Wedding photos

Your brother is at fault here. We eloped, but with a set of friends each who came with children. We had a professional photographer and I made a request for one photo to have our friends and us sans the children as they have a no social media rule.

I also had a professional photographer at my daughter’s christening and when I sent an email with the link I said please don’t post to social media any with the children’s faces in them please.

Easy to accommodate very reasonable parent’s wishes to not have photos of their children on SM. I honestly think people are extremely naive about who and what can be done with even the most innocent of images (especially with the addition of AI)

She sounds absolutely awful.
Her children shouldn't have been in those photos if that is how she feels.
How dare she dictate such a thing.
Your poor brother and wife.

Oh and I don't have any SM and have never posted a single photo of my children on line.

But she allowed the taking of the photos in the first place.

The photographer can use them on their social media and there's nothing she can do.

I'd be peeved if I was your brother

I literally have only ever met one person in real life that doesn't post their kids photos online and they are by all accounts 'eccentrics'. Its certainly not the 'standard' or 'default' position.

When I worked in photography many, many people actively paid me money to photographer their kids and post them online. There a literal multi-million pound industry based around it.

Well my thoughts are your sister is a dick. I feel sorry for your brother. Is your sister married herself? Is there any resentment there meaning that she wants to sabotage his happiness? I am betting she wouldn’t dare do this if it was one of her friends (and said friend would probably laugh at her anyway).

There you go. Quick example. Might work to obscure the kids. Took me 3 minutes with free Internet bits and bobs.

Note please...this is an AI image. This boy does not exist.

Her family know her views though, so yes her brother posting her children's photos probably did come as a surprise.

Given most people post their wedding pictures online now, and have done for about twenty years, it can’t come as a surprise.

It was her brother's wedding, and he knows her views on social media. Perfectly reasonable for her DC to be included in family photos. As others have said, wedding photos are for frames and albums.

I think people who vehemently don’t want their pictures to be shared, shouldn’t stand in front of a camera.

OP I’d get your brother to blur their faces as it’s more subtle than emojis, and repost the photo.

Go to the AI image generator on Bing. Create images of children in wedding guest dresses/suits. There should be an image editor somewhere out there that will let you cut them out of the background and turn the fake kids into stickers. Pop them over sisters kids. Do the same for sister while you are at it because it wouldn't surprise me if that were to be her next "issue".

Unlike many on here, I'm not seeing her as some innocent lovely mummy trying to protect her little ones from the hordes of online perverts out there apparently pulling on their dingaling to group wedding photos 🙄.

Also, how high is the resolution on the photos exactly. If a random pervert can cut out a usable image of them kids out of a line up of 200 people, I would be very surprised. Not many photographers out there publishing super high resolution for no extra cash.

She is a drama llama intent on stirring the shit is my guess. If she's so fantastically diligent about images of her children getting out, she would not have intentionally steered them in to the centre of a shed load of brothers photos. I do wonder if super safe mum of the year there has previous with the groom, doesn't like the bride or just likes to make everything about her in general.

So many people appear to be ignoring this bit "she actively got her children in multiple photos on the day".

I have never understood people who freak about their kids pictures being online - your sister sounds very neurotic and attention seeking.

Cool, so 200 emails need to be sent to get people’s consent to post a happy group picture from your wedding? That’s totally normal and reasonable.

Absolutely her prerogative if she doesn’t want her children’s photos on social media. He could easily have blanked out their faces when sharing the photographs. Wedding photos aren’t predominantly for social media; they’re for posterity. They go in albums and in frames. So completely rational that she wouldn’t remove her children from a big family group photo just because she didn’t want her kids on social media.

It’s very easy to put stickers over their faces. If this had always been her stance and she’s consistent about it I don’t know why everyone is surprised just because it’s a wedding.

Thankfully even in futuristic 2024, the people I know IRL know better than to share photos of other people's children online without permission.

@KrisAkabusi of course it is, once a photo is public on Facebook you forfeit control of what happens to it or where else it gets shared.

Personally I'd be fine with family wedding photos being shared (but share very few photos of my kids myself) but I don't think the sister's stance is unreasonable at all here. It's a bit strict but that's her call as a parent.

Covering their faces with emojis is a perfectly sensible way of handling it, and if your brother knows her position on photos he should've done it first.

And of course she wanted her kids in the group photo. Photos aren't just for social media, they're for posterity.

Completely agree with the sister. I also would be furious and hate the thought of my kids photos online.

My family would respect this and blur the faces or stick an emoji over them

Oh yeah because nobody ever puts their wedding pictures on social media. Because it’s 1994 of course, not 2024.

I think it's really weird that you think two small faces with 198 others in one photograph is 'plastering photos over the internet'.

I think it's really weird that your brother would rather plaster photos of his own nieces and nephews over the internet than use the emojis to block their faces out, which is a perfectly normal practice.

I expect your sister imagined the photos would end up on the wall, not on social media.

In a group of 200?
Don't put them the picture in the first place.

She should have done a group photo with her children, then moved them out of the shot so that they could get one that they could share if they wanted.

But she also needs to realise that she doesn't actually own the photos and it's not up to her where they go. So she shouldn't have had them be in any if she was concerned about this.

I don't post pictures of my children online, but wouldn't be bothered by a group picture of a couple of hundred wedding guests.