

You need to look inward. It sounds like something in your life isn’t where you would want it to be. Perhaps start looking there.

OP is being given a hard time here, not once has she ever shown her friend these feelings and she is using an anonymous internet forum to check the validity of them. She isn't an "awful friend" as some of you are saying.

It's human nature to compare ourselves to others. When people are doing way better than us it's hard not to feel left behind. This is a problem as old as time itself. The Bible is full of stories of inferiority complexes and jealousy. I very much doubt any of the posters in this thread who claim to feel nothing but happiness and joy for everyone around them. That's just not how human brains are wired up and it feels incredibly fake.

I totally get it OP. It sucks that humans are fallible and in an ideal world her success shouldn't bother you, but we are all flawed and nobody is perfect.

You have two choices now, either work on those feelings and try to find peace with her success, or decide not to be friends anymore.

My first though too 😀