Need a hand hold

Sorry forgot to add xx

Hi RaspberryBeretxx.
Ive added picture of the perfume so you know it’s the right one. You won’t be disappointed.
The staff really are lovely and I’ve surprised even myself today because I have just spent over an hour chatting to one of the other residents about anything and everything (the one whom I said if I wish anybody could get better t would be him) , I told him how lovely his family is and we even managed to laugh a few times. He’s welcomed me to join him to watch telly so I’m stepping right outside my comfort zone and going to watch some tv . Wish me luck 🍀 xx

Hi RaspberryBeretxx.
Yes I have written on here before , before I was made homeless and struggling with everything.
I only came across MN when I was in hospital and since then it’s become my lifeline and I’ve made contact with so many lovely , wonderful people .

When I was speaking to one of the councillors last night she made a comment to me . She said ‘this is why I moved into this profession, to help people like you because it’s makes everything worthwhile’ how lovely is that .

I know my daughter has just had her first payslip , she’s only part time as she goes to college but she thinks she’s rich now lol 😂. The tips are all shared out between the staff but she still got £140 in tips on top of her wages which is brilliant.

I already have a few bits for when I get a house only small things like a blue wooden handmade crate for cleaning supplies and some smellies and a handmade light in a glass which is lovely. Oh and I’ve also got a wooden spoon ! It’s lovely actually (for a spoon). When I did my first Ocado order last week I got 15% off, free delivery and a free gift so I chose the spoon for when I get a house .
If anybody looks in my suitcase in my room I’m sure they will wonder why there’s a random wooden spoon in there lol 😂

You really need to try the Shay & Blue black tulip , I got is as a free sample at M&S once and I’ve never received as many compliments or have so many people asking me what perfume I was wearing . It lasts all day Aswell xx

Hi ChoccieCornflake.

Awww you are so lovely , thank you very much!

Are you ok? I hope your afternoon goes better than your morning .
Did you have anything else to eat last night or did you stick to the biscuits?
Im just having a cup of tea enjoying the views outside .
I spoke to my daughter earlier , she’s going to a Halloween party as a policewoman! I said what’s scary about that? 😂 xx

Hi Ruralretreating.
I hope you are having a good day?
I managed a few hours but was up most of night still . Hopefully with new medication I will be able to get some sleep tonight .
I’m just sat at the kitchen table having a cup of tea looking at the trees outside xx

Oh TealPoet….
What an absolutely lovely poem!
I’ve just read it to one of the councillors and she wants to write it down and laminate it and put it on the wall in the living room.

So just know that the poem you lovingly sent me is going to be read by so many other people that come and go here whom are in a crisis. How amazing is that!
And strangely I was speaking about this to my mental health nurse when she called me earlier about ‘thoughts’ she said I’m bound to feel bad right now , anybody would but just remember the bad thoughts are just that , ‘thoughts’ .
I said I feel like I’m wading through mud right now and she said you have to keep going and go right through the sticky mud to get to the other side .
I managed to get a little sleep just a few hours but didn’t drop off until 4am . I’ve been prescribed some sleeping medication a different one to before so hopefully they will work , I’m just working out how I can pick them up as the pharmacy doesn’t deliver and the staff said they can’t leave here so looking at seeing if Uber can fetch it for me xx

Thank you Ruralretreating.
Im writing my list as we speak , I’ve got a warm glow inside of me re-reading them. It’s only a tiny glow but it’s there and that’s because of all your lovely words .
I know re the football mums they never contacted me when I found out I had cancer so I don’t know why I’m so upset by it .
I love that piece of advice , I’ll use that in future.
There’s a Facebook page called ‘mysterious minds’ it’s basically a charity that supports families of suicides . Anyway I read a post on there that said ‘don’t let somebody tie your shoelaces when they haven’t been in your shoes’ . I quite liked that.
Hope you have a lovely sleep, sweet dreams xx

Thank you Apolloneuro.
And thank you for the advice I really appreciate it.
I know it’s so annoying and frustrating when people say ‘fight it’ . I understand they was probably anxious and I get that but the lecture my dad gave me when I was laying paralysed in a hospital bed I mean talk about kicking somebody when there down . But i shouldn’t speak so negatively of them because at times they have been good to me and I do love them. I’m upset with them especially right now for not being there when I need them but it’s not all them it’s me too . Since the hospital incident I have pushed them away so I’m to blame for that although on the other hand if my daughter rang and told me what I’d told my mum I would drop everything and be by her side.
Awwww your going to have a wonderful weekend with your granddaughter, I hope you have lots of fun and make lots of memories xx

I don’t think you get enough credit TealPoet.
You sound like an amazing human being!
I read an article once about things or tasks that you hate doing or put off doing instead of calling it ‘things to do’ call it a ‘wish list’ because when you look at it , it makes it seem less of a chore and it’s stuck ever since and it does work .
I will try my hardest tomorrow to push myself to go into the craft room so I can tell you about it .
Have you any plans for the weekend?
My youngest has a football game tomorrow and we used to get score updates via a watts app group chat and whilst I was in hospital this year and wasn’t able to be there I could cheer him on behind screen but yesterday I was blocked from the group chat (football mums now hate me) but I’ll wait until youngest tells me about it after game xx

Thank you ChoccieCornflake.
It’s all you amazing people that are lovely and kind.
People I’ve never met are complimenting me and being so kind and encouraging and giving me strength I didn’t think I had .
Whatever happens in my life going forward I will never forget the kindness of all of you on here xx

Ruralretreating…
What you have wrote just there has made me cry but no sad tears just that somebody sees me like you and all the other lovely posts I get .
Im so used to negative things being said to me so for people to be so kind about me and my personality touches my heart .
Thank you for seeing something in me that I forgot was there xx