AITA for wanting to be able to speak to my child’s teacher in the morning?

Noone needs to speak to a teacher first thing. Email the office with the subject heading
Msg for Mrs X re first name surname in Class ABC
Don't slow them down by having to look up who your child is when you've used an email in your maiden name and given their nickname and say which class they're in.
Don't ring so they have to write down what you're saying (ask for all the info you're not giving) and then action it.

And this is why parents are no longer allowed on the playground at my DD's primary. It was taking up too much of the teachers time in a morning, preventing them from greeting the children and actually starting the school day. We have to wait outside the gates now and the children just go in once they are opened and go straight to the classroom with parents under strict instructions that if they wish to speak to a teacher they need to contact the office. Works much better now.

@Onestepfromendingitall It isn't pompous. It actually works very well now. How is a teacher supposed to take her class in while 2 or 3 parents are waiting to talk to her?
The parents drop them off at the gate, tge children play jn the playground then thd teacher takes them in when the bell rings.

You don't just rock up at a doctor's surgery and expect to see the doctor immediately because it's a sensitive issue.

You have to be pushy yourself. “Sorry to interrupt but I’ve got to dash off but Sarah …….. “

or as other said a note to hand in. I’d possibly also mention parents monopolising teachers when the school ask for the tearm / yearly feedback.

Our teachers don’t come out in the morning for exactly this. Only the assistants who will grab a teacher if they feel it’s required.

Every class has at least one mum like this. My DDs class had 2, my DS's class has 3.

I recall one day when I had to quickly tell the teacher that my 5 yr old had received a diagnosis and whilst I'd update her properly by email i needed to flag something immediately . I did manage to get to the door first but was interrupted, so the teacher said she needed to speak with me and asked me to come in and the other mum followed too. The teacher had to be very assertive about it. The mum could nit comprehend that she wasnt the top priority. That mum blocked the door in and out for the next 5 years!

I feel sorry for the children whose way in and out is blocked every day.

Urgh these parents think their child is the only one in the school. I’ve had parents try to grab me for a chat between lessons in a secondary school when I was walking past the school office. And when I said, sorry can’t talk now I have a lesson, they didn’t give up but kept trying to talk. Same parents take up 80-90% of teacher-parent interactions. And not always in the best interests of the child at all.

Our school has an app so you can directly message the teacher, support teachers, headmistress and office but we still have this issue at the gate every morning. Drives me mad, it's always the same parent blocking the gate.

I've taught my DS to run through like an out of control freight train if she's in the way, he's got her in the shin a couple of times with his book bag or water bottle, oddly the teacher never tells him to slow down, be careful or apologize.

Just rush up.. say oh sorry I'm in a rush but just wanted to let you know ...literally interrupt and be rude once and she'll get the message. Smile and say hope you don't mind ..walk off.

'Excuse me, sorry to interrupt but I need to rush off and this will only take a second. Just to let you know ........'

This is probably the only way you'll get a message passed on.

At my DS school it spears to be general chit chat about the child from this specific mum, not handover chat but sort of anecdotes like oh it was so funny when he said / did xyz.

This happens at DS’ private school too. But as the other child has additional needs there’s obviously a lot for them to discuss. I find emailing my son’s teacher for an appointment works - the TA then either takes over the handover the other parent or our apppoinment starts a bit later. Ultimately it’s on you to vocalise your needs.

Same with mine - not allowed through gate in the mornings and in the afternoon it was the TA/admin persons job to hand the child back to the parent. Never saw the teacher. Parents invited into school for special assemblies but very controlled.

Does the parent and teacher have an arrangement to hand the child over at the start and end of the day? This is a very common arrangement for kids with Additional needs and something the other parents will not be aware of.

We have one at my child's school. My child can never get through the door. Another person doesn't stand in the door but still in the way, I said excuse me, three times, louder each time and got ignored. Extreme levels of patience are required. Don't get me started on parking on yellow zig zags nearly running kids over who are entering the gates.

The school my DD used to go to didn't allow parents into the grounds for this reason. Even the new reception starters (apart from the first day) the parents were not allowed through the main gate.

Can you go a bit earlier when you need to tell the teacher something and get to the teacher before her?

Omg there is a mum at my eldests school who does this! She is literally just chatting about random stuff that her kid did that morning / previous evening. Constantly talks about him too. She's nice enough but only talks about her child and always wants to talk to the teachers.

This happens in my DD's school as well. The school also sends out messages saying "please raise any queries or concerns directly with your child's teacher in the morning or at collection at the end of the day to reduce the number of emails and calls to reception"

It's incredibly frustrating and means a lot of the time you just don't bother...which is probably what they hope happens.

We had this, the hogger ignores the directive from the school and strolls on in, everyone else of course abides by it in fury.

If the child has additional needs it's quite likely mum does too, and hogging the teachers time everyday sounds like someone that doesn't understand social etiquette.

If I'd been you I'd have nipped around to Reception and left a message at the front desk which would have been passed on.

Teachers want to get children in and settled not a full blown conversation with parents

That's ridiculous! So that one parent has made life that little bit more tricky for everyone else, especially school staff. Sometimes every parent needs to see the teacher in person, especially if it's a sensitive subject that the child doesn't want broadcasting round the school office and gossiped about by the staff!
How pompous

I would politely interrupt in this situation. The teacher won't mind and would probably be glad of it. It sends a signal to the other parent that she's not the only one who needs to speak to teacher.

We had a parent like this and in the end had to politely but firmly tell her that she had to stop doing it. None of our parents are allowed anywhere near the teachers now so if they have something important to tell them, they email or phone the school.

YANBU. I always found it difficult to get the teacher's attention the odd time as the same parents were always taking up their time.