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Original poster

To lie about completing a fundraising challenge

62 replies

Journeyintomelody · 16/10/2024 04:46

This is just something I've found mildly infuriating...AIBU?

Friend is doing 4 different charity fundraising events at the same time. One of them is running X number of km in a month. Every day she posts updates on her progress. As the month has gone on its clear she is just adding Kms to top up her runs (eg. Run 5km but add 8km to the tally).
I know people social media is often a big lie but this has really grated on me, I think because it's been done so blatantly.

Things like "pressed the stop button by accident 2km in, but here's another 8km crossed off", 12km added over night but the longest distance she has ever claimed to have run is 9km. Etc.

Just venting really. I hate dishonesty. If you want to run then run. If you want to raise money for charity then great do that. Noone is going to ask for a refund because you didn't complete the challenge - especially if they can see you out in the effort. But please don't lie and use it to tell everyone how wonderful you are.

OP posts:
Bellatrixpure · 20/10/2024 09:36

What is the charity? Honestly I wouldn’t care how far she’s ran, she’s obviously putting the effort in.

Jiski · 20/10/2024 09:32

How do you know she’s lying? My husband always forgets to turn his on for walks and runs.

tomaitistomas029 · 16/10/2024 08:05

You're definitely not being unreasonable to feel frustrated by this—it can be really annoying when someone is bending the truth, especially when it comes to something as well-intentioned as a charity challenge. It’s like they’re missing the point of the effort and the honesty behind it. Most people would respect that she’s putting in effort for a good cause, even if she didn’t hit every kilometer exactly.

wiesowarum · 16/10/2024 08:04

Journeyintomelody · 16/10/2024 07:52

It doesn't matter at all. I think she is just cheating herself. Id rather choose the charity I want to donate to.

I also think some of the following up messages are distasteful

"So far I've raised £xx, help me reach my target 🎯 "

No, you haven't raised or done anything yet. That money has come from the generosity of others.

As an alternative...
"thank you everyone for your generous donations, together we have raised £££s"

Show quote history

I agree OP.
I hate the 'I have raised....', and always said something like 'thanks to generous donations we've raised.....'.

Holotropic · 16/10/2024 07:57

Journeyintomelody · 16/10/2024 07:52

It doesn't matter at all. I think she is just cheating herself. Id rather choose the charity I want to donate to.

I also think some of the following up messages are distasteful

"So far I've raised £xx, help me reach my target 🎯 "

No, you haven't raised or done anything yet. That money has come from the generosity of others.

As an alternative...
"thank you everyone for your generous donations, together we have raised £££s"

Show quote history

So don’t donate. You can’t control what she does, or how she counts her totals, but you can certainly tell her why you won’t be doing it again. No one is forcing you to donate to this rather than a charity of your choice.

Original poster
Journeyintomelody · 16/10/2024 07:52

Lemonadeand · 16/10/2024 06:34

It’s annoying, but at the end of the day the money is going to charity. So I think, if you can afford to give £50 to cancer research or whatever and you want to, does it matter how many miles your friend ran?

It doesn't matter at all. I think she is just cheating herself. Id rather choose the charity I want to donate to.

I also think some of the following up messages are distasteful

"So far I've raised £xx, help me reach my target 🎯 "

No, you haven't raised or done anything yet. That money has come from the generosity of others.

As an alternative...
"thank you everyone for your generous donations, together we have raised £££s"

OP posts:
Lemonadeand · 16/10/2024 06:34

It’s annoying, but at the end of the day the money is going to charity. So I think, if you can afford to give £50 to cancer research or whatever and you want to, does it matter how many miles your friend ran?

wiesowarum · 16/10/2024 06:30

Having completed a sponsored swim, and counting every single length, there's absolutely no way I would have lied about my totals!
All the money raised went to the charities in question too, no cut for a nice holiday. It's shameful to lie imho but then some folk lie all the time.

DoIWantTo · 16/10/2024 06:17

I don’t donate to fundraisers anymore for this reason, especially avoid the million and one Facebook donation requests too.

Original poster
Journeyintomelody · 16/10/2024 05:52

@jen337 Agreed, Same person in OP did one of these trips. Distasteful is the word I was looking for!

The dishonesty makes me cringe even more.

OP posts:
Morph22010 · 16/10/2024 05:09

jen337 · 16/10/2024 05:02

Personally I find this style of virtue signalling fundraising distasteful even when done properly. Even that ‘Sir Tom’ walking his garden during lockdown. Even worse those adventure holidays, raise £3k, 2k pays for the trip, 1k for charity, being able to bore all and sundry forever more about the ‘experience’: priceless.

More like £2999 pays for trip £1 to charity, people rarely raise above the minimum required for the trip so there’s hardly ever excess to charity

jen337 · 16/10/2024 05:02

Personally I find this style of virtue signalling fundraising distasteful even when done properly. Even that ‘Sir Tom’ walking his garden during lockdown. Even worse those adventure holidays, raise £3k, 2k pays for the trip, 1k for charity, being able to bore all and sundry forever more about the ‘experience’: priceless.