AIBU to expect 4 cats to stay in utility room/study?

You've been told repeatedly it's not normal.

The cats if they exist are stressed and miserable.

Yeah one shit per week will be enough to drive you over the edge once baby arrives. 4 cats is A LOT of cats for one house. If reducing to 2 is out of the question, and if you have the outside space, you can set up houses for them outside too, and you may find they spend most of their time there. We trained ours to toilet outside by having litter tray inside house for several weeks, then outside right beside the cat flap, then moved tray further away, then got rid of tray altogether and now go "in the wild". So much more hygienic. Ours were kittens though, so still malleable of mind. 4 litter trays will create quite the stench, and I think cats are happier sleeping where the air is not reeking of their waste. Even training them to go in a litter tray just outside house would make a big difference to the smell inside your house.

Cats are clean animals. They will do their utmost to keep clean. 5 cat litter trays minimum is required for 4 cats. 1 each plus extra. Also, good size and depth ie. not tiny. More regular cleaning out and praise them when they use them. The cats are not happy which is why they are toileting about the home. They will be picking up your negativity towards them and any tension. Do they have any stimulation? Toys, cat trees, scratching posts? Nice beds to chill & sleep in? Really if you could put aside not being a cat person and befriend them you would be awarded with amazing friendship from them. If you do rehome them please never ever entertain the idea of ever getting a cat or dog in the future. It is not kind to the animal. I really feel sorry for the poor unloved cats in your home.

How often you need to replace all the litter depends to a large extent on the type of litter you are using.

We use clumping fibre cat litter and can easily go a month without replacing all the litter. With other types of litter it can be just a couple of days, it varies.

However it absolutely needs scooping every day - one of our cats will tell us loudly he isn't happy with the state of the litter bin if it isn't cleaned to his liking.

It does sound like the pet urine smell has built up so your cats now see most of the house as an appropriate litter tray. You (actually your DH) will need to go round every single place cleaning with pet odour spray.

If they regularly wee just over the side of the litter tray, this is a classic sign of pain and stress related urinary issues.

Cat poo and wee in every room, sorry but your house must stink. Do visitors ever mention the smell? Definitely not the right sort of environment for a new baby.
Feel sorry for your cats too, contrary to what some people think, cats are solitary creatures and don't like sharing their home with other cats. This may well be the root of your problem. Reducing their space will stress them even more. The kindest and safest thing would be to rehome all but one of the cats. Also, now they've all marked the whole house with their smell, it'll be an uphill battle to get them to stop if you do keep them all.

Of course they were rehomed!
and they were outdoor cats anyway- I just couldn’t bear them in the house at all - they made me feel physically sick just looking at them.

Anyway in case you hadn’t noticed the actual problem under discussion here is that OP is pregnant, and sharing a home with four cats that pee and poo everywhere and a lazy husband who doesn’t care. 🙄

He’s not cleaning the trays regularly though, you don’t seem to be grasping this. 4 cats, 3 litter trays and you said he only cleaned them every 3 days initially.

They're constantly pooing and weeing all over the house, including in the bath. So constantly is now once a week? Which is it? You said The mess is disgusting and I'm at my wit's end

I wouldn’t be bringing a baby home to that environment.

@notaurewhatusername if your DH insists he is keeping the trays clean enough, what is his explanation for why they are toileting in the house and how does he plan to solve it? Because he can’t say it’s normal for
cats, and surely he can’t say that he has no issue being in a house where there are regularly animal faeces lying around (even if once a week, it is a recurrent theme not just an accident). So what is he planning to do to help the cats and you?

For the love of God LTB before your baby is born.
He has no respect for you. You deserve better. You are worth so much more than the cats!

Cats pooing and weeing around the house is a stress indicator. As others have mentioned, corralling them into one space in the house will only increase their stress.

The other issue is once they’ve toileted somewhere the smell remains and they tend to go back to that place.

I have two indoor cats and out of nowhere one started toileting around the house. I took him to the vet and we all drove ourselves mad trying to work out what he could be upset about. It was because I’d changed the type of litter in the tray! Bit of a nightmare as the factory had flooded so it was unavailable for months. But as soon as we changed it back he was fine again. In the meantime my teenagers had learned to put their clothes away and not leave them in piles on the floor - every cloud etc!

Start with the litter trays. Clean them out, disinfect them. Keep them very clean and scoop poo straight away. If you’ve changed litter go back to the old one! Maybe get an extra litter tray and see if that helps. If they’ve toileted on any soft furnishings, carpets or clothing use one of those pet sanitiser products to remove the smell. Personally I wouldn’t be too bothered about the occasional weeing in the bath, just make sure you clean it before use.

Your DH needs to step up a bit and maybe you need to calm down. Your first post sounds like there is cat poo all over your house, now it seems like there’s a problem but nowhere near as bad as you first suggested.

You need to rehome the cats. No cat I have ever known poos in its own house.

In that case, I'd definitely move out! You're having a child and having 4 cats pooing and weeing all over your house is incompatible with that.

“Don’t be so stupid”? Wow. You’ve chosen a real prince amongst men. Does he usually talk to you like that? No wonder you’ve got no confidence to stand up to him.

I agree, or she moves out, I wouldn’t bring a baby home to a house smelling of animal faeces or urine, the smell would be in everything.

Edited to add if they can’t meet the needs of the animal it’s kinder to rehome them.

Ewww. Nothing could give me the ick more than a man who puts his dogs above his wife and kids (and I love our dogs). @TwinklyAmberOrca You know that's not normal, right?

@notaurewhatusername
What would happen if you told your DH you refuse to bring a baby home to this house until he sorts the situation? Poor you and poor kitties.

He will not listen and just thinks he is right all the time.

This relationship has no future.

You need to make plans to leave.

Litter trays should be cleaned numerous times a day. Poor cats. You are not fit to have them if you can't even keep the trays clean

You’re very passive in all of this, OP. “DP says this…” “DP says that..” “He’s very stubborn..”

It doesn’t matter what he says. Or how stubborn he is. There is clearly an issue because you’ve got cat piss and shit all over your house! Whatever he is doing isn’t working. He needs to man up and resolve the problem, not leave it to you to ask the internet.

If I were you, I’d be giving him an ultimatum. Either the cats are re-homed or you’re leaving.

As an aside, he clearly doesn’t give a flying fuck about you or the baby. No loving man, excited to be a new father, would act like this.

Cats are very clean animals. They don’t go to the toilet outside their boxes unless there’s a reason. And they don’t need “training” to use them. I think it’s only right to try and get to the bottom of this before rehoming them.

When the baby arrives, make sure you empty the contents of a nappy or two into his wardrobe. Then ask him if he thinks it's an issue. But I don't think you should stay in this house. I think he needs to choose, you or the cats.

It's not normal or desirable to live in a house that is used as a litter box by four miserable animals. Does he think he's normal?

Does he think anyone will ever want to buy the house when it has been used as a pissoir by four cats?
The answer to this is a resounding no, BTW.

Your H sounds like one of those people who end up as hoarders. Facilitating multiple litters of kittens, wilfully disregarding civilized norms of domestic life, putting the comfort of his family last and his obsessive behaviour first, denial and gaslighting - none of that is good. It all points to psychological abnormality.

If I were you, I'd be making plans to leave.