I am too old, aren’t it?

308 replies

OrangeKettle · 14/10/2024 21:51

I think I know the answer I’ll get from everyone.

I was in an emotionally abusive marriage. I used to read posts on here, with women in a similar situation, and know I should leave, but couldn’t. Eventually I managed to. It was the best thing I ever did. It took me years to realise what had happened and that it wasn’t normal, and to start getting over it.

7 years later, I met someone who is the complete opposite. The kindest, generous, nicest, helpful man ever. Looks after me constantly. We’ve never had a cross word. Hard working, supportive, etc. We now live together too.

I have two children from my first marriage. One is early teens, one is slightly younger.

My partner has no children. He wanted them but has accepted he won’t have any with me. He says he’d rather be with me than not.

I would love another child. I know he would. He would also be a fab dad. Not like my ex.

However…. I am 44. He is 7 years younger. I am in a better situation (mentally) and still very active. I have periods every 28 days. Still ovulate at the “right” time (despite having coil, I still get periods).

But, it would be wrong, wouldn’t it? I’m too old, aren’t I?

OP posts:

PosiePetal · 14/10/2024 21:59

No, you're not too old! My great grandmother was 45 when she gave birth to my grandmother in 1921. Lived ‘til nearly 90.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 14/10/2024 21:58

I think it's too old personally but I'd finished having mine in my 20s and, at 44 now, I couldn't imagine going back to all of that!

If you're up for it though, why not? Maybe go for a health check up first just to get the best advice on having a baby as an older mother

Falseshamrok · 14/10/2024 21:56

I mean, I wouldn’t.

but if you feel able to, then go for it

Purpleroseofbiro · 14/10/2024 21:56

Not too old but its a can of worms all the same. If you start to try and really want to have a child then you have losses, have to do IVF or whatever it could tear you and your relationship apart. Very hard to stay dispassionate about it once you start down that path.

Gowlett · 14/10/2024 21:55

ohfook is right. I gave it one last shot at 43, had my son at 44.

appletreeorbanana · 14/10/2024 21:54

Omg your only 44. If you want a baby and he does then all you can do is try

TheNeverEndingOver · 14/10/2024 21:53

nah, not too old at all!

ohfook · 14/10/2024 21:52

It's literally one of those situations where you'll only know if you try.

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