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Original poster

What do you spend child maintenance on?

40 replies

kungfullama · 15/10/2024 09:26

My ex and I have a reasonable arrangement for maintenance payments for our dc. Never been through CSA/CMA.

His monthly payments go into a separate account to my current account and for a long time I just left it alone, hoping to let it save up for when ds gets older and there are big costs likes cars and university if he wants to go.

I always managed to cover the day to day costs by myself. Utilities, food etc. But as he's getting older he's eating a lot more and generally costing a lot more with socialising and activities. Now I find myself dipping into the maintenance savings a lot more. If he needs anything in particular - shoes, winter clothing, school transport I tend to dip into it. But then I feel bad because it feels like I'm not paying for any of these additional items. His dad is.

But then he lives with me 80% of the time so I suppose my food and day to day costs are more. Just interested in how other people work it out.

OP posts:
Snorlaxo · 15/10/2024 10:46

Maintenance goes into my current account and covers costs like barber, contact lense subscription, clothes, food…

DreamW3aver · 15/10/2024 10:44

I suspect it's very unusual to badge the money for something specific, doesn't everyone just have it as part of their total money and spend it on living costs?

Singleandproud · 15/10/2024 10:42

Mine goes in the general pot but there are only two of us.
Having it separate is fine but you should be using it to help pay for whatever DS needs now, not having him go without. It doesn't matter if you use the money his dad gives you for it because it evens out with the money you spend on his day-to-day needs, his food, water, electricity, any subscriptions, fuel in your car to cart him around etc.

Danikm151 · 15/10/2024 10:40

Goes into the costs for the month.
CM isn’t specifically for things for the child- it’s a reimbursement of day to day costs that are associated with having a child. Higher bills, food shop clothes etc

Fireandflames · 15/10/2024 10:37

Living. I get £341 for two chidren, that doesn’t even cover the food bill for them.

3peassuit · 15/10/2024 10:19

I'm not sure how it could be separated out. Your DS eats, is housed, educated,entertained and fed from the family pot so it seems right that cm is included in that pot.

BlackStrayCat · 15/10/2024 10:18

school uniform
school monthly fee
food
bills
her trips out & school excursions
school ipad/books
transport (bus)
clothes
tampax
phone
cosmetics
presents

every bloody thing

I pay around 1/4 but have full custody and do 100% everything and have done for years and years until I divorced the shit as he locked us out of our home.

PepaWepa · 15/10/2024 10:09

General living. Although I do try to get something just for her or a day out, cinema trip etc out of it as it's technically her money, but living expenses are also for her benefit so I think it's all fair either way.

Original poster
kungfullama · 15/10/2024 10:06

@traybake81 no I'm not. I just have this feeling that any money for ds should be for ds. So if it's going into the family pot which is spent on my other dc it's harder to keep track of.

OP posts:
traybake81 · 15/10/2024 09:37

kungfullama · 15/10/2024 09:33

I've probably made it more complicated for myself by putting it in a separate account.

how so?

Ate you in receipt of any benefits?

Original poster
kungfullama · 15/10/2024 09:33

I've probably made it more complicated for myself by putting it in a separate account.

OP posts:
Fuzzyblank · 15/10/2024 09:29

Goes into my account and is absorbed into all general household expenses. I cover all food, clothes, pocket money, school expenses etc. he has them 4 nights a month.

socks1107 · 15/10/2024 09:29

I just added it to the general pot and spent it on what was needed.
Sometimes bills, sometimes fun, sometimes school uniform etc. The last few years paid for driving lessons

traybake81 · 15/10/2024 09:28

Just goes in to my family pot

so mortgage, holidays, groceries, what i buy for the children, what i buy for myself, the car….

basically i have no idea because it just goes in, and then goes out!

Very wealthy ex and i receive substantial maintenance

StMarieforme · 15/10/2024 09:27

Living. He paid a pitiful amount as he conned the CSA. Then always played the Disney Dad.