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Original poster

To announce pregnancy at birthday party

364 replies

MyJollyLion · 13/10/2024 15:01

My mother is having a party soon to celebrate a milestone birthday.

Husband and I have been TTC for almost a couple of years now, which mum knows about and is excited for. We’ve recently found out I’m pregnant, and the date of her party will be just after our 12 week scan, so we wanted to announce it at the party - nobody knows yet.

I’m youngest child and this will be my first baby. Mum has three grandkids already, all are young adults now and one of those has two kids too. Mum is very maternal and loves having babies and kids in the family.

I think she will be delighted for us but just wondering if it’s poor form to announce at her birthday party, is it like a lesser version of announcing it at a wedding or something.

OP posts:
Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 13/10/2024 15:10

My mum would be delighted, but plenty wouldn’t. I would also tell my mum privately before the party so she’s first to know.

EwwSprouts · 13/10/2024 15:10

I wouldn't even tell her until after her day. You are supposed to be celebrating her big birthday day. She won't have another one for a decade. Let her be the centre of attention instead of wanting an audience for yourself.
Congratulations!

SatinHeart · 13/10/2024 15:09

Whaleandsnail6 · 13/10/2024 15:03

I think tell mum a few days before the party. If she then wants to use the party to announce the pregnancy, then she can be a part of that

Agree with this.

Kinneddar · 13/10/2024 15:09

It's very poor form & the fact you're asking means you know that. The party is her day. Let her have it

As pp suggested tell her before the party she might announce it I'd she's making any kind of speech or suggest you tell people but don't ask her if you can - shes hardly going to feel she can say no - or just do it. That's just rude

IveGotALovelyBunchOfCoconutss · 13/10/2024 15:07

Yes this is unreasonable. It will take the focus off your mum and it is her party. Announce before or after. Things like this can cause a rift even if you think she will be over the moon etc. timing is wrong

Olika · 13/10/2024 15:06

Absolutely not. That's a really bad idea!

MumChp · 13/10/2024 15:06

It's her party not yours. Tell her the day before if you want to break the news ans get her permission to use 'her day'.

ReadWithScepticism · 13/10/2024 15:05

Tell your mum first then ask her what she thinks about the wider announcement

Dotto · 13/10/2024 15:04

No, the party is about her, not you. I would tell her the day before the party, then she can be the one to share her excitement, if she wants.

PurBal · 13/10/2024 15:04

I think that you're asking MN means that yes, it's probably poor form. Can you speak to her and tell her your news beforehand then share more widely at the party if she's happy?

W0tnow · 13/10/2024 15:04

Oh no. Definitely not. Announce it before, as that will explain why you’re not drinking.

Whaleandsnail6 · 13/10/2024 15:03

I think tell mum a few days before the party. If she then wants to use the party to announce the pregnancy, then she can be a part of that

MountainDewey · 13/10/2024 15:03

Hmm how about telling your mum first and perhaps asking if its OK to announce to wider family at the party?

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 13/10/2024 15:03

Yes it is. Very rude. The focus should be on your DM, not you. Tell her afterwards!