Bad ending to holiday with friend, AIBU here?

Yes me too.

On the lines of how the fuck else am I supposed to fucking sleep through your fucking snoring which is enough to drive anyone to fucking murder

Is there an en-suite? Can you sleep in the bath? (Beats the hallway)!

I'd have absolutely lost it with him when he woke me up. Stupid twat.

From his point of view though he got woken up by you playing random noise- and asked you to turn it off - you said he wasnt aggressive/shouty - probably normal reaction for being woken up in the middle of the night. He doesn't know that you haven't slept because of his snoring - he doesn't know you are a light sleeper - because you haven't told him - he might not even know he snores!
Have you told him any of this? if you had told him and he ignored it thats one thing but he doesn't know!!

It's this post @ExhaustedAbroad1 that twigged me to question your relationship and suggest ending the friendship. I suspect he's your "safe" guy, but you choose a "type" and he just showed it.

Hallway sounds like a good option tbh.

If he is on his back you could try rolling him onto his side. It might not last long though. Maybe put a pillow behind him so he can't easily roll back.

Record his snoring, and download a decibel meter and use that too.

Then when he claims its not that bad, play it back to him and tell him he needs to get a referral to a sleep clinic as it sounds like has sleep apnea.

Is it too late to get your own room?

Also you never know. Plenty of posts on here about people who have been hurt by someone they completely trusted.

Go with your instincts. Just in case.

Yes! Don’t push down and ignore your perfectly valid gut feelings.

He really shouldn’t have booked a twin room without checking with you first. Some women would be ok sharing a room with a man who isn’t their partner, some wouldn’t.

He sounds inconsiderate and domineering. I don’t think I could be friends with him after this and certainly would never go away with him again.

Don’t let this ruin your friendship. You’ll be back in your own (snore-free) bed tomorrow, which you’ll appreciate so much more. Hopefully, you’ll be able to look back on this together and laugh.

I know you’re feeling fragile, but if the way he spoke to you was out of character, he was probably just ratty because he’d been woken up. If he says anything about it, just tell him the truth, but take the edge off with humour. Something like: “It was the only way I could sleep through your effing snoring, mate. I’ve barely slept a wink the whole break”. Then laugh.

And book another break together. But in a two-bedroom Airbnb, with the living area between the bedrooms. Floor plans are your friend. When away with friends, apartments make it easier to chill together but also have your own space. Sharing a twin hotel room, even with a mate who doesn’t snore, can be a bit much. Especially if you’re a light sleeper.

There's a time and a place for diplomacy and tact and there's a time and a place for murder.

He could have just turned the sound off and left you sleeping. He could have booked separate rooms knowing he snores. He could have let you wake up gently each morning instead of forcing you up with light and noise. How selfish.

If anyone feels awkward in the morning it should be him.

In future make sure you have fuck it money. I would want to just calmly leave and make my way home by myself. Or have my own room in the first place.

You never know someone until you share a room with them on holiday 😅

Record some of it on your phone and play it to him when he gets up

Hmmmm good friend utterly disrespects you in a domineering fashion.
I don't think you are "friends" at least from his perspective and he's a surrogate for you.
I'd end the friendship.

I don't even know what to say to him tbh. He clearly has no insight at all.

'You may not realize this but you snore very loudly and I am a light sleeper. It's ruining my holiday and I really did not appreciate the way you spoke to me when my white noise (that I put on to try and block out your snoring) woke you up.

At least you have had sleep all the other nights, which I unfortunately have not.

Do you have any suggestions how we can sort this out, or should we just decide we are totally incompatible as holiday companions in the future'.

In fairness, he probably has no idea he snores that loudly, and woke with a jolt to loud white noise.

A lot of people who snore badly have no idea, they think it’s a moderate thing while in fact they’re like a faulty chainsaw.

He didn’t have the context of “exhausted, sleep deprived and trying to drown out awful snores”, he had “roommate started playing her phone loudly in the middle of the night.”

It’s a shame your trip hasn’t gone well. It’s rotten that you’re so exhausted. Don’t let it put you off future travel, just insist on separate buildings rooms

Nightmare OP. I think I'd have insisted I catch up on a bit of sleep in the day while he went out due to him keeping me awake.

@ExhaustedAbroad1 You need to be very clear to him when he awaken from his lovely, noisy slumber, that he must never speak to you that way ever again. You don't need to explain, but you can mention how triggering it is for you if you feel generous. You certainly don't owe him an explanation.

Then - autopilot mode for the travel home. Be a grey rock, a robot, go through the motions to get from point A to point B safely. Crawl into bed and sleep for however long you need to when you get home. Look after yourself.

Going forward, if it were me I would not continue the friendship. But you need to make that decision.

Be kind to yourself and I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Perhaps you're just not well matched for vacationing.

You were nervous about flying, you're a light sleeper, you couldn't sleep despite having earplugs, you lacked confidence to verbalize your wants/needs, the excercise/exertion/lack of sleep exhausted you on a very short trip. This is just what you directly identified.

Snoring is annoying but there isn't anything he can do about it...does sound like he wasn't patient on the last night certainly...but only you know if you are fun to travel with. Perhaps don't write the friendship off but do consider if you have the same travel/vacation styles.

Just tell him the least he could do is let you go to sleep first get some ear plugs and over the counter sleep aid tablets. Not sure if you can get them there but kalms one a night are really good.