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To be fuming that other mum is asking my son why he has extra time?

169 replies

Folicky · 16/10/2024 07:31

Son is due to sit transfer test in a few weeks. We went to familiarisation session recently at the school where he is due to sit the exam. My son is getting extra time. The children with extra time had to sit in a different part of the assembly hall away from the other children in their class. Another melter of a mum who I normally dodge on the school run, and who is maniacally competitive, asked my child (out of earshot of me) why he was getting extra time, also said to the facilitators that he shouldn't be in the extra time group, waited for us outside and then rang me afterwards (I missed the call). Fact of the matter is, (a) it's due a mixture of mental health and a few neurodevelopmental issues; and, (b) it's none of her business. Nonetheless, I'm worried she's going to try to do this all over again to my son outside the school. I only collect him once per week, so can't fully protect him. What response would be appropriate?

OP posts:
CabraCadabra · 16/10/2024 08:23

She's got more front than Blackpool that one!

Stormyweatheroutthere · 16/10/2024 08:22

Why has she got your number for starters?

Frowningprovidence · 16/10/2024 08:21

I just wouldn't engage. At most tell your son to say mind your own business or this is upsetting me, I'm going to tell a teacher.

If she really did speak to the facilitator(how do you know this) I can't imagine that went down well with the school in question.

ThatAgileGoldMoose · 16/10/2024 08:21

Answer the phone to her (or ring her back) and ask her why she felt it was appropriate to ask your son why he got extra time. Tell her that it is for private medical reasons and that she must cease and decist poking her nose into your son's business as it is private and not information that she is entitled to.

But I do prefer the option of telling her to fuck off

TeenToTwenties · 16/10/2024 08:14

'Because I need it'
'Because I qualify for it'

Pottedpalm · 16/10/2024 08:11

He should say ‘Dunno. Ask mum’

GoldenPheasant · 16/10/2024 08:08

Unexpecteddrivinginstructor · 16/10/2024 07:37

Practice with your son something like 'That is my confidential medical information and of no concern of yours. Did you mean to be so rude?'

I would mention it to the school too.

Don't do this with your son. At most he needs to say "Ask my mother".

Merryoldgoat · 16/10/2024 07:41

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This about covers it.

leia24 · 16/10/2024 07:40

Unexpecteddrivinginstructor · 16/10/2024 07:37

Practice with your son something like 'That is my confidential medical information and of no concern of yours. Did you mean to be so rude?'

I would mention it to the school too.

🥹😅 please don't teach your child the weird MN special of 'did you mean to be so rude'

She sounds like a weirdo just say your kid has ET approved and can she please stop trying to find out why

AlertCat · 16/10/2024 07:40

Massive overstep of boundaries and the school should be told. Good suggestions here of what to message her and what to practice with your son, but the school really ought to reinforce that with a message about respecting others’ private information, not all differences are visible, mind your own business etc.

FireMyLogs · 16/10/2024 07:40

Definitely tell school she asked him this question and talked to the facilitators to tell them he shouldn't be in the group.

Tell your son that his stock response to a parent asking him anything is ask my Mum and message the Mum to tell her she is out of order and I am sure she wouldn't want another parent asking her child questions. That is also how I would phrase it, turn it back on her.

Jabtastic · 16/10/2024 07:39

The transfer is so stressful it turns lots of people into melters- both children and parents alike! Don't engage with her.

Unexpecteddrivinginstructor · 16/10/2024 07:37

Practice with your son something like 'That is my confidential medical information and of no concern of yours. Did you mean to be so rude?'

I would mention it to the school too.

Lookslikemeemaw · 16/10/2024 07:36

Meaaage her, tell her it’s private information, not to talk to your son and tell the school

whatatodoaboutnothing · 16/10/2024 07:35

Make the school aware and agree with pp send her a message telling her your son will not be disclosing his medical history to her
what a weirdo

Womblewife · 16/10/2024 07:35

HipHipWhoRay · 16/10/2024 07:33

Just message her proactively and say something like ‘I understand you were asking my son to disclose private medical information, please stop.”

This- totally this.

Moonshiners · 16/10/2024 07:34

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This. How rude.

HipHipWhoRay · 16/10/2024 07:33

Just message her proactively and say something like ‘I understand you were asking my son to disclose private medical information, please stop.”

blueluce85 · 16/10/2024 07:32

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