I am too old, aren’t it?

Not too old. I started caring for a one year old at 56, she's still here 20 years later.

its not ageist for god sake. 🙄

Indeed.

Wise words.

All these comments saying you'll find it hard to conceive is BS also the comments about it effecting your other kids. Nothing beats a new addition to the family. I say go for it 44 is not too old at all I've just had my 6th and my eldest is 19 youngest is 3 weeks just because you have a baby it doesn't mean you stop being there for your big kids you still have to do everything you would do if you didn't have a baby I don't know why people think just because you have a baby you're not there for older kids

Physically too old? Not necessarily no, I had my second naturally at 45 (fell pregnant at 44 though, & had a 4 year old at the time). There is however a lot to think about, how would you all cope should you miscarry, abnormalities, would you go down the IVF route, how would your existing children feel plus ttc itself can be an emotional roller coaster. PP's have made some excellent points/things to think about. Its possible but whether its right only you can decide really. You've been through a lot and done really well to get where you have. Wishing you the best of luck whatever you decide.

Having reread your posts I think a bigger question is whether it’s a good idea to have a child with this man. He may be a lovely boyfriend but he doesn’t sound mad keen to have kids and a baby would put a strain on your relationship. Really hard for your existing children too who have already suffered a lot.

I had DC2 at 44.

Only you know how you feel but no I certainly wouldn’t

I had my one and only child very unexpectedly at 42, early years were fine but honestly as they get older so do you, and by teenage years being in my 50's I found really tiring, in fact I warned my DD early on that I would be too old for teenage tantrums and I wouldn't be putting up with them. We have managed without much trouble and she's just graduated uni and started her career. The other point to remember of course is you will not be alone, your partner will share the load.

You're not too old - I had my first and only baby at 47 years old. I had a really easy pregnancy and birth. I think being an older mother has lots of advantages - you don't crave going out all.the time, you know who you are and are more stable probably financially. Perhaps seeing a consultant would help you decide together. If you decide not to go ahead you can still have a great life together. Good luck!

You will be 65 when your child is 20.
how does that sit with you?
I can’t say if that’s good or bad, only you know.

"Your partner has no idea what having a child means really. He might like the idea of it but it would effectively, all be on you."

This is so true. You know how much work and responsibility a baby is, how you have to change your whole life, it's much harder to live spontaneously with a toddler, and you'll need baby sitters for the next 10-15 years if you want to go out for a meal or anything like that. You know this, but, does he, really??

Also, have you mentioned it to your existing children? How would they feel about it?

I'm your age and would love to have a third child, and the opportunity to. I'd be trying to right now, if my partner was here.
If you want to, then I don't think you're too old.
And I've heard people say that they regret not having another, and as someone else posted on one of these forums or fb group recently said, "People tend to regret not having children, a lot more than those who regret having children, because you love them"
sorry, I haven't worded it very well, I can't quite quote it how she said it 😅
xx

I also have a 14 year old and a 6 year old. It’s absolutely fabulous having a teenager and a baby ❤️

I just had a baby at 39, 40 next month. I don’t think it’s too old.

You are free to try if you want to, but consider the hugely increased chance of miscarriage and complications.

Only you can answer his question. Don’t want a child or not. If you still get pregnant naturally then you’re not too old. But be prepared that this might not happen.

If you really want a third child go for it I had my third ar 43, no issue whstsoever

This

Go for it! My sister had twins at 42! If you both want a baby, then a baby is a good idea! You’ll be monitored closely because of your age, and the risks of genetic conditions are slightly higher, but it’s certainly not beyond the realms of possibility to have a very healthy normal baby at your age! Go for it! There are worse things in the world than a loved, wanted baby to older parents!

The other line on my bingo card for this topic is "Nobody ever regrets having another child."

Please do it!!!!

for all the posters accusing me of lying
i don't appreciate that thank you very much
she's a close friend

said friend is very alternative as am i but not to her extent

she's a hippie, home educates, vegan, lives off the land, white witch
doesn't do doctors only herbal medicine and practices and had all home births
kids are very well loved and looked after
they are just different

they all live in 3 giant tepees with running electric in a field and this is her 12 and 13th baby
she already had twins then got pregnant 6-8 weeks later on purpose
said she will continue until nature stops

she uses a herbal form of clomid but was having regular periods anyway

there is other alternative ways of living just becasue you don't know it exists doesn't mean its not there hundreds live differently from society's norm

I do get tired of this old chestnut on these threads. 🙄

Fact is that someone whose parents don't have them til they're 45 - are FAR more likely to lose their parents by the time they're 25-30, (than if their parents have them when they're say, 25-30.)

This 'some people die at 30/some people live til 107' argument is ludicrous. A child is WAY more likely to lose their parents at a young age, if the parents are in their late 40s when they have them.

Can't believe this obvious fact needs explaining to be honest.